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Posted: **Wed Jun 14, 2017 8:56 pm**

taalismn wrote:Principle: "I'm going to be driving a few golfballs off the roof and down the field on my lunch break."
Vice Principle: "Still trying to figure out the minefields, sir?"

"Unlike our last Principle, who tried to escape with a hang glider, while wearing a yellow bathrobe and fuzzy pink slippers..."

Posted: **Wed Jun 14, 2017 9:47 pm**

SRoss wrote:[

"Unlike our last Principle, who tried to escape with a hang glider, while wearing a yellow bathrobe and fuzzy pink slippers..."

"Just his bad luck Monument City Air Defense was having live ammo exercises that day."

Posted: **Wed Jun 14, 2017 10:23 pm**

PA: "ATTENTION STUDENTS AND STAFF! THE MUSICAL LINE UP FOR THE JUNE END OF SCHOOL CELEBRATION IS; MINMEI AND THE ROBOTECH SOUND FORCE!!! I'D JUST LIKE TO REMIND STUDENTS AND STAFF THAT THE MINES AND SENTRY GUNS ARE STILL ACTIVE! THAT IS ALL..."

Posted: **Thu Jun 15, 2017 3:19 am**

SRoss wrote:PA: "ATTENTION STUDENTS AND STAFF! THE MUSICAL LINE UP FOR THE JUNE END OF SCHOOL CELEBRATION IS; MINMEI AND THE ROBOTECH SOUND FORCE!!! I'D JUST LIKE TO REMIND STUDENTS AND STAFF THAT THE MINES AND SENTRY GUNS ARE STILL ACTIVE! THAT IS ALL..."

(Sounds of explosions and gunfire as students toss Minmei and the Robotrch Sound Fource into the Sentry Guns' lines of fire and the mine fields...)

(Down Below...)

Minmei and the Robotech Sound Force: :shock:

Charon: "They REALLY don't like you!"

Posted: **Fri Jun 16, 2017 10:34 am**

Minmei: "You know, sometimes I don't really like myself either, for the things I've had to do for money."
Band Member: "..."
Minmei:

"I refer, of course, to the Petit Cola ads..."
Band Member:(closes mouth, rather than continue with what he ALMOST was about to say)

Posted: **Fri Jun 16, 2017 3:52 pm**

taalismn wrote:Minmei: "You know, sometimes I don't really like myself either, for the things I've had to do for money."
Band Member: "..."
Minmei: "I refer, of course, to the Petit Cola ads..."
Band Member:(closes mouth, rather than continue with what he ALMOST was about to say)

Random MCHS Student #1: "So...what's with this video?"
Random MCHS Student #2: "I didn't know you could bend like that..."
Minmei: :shock:

"That isn't me! I thought I destroyed that...!"

Posted: **Fri Jun 16, 2017 5:08 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Minmei: "You know, sometimes I don't really like myself either, for the things I've had to do for money."
Band Member: "..."
Minmei: "I refer, of course, to the Petit Cola ads..."
Band Member:(closes mouth, rather than continue with what he ALMOST was about to say)

Random MCHS Student #1: "So...what's with this video?"
Random MCHS Student #2: "I didn't know you could bend like that..."
Minmei: "That isn't me! I thought I destroyed that...!"

Random MCHS Student #3: "Wow Miss Minmei! I didn't know you did Disney films..."

Posted: **Fri Jun 16, 2017 9:25 pm**

Random MCHS Student: "So exactly how much weight did you have to lose to play Cruella DeVille? And how'd you manage to look so tall?"
Minmei: "I was still recovering from Optera; my therapist thought it would be a good idea to try something new. And the height was clever forced perspective camera work ."

Posted: **Fri Jun 16, 2017 11:05 pm**

taalismn wrote:Random MCHS Student: "So exactly how much weight did you have to lose to play Cruella DeVille? And how'd you manage to look so tall?"
Minmei: "I was still recovering from Optera; my therapist thought it would be a good idea to try something new. And the height was clever forced perspective camera work ."

Minmei: "That year I also played Ursula in The Little Mermaid."

Students: :shock:

Posted: **Fri Jun 16, 2017 11:17 pm**

SRoss wrote:[

Minmei: "That year I also played Ursula in The Little Mermaid."

Students:

"Great costume."
Minmei: "Wasn't a costume. Optera. Edwatds, Genesis Pit."
" :eek:

ewwwwwww.... :eek:

"
Minmei: "Yeah, for several months I dreaded waking up in the morning, wondering what junk DNA I would be manifesting next and what new limbs I'd be having to deal with."

Posted: **Wed Jun 21, 2017 10:42 pm**

EShemarian: "Today class we be learning the fine art of Fire Dancing. Please remove your clothes and all flammable objects."

Rei rushes over and whispers in her ear.

