Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

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Alpha 11
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Alpha 11 »

Arnie100 wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:So many Minmei clones...
And Colonel Woff's son can't get a date with ANY of them... :twisted:


Wasn't Woff's son named Johnny? :twisted:


Indeed.
"Face it, Johnny, seduction skills just aren't genetic in your family."


Nameless School staffer:" Excuse me Sir but I wanted to tell you that Johnny Woff will be arriving for his session in a few minutes. '

School Consuler T.R.Edwards:" Very good. "

*Nameless School Staffer leaves T.R.Edward's office*

* T.R.Edwards starts reading over Johnny Woff's school record *

* Crack! *

T.R.Edwards: " Come in the door's open. "

* CRASH!, SMASH!, CRACK! *

* T.R.Edwards sees the bloody blade of an axe being pulled out of what is left of the door to his consuling office to be replaced with a deranged and blood splattered face of a young boy. *

Johnny Woff: " Here's JOHNNY! "


Col. Wolfe: "I have had about enough of young man! Good grief! Breaking through Edwardd' door like that!"
Johnny: "But...Dad...!"
Col. Wolfe: "And you didn't use the axe on him?!"
Johnny: "I forgot!"
Col. Wolfe: "You're GROUNDED!!"


:lol: :lol:

Kargan3033 wrote:
guardiandashi wrote:A new student with a "slight hair disorder" walks through the doors out of the office/registration area grumbling..
Sarah stupid people all I did was answer my age and occupation, and they make comments about child soldiers and send me to school... only good thing is they at least acknowledged that I had some language skills, and some "military skills" sigh, lets see what classes I got:
first period remedial English
second period tutoring session, 1st grade English?
3rd period tutoring session Remedial Reading English?
4th Period Physical Education
Lunch
5th Period Home Economics
6th Period Shop (wielding)
7th period Varies Military/survival prep
after school ....

Spoiler:
Player: __________________________________
Name: _____Sarah________________________
Alignment: ___Scrupulous__________________
Hit Point: _50___Current HP: _______
_SDC:___172 Current: __SDC:_______
MDC 222 Current MDC __________
Level: _1___ EXP:______________
O.C.C.: _____Dogboy/PSI-hound Wolf____
Breed: __WOLF______Horror Factor: _____
IQ: __28 Skill bonus:________14__%
ME: __20 Save vs. psi/ins.:_____3___
MA: __15 Trust/intimidate:________%
SN PS: __46 Damage bonus +__+31 *___
PP: __29 Strike/parry/dodge +___7__
SN PE: __44 Coma/death/poison: 44%_/_+8
PB: __26 Charm/impress: ______80_%
Spd: 74/5 feet/minute: _____4440/300____
P.P.E.:___15_/______I.S.P.:__70___/______

Age: __5__Sex: ___Female
Height:7ft 7in_2.3368m Weight: _407lb 184.61kg__
Lift: ____________ Carry: ___________
Throw (max): _________ lbs ________ ft
Run: __47.72_mph ___4440__ft/min
______ft/melee _______ ft/attack
Hand-to-Hand: __Martial Arts____________
# of attacks: ____5___ Initiative: + _4_______
Strike: + ___8____ Parry: + __11____
Dodge: + 11______ Auto-dodge: + ______
Damage: + __31sdc__ Roll: + _6____
Disarm: + ______ Pull Punch: + ____
Punch: _6D6MDC_ Restrained punch: _1D6X10 SDC
Power Punch _2D6X10 MDC_____ 2D6 nip 5D6 Bite
Kick: _2D4____ Jump Kick: ___________
Flip: ______1D6___________________
Knock out: __nat 20_______ Critical __________-20
Death Blow: ______________________

Armor 1: Armor 2:
__DC AR: __ Env: ____ __DC AR: __ Env: ____
Penalties: Penalties:
Notes: Notes:

Area T C Area T C
Body Body
Head Head
Arms Arms
Legs Legs




Saving Throws:
Spell (12) + Possession +
Ritual (16) + Horror +
Psionics (____) + Death + 44 %
Toxin (16) + Pain (14) +
Poison (14) + Perception +
Drugs (15) +
Insanity (12) +
Skills +lv % Skills +lv %
Language: American 1% _98_% Basic Electronics 5% 44_%
Language: Spanish 3% _69_% Boxing
Climbing 5% _69_% Gymnastics
Intelligence______ 4% _52_% Cooking 5% 49_%
Land Navigation 4% _ 60_% Swimming 5% 64_%
Pilot: Hovercraft 5% _ 74_% Sniper
Read Sensory Equip 5% _54_% Wrestling
Running Forced March
Wilderness Survival 5% _54_% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% ________________ ____ ____%
OCC Related ________________ ____ ____%
Armorer 3% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
Basic Mechanics(**) 5% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
First Aid 5% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
Parachuting 5% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
Interrogation Tech. 5% 39_% ________________ ____ ____%
Recognize Weapon 5% 49_% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% Climb Rope /Rappel 2% 74_%
________________ ___ ____% Basic Prowl 44_%
________________ ___ ____% Back Flip 2% 84_%
________________ ___ ____% work Parallel bars/rings 3% 74_%
________________ ___ ____% Sense of Balance 2% 64_%

Weapon Damage St/Par
Aim/Bst Ammo Range ROF
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/

Weapon Proficiencies Str/Aim Thr/Bst Par/Rng Dam/Rate
Energy Pistol
Energy Rifle
Sword
Heavy MD Weapons














Cybernetics/Bionics/Biowizardry:________________
______________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________

Vehicle log
Type: ______________________________________
Crew: ______________________________________
Max speed: _________ Terrain: _________________
Max range: _______ Engine Type: _______________
Length: ________ Weight: __________
Area T C Area T C
Main Body
Pilot Comp.
Tires
Weapon Dam St/Br RoF Range Ammo
/

/

/


Vehicle Notes:_______________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________
___________________________________________

Psionics Range Duration save I.S.P.
Sense Evil ____ _______ ___ ____
Sense Magic ______ ____ _______ ___ ____
Sixth Sense ______ ____ _______ ___ ____
Empathy (rec. only) ____ _______ ___ ____
Total Recall ____ _______ ___ 2
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____

Equipment: A suit of heavy: (50 MDC. standard) Dog Pack DPM Riot armor (Note:Full environmental armor IS generally reserved for officers, Dog
Boy Special Forces and special assignments.). uniform, dress uniform.
tinted goggles or non-environmental helmet with or without visor. PDD pocket audio recorder, pocket laser distancer. flashlight,
pocket mirror. cigarette lighter. 100 feet (30.5 m) of lightweight
rope. small hammer. four spikes. 1D6 animal snares, infrared distancing
binoculars. portable language translator, survival knife, a
pair of Vibro-Knives or Vibro-Claws a Vibro-Saber, C-18 laser pistol. a C-12 laser assault rifle. both with telescopic sight and nightvision scope, four additional E-Clips for the weapon, plus knapsack, backpack, utility belt. air tilter. gas mask, and canteen.
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
Credits: CS: _____________ BM: _____________ Other:___________
Metals & Gems: _____________________________________________
Tradable goods: _____________________________________________
Other: _____________________________________________________

Notes:__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Dog Boy Abilities:
Sense Psychic & Magic:
Track Specific Psychic Scent: _____/_____% Range ______/______ft
+20% with blood, hair, or clothing, -10% near strong PPE source,
-1/2 near Ley Line
Recognize Psychic Scent: __4%__/__24__%
Sense Supernatural Being, ID Creature + 2% 76_%
Superior Sense of Smell ½ penalties while blind (-5 S/P/D):
ID Common & Strong Scent: ______ ft _84__%
Recognize & ID Specific Scent ______ ft _68___%
Track by Specific Scent Alone: Range ______/______ ft Roll every
1000 ft a failed roll loses trail 2 out of 3 rolls to relocate the trail.
Keen Sense of Hearing: 75% better than humans
Good Sight: 200-270 degree field of vision. Can see in color.