EShemarian: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN, MOST HUMANS ARE FLAMMABLE!?!"

Posted: **Sat Jun 24, 2017 5:28 am**

Random MCHS Student #1: "I don't like the dance class teacher..."
Random MCHS Student #2: "The fact that she has no idea that fire dancing does not mean lighting yourself on fire and then dancing?"

Posted: **Sat Jun 24, 2017 11:25 am**

Arnie100 wrote:Random MCHS Student #1: "I don't like the dance class teacher..."
Random MCHS Student #2: "The fact that she has no idea that fire dancing does not mean lighting yourself on fire and then dancing?"

EShemarian: "Now class, our two volunteers will demonstrate."

Edwards: (Whispering to Kyle) "I have a bad feeling about this..."

Posted: **Sat Jun 24, 2017 12:32 pm**

SRoss wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:Random MCHS Student #1: "I don't like the dance class teacher..."
Random MCHS Student #2: "The fact that she has no idea that fire dancing does not mean lighting yourself on fire and then dancing?"

EShemarian: "Now class, our two volunteers will demonstrate."

Edwards: (Whispering to Kyle) "I have a bad feeling about this..."

Random MCHS Student #1: :shock:

"Man, those two can run!"
Random MCHS Student #2: "Notice that they were running AWAY from the infirmary?" :nh:

(At the infirmary...)

Washu: "You forgot to take your meds!"

Posted: **Sat Jun 24, 2017 8:15 pm**

SRoss wrote:EShemarian: "Today class we be learning the fine art of Fire Dancing. Please remove your clothes and all flammable objects."

Rei rushes over and whispers in her ear.

EShemarian: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN, MOST HUMANS ARE FLAMMABLE!?!"

Student: "We don't tan, we BARBECUE."

Posted: **Tue Jun 27, 2017 4:57 pm**

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:EShemarian: "Today class we be learning the fine art of Fire Dancing. Please remove your clothes and all flammable objects."

Rei rushes over and whispers in her ear.

EShemarian: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN, MOST HUMANS ARE FLAMMABLE!?!"

Student: "We don't tan, we BARBECUE."

"We also broil."

Posted: **Tue Jun 27, 2017 5:34 pm**

"Homeroom #7 has working AC."
"Homeroom #7 has it cranked up to 'Plutonian atmosphere'-level cold."
"Who wants it THAT cold?!"

"Welcome to Cold Weather Survival 101, the summer sessions."

Posted: **Tue Jun 27, 2017 6:19 pm**

taalismn wrote:"Homeroom #7 has working AC."
"Homeroom #7 has it cranked up to 'Plutonian atmosphere'-level cold."
"Who wants it THAT cold?!"

"Welcome to Cold Weather Survival 101, the summer sessions."

"Call the infirmary, the Principle tried to emulate that guy in the Star Trek episode, now there's a block of ice in the shower."

Posted: **Tue Jun 27, 2017 6:31 pm**

SRoss wrote:[

"Call the infirmary, the Principle tried to emulate that guy in the Star Trek episode, now there's a block of ice in the shower."

Washuu: "Okay, who forgot proper lab protocol when handling psychoactive viruses?!"

Posted: **Wed Jun 28, 2017 12:50 am**

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:[

"Call the infirmary, the Principle tried to emulate that guy in the Star Trek episode, now there's a block of ice in the shower."

Washuu: "Okay, who forgot proper lab protocol when handling psychoactive viruses?!"

Kyle:

(Glares at Edwards...)
Edwards: "What? There wasn't a label on the phial"
Kyle: :nh:

"If there ever is a zombie outbreak, it'll probably be YOUR fault."

Posted: **Wed Jun 28, 2017 9:24 pm**

Edwards' zombie plan is to throw Kyle to them to buy time....

Posted: **Thu Jun 29, 2017 1:49 am**

taalismn wrote:Edwards' zombie plan is to throw Kyle to them to buy time....

Kyle:

"You really would do that, wouldn't you?!"
Edwards: (Shrugs...) "Every man for himself."

Posted: **Thu Jun 29, 2017 7:39 am**

Arnie100 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Edwards' zombie plan is to throw Kyle to them to buy time....

Kyle: "You really would do that, wouldn't you?!"
Edwards: (Shrugs...) "Every man for himself."

Head Zombie: *Ignore Kyle, brain not good. Get other one.*

Posted: **Thu Jun 29, 2017 1:09 pm**

SRoss wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Edwards' zombie plan is to throw Kyle to them to buy time....

Kyle: "You really would do that, wouldn't you?!"
Edwards: (Shrugs...) "Every man for himself."

Head Zombie: *Ignore Kyle, brain not good. Get other one.*

Kyle: "Here, let me give you a hand up to the roof where he is."
Head Zombie: "Much thanks."

Posted: **Thu Jun 29, 2017 2:44 pm**

Random MCHS Student #1: :nh:

"Now we got one brain-dead fool helping a bunch of brain-hungry zombies go after another brain-dead fool..."
Random MCHS Student #2: "Yup...so who're you rooting for?'
Random MCHS Student #1: "I hope the zombies eat both of them."

Posted: **Thu Jun 29, 2017 4:39 pm**

Emergency Closet in MCHS#69:
"In event of zombie outbreak, alien terraforming wave, or xenomorph infestation, break glass."
(behind the glass is a heavy-duty flamethrower)

Posted: **Thu Jun 29, 2017 5:20 pm**

taalismn wrote:Emergency Closet in MCHS#69:
"In event of zombie outbreak, alien terraforming wave, or xenomorph infestation, break glass."
(behind the glass is a heavy-duty flamethrower)

"Crap...no one filled the fuel tank..."
:frazz:

Posted: **Thu Jun 29, 2017 11:17 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Emergency Closet in MCHS#69:
"In event of zombie outbreak, alien terraforming wave, or xenomorph infestation, break glass."
(behind the glass is a heavy-duty flamethrower)

"Crap...no one filled the fuel tank..."

"I got a bottle of hot sauce from the cafeteria."
"Okay, but that just might melt the 'thrower...."

Posted: **Thu Jun 29, 2017 11:28 pm**

taalismn wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Emergency Closet in MCHS#69:
"In event of zombie outbreak, alien terraforming wave, or xenomorph infestation, break glass."
(behind the glass is a heavy-duty flamethrower)

"Crap...no one filled the fuel tank..."

"I got a bottle of hot sauce from the cafeteria."
"Okay, but that just might melt the 'thrower...."

"It's the Chef's Special Hot Sauce."
:shock:

"Yup. Just one drop..." (One drop disintegrates a chair...)
:shock:

Posted: **Fri Jun 30, 2017 12:42 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Emergency Closet in MCHS#69:
"In event of zombie outbreak, alien terraforming wave, or xenomorph infestation, break glass."
(behind the glass is a heavy-duty flamethrower)

"Crap...no one filled the fuel tank..."

"I got a bottle of hot sauce from the cafeteria."
"Okay, but that just might melt the 'thrower...."

"It's the Chef's Special Hot Sauce."

"Yup. Just one drop..." (One drop disintegrates a chair...)

Mr. Taylor: "Try this." :twisted:

(Hands them a clearly over built flame thrower)

Posted: **Fri Jun 30, 2017 1:02 pm**

SRoss wrote:
Mr. Taylor: "Try this." (Hands them a clearly over built flame thrower)

Mr. Taylor: (Wearing an NBC Suit...) "Just put the Chef's Special Hot Sauce in the tank and you're good to go!"
:twisted:

Zombies:

Posted: **Fri Jun 30, 2017 3:01 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:
SRoss wrote:
Mr. Taylor: "Try this." (Hands them a clearly over built flame thrower)

Mr. Taylor: (Wearing an NBC Suit...) "Just put the Chef's Special Hot Sauce in the tank and you're good to go!"

Zombies:

BSS Trooper: "What's wrong Chief?"
BSS Sargent: "I sense a great messy disaster is about to occur..." :frazz:

Posted: **Fri Jun 30, 2017 3:10 pm**

SRoss wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:
SRoss wrote:
Mr. Taylor: "Try this." (Hands them a clearly over built flame thrower)

Mr. Taylor: (Wearing an NBC Suit...) "Just put the Chef's Special Hot Sauce in the tank and you're good to go!"

Zombies:

BSS Trooper: "What's wrong Chief?"
BSS Sargent: "I sense a great messy disaster is about to occur..."

BSS Trooper (Points to Kyle and Edwards...) "That's why we have those two."
BSS Seargent: "Oh, right!"
Kyle: :nh:

Edwards:

Posted: **Fri Jun 30, 2017 7:35 pm**

Meanwhile... Back at MCH #69...

Things Never to Enhance with Protoculture

Chef's Special Hot Sauce...

Megumin: "An Explosion contest! Count me in!!!"

Worlds all over the UEsG now wondering what's setting off their seismographs...

Posted: **Fri Jun 30, 2017 8:12 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:[

BSS Trooper (Points to Kyle and Edwards...) "That's why we have those two."
BSS Seargent: "Oh, right!"
Kyle:
Edwards:

BSS Captain: "Sorry, they already have zombie duty."
Edwards: "...oh joy..."

Posted: **Fri Jun 30, 2017 9:27 pm**

Chef:

"All I added was paprika and ghost peppers..."

Posted: **Fri Jun 30, 2017 9:54 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:Chef: "All I added was paprika and ghost peppers..."