Special Abilities and Information:_PE as applies to weight/load and exertion 2x human 1/2 fatigue dogboy, 1/2 fatigue extreme PE, can be active for 6+hrs due to supernatural PE________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________

Cries and all because I was honest when I told that person I was 5 years old, and I didn't know where I was after I stumbled through a RIFT.


Nice!, thanks for joining, I look forward to seeing what you will do with this character. 8)


Same!

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:[


Nameless School staffer:" Excuse me Sir but I wanted to tell you that Johnny Woff will be arriving for his session in a few minutes. '

School Consuler T.R.Edwards:" Very good. "

*Nameless School Staffer leaves T.R.Edward's office*

* T.R.Edwards starts reading over Johnny Woff's school record *

* Crack! *

T.R.Edwards: " Come in the door's open. "

* CRASH!, SMASH!, CRACK! *

* T.R.Edwards sees the bloody blade of an axe being pulled out of what is left of the door to his consuling office to be replaced with a deranged and blood splattered face of a young boy. *

Johnny Woff: " Here's JOHNNY! "



Yep, and the other school counselor's the Palladium Forum's resident Macrossist/anti-Robotech. :P
"Look, quit any idea of being a robotechnician, a robotech pilot, a robotech ANYTHING. There's no future in it, and good riddance to it. Nobody will love you. Heck, damn few people love you now aside from a few old-time geeks. Your parents mismanaged you, you don't even have an original personality; it's all cribbed from other sources and other people. Learn Japanese and get a REAL life, why don't you?!"

Keeps the school psychologist busy with emergency calls and writing anti-depressant prescriptions.

He only took the job because he can use his office as a storage cubicle for his stuff(it's cheaper than renting a self-storage bunker). :P :P


:lol:
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Arnie100
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Arnie100 »

"So; who's organizing the prom this year?"
"The Minmei Clones..."
"Wonder how that's gonna turn out..."
"...And who'll survive the experience..."
They can't see me...Right!?
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by guardiandashi »

Arnie100 wrote:"So; who's organizing the prom this year?"
"The Minmei Clones..."
"Wonder how that's gonna turn out..."
"...And who'll survive the experience..."


Sarah looked at the clock and realized that she was supposed to be in her "first grade English tutoring session" so she headed towards that part of the school according to the map, or at least what she thought was the right part of the school, considering she couldn't read letters at all.

She ended up getting very lost, instead of ending up in the library, tutoring center, she ended up at the ROTC Simulation center.... where she got confused as she couldn't find the right room.

after various people "helped" get her straightened out she finally ended up being taken to the tutoring center....

(where she about had a "mental" seeing all the books in the library.)

after that all got straightened out, she spent the last 5 minutes in her "1st grade English tutoring" before being going to the remedial reading tutoring where they worked on things like A, or a is for apple, B is for boy, C is for cat (she looked for the cat) D is for dog.....

after she finished the tutoring session she got specific directions on how to get to the gym and phys ed building. Upon arriving at the phys ed she was confused for a minute or so before a helpful fellow student suggested that since there was no option for "dogboys" she should go into the "girls" side locker and changing room. She went in and changed into the "exercise" clothing she had been provided, and headed out with the rest of the students, after a brief lecture the instructor told them to start stretching so she did, then they were told to do 10 pushups, Sara ripped them off in 30 seconds including a full second held in the "up", and "Down" positions per her training. when the instructor didn't believe she had done them and told her to do them again (plus 10 more for balk talk) she did 20 more in 60 seconds and counted each...
after observing for a few more exercises the instructor started giving directions of the nature of: ok 20 sit-ups, Sarah do 80 instead....

after the warmup and basic exercises were done the instructor said ok we are going to have a "light workout today" heh heh lets run for thirty minutes at the best pace you can maintain around the 1/4 mile track everyone else groaned, but Sarah perked up.... when the instructor blew their whistle and yelled "GO!!" Sarah took off, running, after she finished her first lap when everyone else was just about to the first turn on the track, She decided to run in the outside track, and still ran 100 laps before the time was up. Sarah was panting a bit when they finished, of course most of the students had only ran about 2-5 miles in the time she ran 25.
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Kargan3033
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

guardiandashi wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:"So; who's organizing the prom this year?"
"The Minmei Clones..."
"Wonder how that's gonna turn out..."
"...And who'll survive the experience..."


Sarah looked at the clock and realized that she was supposed to be in her "first grade English tutoring session" so she headed towards that part of the school according to the map, or at least what she thought was the right part of the school, considering she couldn't read letters at all.

She ended up getting very lost, instead of ending up in the library, tutoring center, she ended up at the ROTC Simulation center.... where she got confused as she couldn't find the right room.

after various people "helped" get her straightened out she finally ended up being taken to the tutoring center....

(where she about had a "mental" seeing all the books in the library.)

after that all got straightened out, she spent the last 5 minutes in her "1st grade English tutoring" before being going to the remedial reading tutoring where they worked on things like A, or a is for apple, B is for boy, C is for cat (she looked for the cat) D is for dog.....

after she finished the tutoring session she got specific directions on how to get to the gym and phys ed building. Upon arriving at the phys ed she was confused for a minute or so before a helpful fellow student suggested that since there was no option for "dogboys" she should go into the "girls" side locker and changing room. She went in and changed into the "exercise" clothing she had been provided, and headed out with the rest of the students, after a brief lecture the instructor told them to start stretching so she did, then they were told to do 10 pushups, Sara ripped them off in 30 seconds including a full second held in the "up", and "Down" positions per her training. when the instructor didn't believe she had done them and told her to do them again (plus 10 more for balk talk) she did 20 more in 60 seconds and counted each...
after observing for a few more exercises the instructor started giving directions of the nature of: ok 20 sit-ups, Sarah do 80 instead....

after the warmup and basic exercises were done the instructor said ok we are going to have a "light workout today" heh heh lets run for thirty minutes at the best pace you can maintain around the 1/4 mile track everyone else groaned, but Sarah perked up.... when the instructor blew their whistle and yelled "GO!!" Sarah took off, running, after she finished her first lap when everyone else was just about to the first turn on the track, She decided to run in the outside track, and still ran 100 laps before the time was up. Sarah was panting a bit when they finished, of course most of the students had only ran about 2-5 miles in the time she ran 25.


Nice! :-) , I wonder what she'll be like when she goes for lunch in the lunchroom with the rest of the students.
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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taalismn
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

"So how are you fitting in, Vice Principle Federoff?"
"Never thought self say this; miss frozen gulag. Miss being able to drink openly. Miss friends on eternal ice flow. Even miss loopy girl who run outside after shower and freeze solid."
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by SRoss »

taalismn wrote:"So how are you fitting in, Vice Principle Federoff?"
"Never thought self say this; miss frozen gulag. Miss being able to drink openly. Miss friends on eternal ice flow. Even miss loopy girl who run outside after shower and freeze solid."


You realize, if they are recruiting from the Ice Guard, Mauve Squadron doesn't have a hope of avoiding assignment here.
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taalismn
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

SRoss wrote:
taalismn wrote:"So how are you fitting in, Vice Principle Federoff?"
"Never thought self say this; miss frozen gulag. Miss being able to drink openly. Miss friends on eternal ice flow. Even miss loopy girl who run outside after shower and freeze solid."


You realize, if they are recruiting from the Ice Guard, Mauve Squadron doesn't have a hope of avoiding assignment here.