"...and the phosphorus powder..."

Posted: **Sat Jul 01, 2017 11:24 am**

taalismn wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:Chef: "All I added was paprika and ghost peppers..."

"...and the phosphorus powder..."

"Oh! and some left over thermite..."

Posted: **Sat Jul 01, 2017 11:32 am**

SRoss wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:Chef: "All I added was paprika and ghost peppers..."

"...and the phosphorus powder..."

"Oh! and some left over thermite..."

"Ah, the rich aroma of napalm! Smells like...breakfast."
"You shave yourself with a chainsaw, don't you?"

Posted: **Sat Jul 01, 2017 4:45 pm**

SRoss wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:Chef: "All I added was paprika and ghost peppers..."

"...and the phosphorus powder..."

"Oh! and some left over thermite..."

Chef: "Mr. Taylor added those. Said it needed MORE POWER."

Posted: **Sat Jul 01, 2017 5:40 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:[

Chef: "Mr. Taylor added those. Said it needed MORE POWER."

"Mr. Taylor was off his meds again, wasn't he?"

Posted: **Sat Jul 01, 2017 6:24 pm**

taalismn wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:[

Chef: "Mr. Taylor added those. Said it needed MORE POWER."

"Mr. Taylor was off his meds again, wasn't he?"

Mr. Taylor: :shock:

"NNNOOO...not those! Anything but those!"

Posted: **Sat Jul 01, 2017 7:05 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:[

Chef: "Mr. Taylor added those. Said it needed MORE POWER."

"Mr. Taylor was off his meds again, wasn't he?"

Mr. Taylor: "NNNOOO...not those! Anything but those!"

Washuu: (Wearing a nurse's uniform) "Be quiet and take your pills like a good little boy." :twisted:

Posted: **Sat Jul 01, 2017 8:49 pm**

SRoss wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:[

Chef: "Mr. Taylor added those. Said it needed MORE POWER."

"Mr. Taylor was off his meds again, wasn't he?"

Mr. Taylor: "NNNOOO...not those! Anything but those!"

Washuu: (Wearing a nurse's uniform) "Be quiet and take your pills like a good little boy."

Mr. Taylor: (Thinking to himself: She's not that bad looking in that nurse's uniform...are you NUTS?!) "PLEASE....I'll do ANYTHING..."
Washuu: :twisted:

"ANYTHING?"
Mr. Taylor: :frazz:

Posted: **Sat Jul 01, 2017 9:42 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:
SRoss wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:[

Chef: "Mr. Taylor added those. Said it needed MORE POWER."

"Mr. Taylor was off his meds again, wasn't he?"

Mr. Taylor: "NNNOOO...not those! Anything but those!"

Washuu: (Wearing a nurse's uniform) "Be quiet and take your pills like a good little boy."

Mr. Taylor: (Thinking to himself: She's not that bad looking in that nurse's uniform...are you NUTS?!) "PLEASE....I'll do ANYTHING..."
Washuu: "ANYTHING?"
Mr. Taylor:

Students: :eek:

Rei: "I feel like I should break out the prayer strips, but against the zombies, or them?"

Posted: **Sat Jul 01, 2017 10:41 pm**

There are no paper wards proof against stupidity....

Posted: **Sun Jul 02, 2017 4:38 pm**

(An hour later...)

Washuu: "That's right, Tim! Massage those feet! Massage it like you mean it!"
Mr. Taylor: :puke:

Random MCHS Student #1: :shock:

"That's SO wrong."
Random MCHS Student #2: "She still doesn't look too bad in that nurse's outfit..."
Random MCHS Student #1: "You are SO disturbed." :nh:

Random MCHS Student #2: (Shrugs...) "Being here long enough does that to you."

Posted: **Tue Jul 25, 2017 11:12 pm**

Meanwhile, in a back hallway of MCH #69.

Command Roomba: 《Mapping complete. Transmitting data.》

Posted: **Tue Jul 25, 2017 11:49 pm**

SRoss wrote:Meanwhile, in a back hallway of MCH #69.

Command Roomba: 《Mapping complete. Transmitting data.》

Roomba #1: <<Mapping? What's he on about?>>
Roomba: #2: <<I don't know. Maybe we should ignore him? And keep doing whatever it is we do?>>

Posted: **Wed Jul 26, 2017 9:44 am**

Arnie100 wrote:
SRoss wrote:Meanwhile, in a back hallway of MCH #69.

Command Roomba: 《Mapping complete. Transmitting data.》

Roomba #1: <<Mapping? What's he on about?>>
Roomba: #2: <<I don't know. Maybe we should ignore him? And keep doing whatever it is we do?>>

Roomba #3: <<Confirmed. Continuing primary programming. Tagging locations of valuables.>>

Forums of the Megaverse®

Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

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