I'm thinking Federoff is a one-shot; he's quietly drafted out of Ice Guard to spy on the Monument City/UEG educational system(it's yet another grundge job assigned to keep the old warhorse too busy to embarrass his superiors back in New Moscow, and it keeps the young KGB National Security Intelligence Bureau mooks entertained).
Eventually Federoff does manage to get back to Ice Guard for the Great Ice Guard TimeSkip(though, given the way're mixing and messing both time and space here, it's a toss-up if it ever really happens), incidentally accidentally bringing along a class or two of the kids on what is booked as a 'nature walk', and more elaborately as a 'field trip to see a glacier park', because frankly nobody(publically) knows about Ice Guard or where it is(frankly, though, some opf the parents who drop their kids off at MCHS #69 couldn't care less, and might actually breathe a sigh of relief if their kids disappear...they might even consider it ironically appropriate if their offspring wound up at a gulag meant to disappear undesirables*).

*This might be covered/legitimized in the MCHS #69 spin-off: "Summer Camp Frostbite".
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Alpha 11
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Alpha 11 »

Arnie100 wrote:"So; who's organizing the prom this year?"
"The Minmei Clones..."
"Wonder how that's gonna turn out..."
"...And who'll survive the experience..."


:lol:

guardiandashi wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:"So; who's organizing the prom this year?"
"The Minmei Clones..."
"Wonder how that's gonna turn out..."
"...And who'll survive the experience..."


Sarah looked at the clock and realized that she was supposed to be in her "first grade English tutoring session" so she headed towards that part of the school according to the map, or at least what she thought was the right part of the school, considering she couldn't read letters at all.

She ended up getting very lost, instead of ending up in the library, tutoring center, she ended up at the ROTC Simulation center.... where she got confused as she couldn't find the right room.

after various people "helped" get her straightened out she finally ended up being taken to the tutoring center....

(where she about had a "mental" seeing all the books in the library.)

after that all got straightened out, she spent the last 5 minutes in her "1st grade English tutoring" before being going to the remedial reading tutoring where they worked on things like A, or a is for apple, B is for boy, C is for cat (she looked for the cat) D is for dog.....

after she finished the tutoring session she got specific directions on how to get to the gym and phys ed building. Upon arriving at the phys ed she was confused for a minute or so before a helpful fellow student suggested that since there was no option for "dogboys" she should go into the "girls" side locker and changing room. She went in and changed into the "exercise" clothing she had been provided, and headed out with the rest of the students, after a brief lecture the instructor told them to start stretching so she did, then they were told to do 10 pushups, Sara ripped them off in 30 seconds including a full second held in the "up", and "Down" positions per her training. when the instructor didn't believe she had done them and told her to do them again (plus 10 more for balk talk) she did 20 more in 60 seconds and counted each...
after observing for a few more exercises the instructor started giving directions of the nature of: ok 20 sit-ups, Sarah do 80 instead....

after the warmup and basic exercises were done the instructor said ok we are going to have a "light workout today" heh heh lets run for thirty minutes at the best pace you can maintain around the 1/4 mile track everyone else groaned, but Sarah perked up.... when the instructor blew their whistle and yelled "GO!!" Sarah took off, running, after she finished her first lap when everyone else was just about to the first turn on the track, She decided to run in the outside track, and still ran 100 laps before the time was up. Sarah was panting a bit when they finished, of course most of the students had only ran about 2-5 miles in the time she ran 25.


Nicely done. Need to work on spelling and punctuation, though. Maybe run what you are going to put here through Word first.

taalismn wrote:"So how are you fitting in, Vice Principle Federoff?"
"Never thought self say this; miss frozen gulag. Miss being able to drink openly. Miss friends on eternal ice flow. Even miss loopy girl who run outside after shower and freeze solid."


:lol:

SRoss wrote:
taalismn wrote:"So how are you fitting in, Vice Principle Federoff?"
"Never thought self say this; miss frozen gulag. Miss being able to drink openly. Miss friends on eternal ice flow. Even miss loopy girl who run outside after shower and freeze solid."


You realize, if they are recruiting from the Ice Guard, Mauve Squadron doesn't have a hope of avoiding assignment here.


:lol:

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:
taalismn wrote:"So how are you fitting in, Vice Principle Federoff?"
"Never thought self say this; miss frozen gulag. Miss being able to drink openly. Miss friends on eternal ice flow. Even miss loopy girl who run outside after shower and freeze solid."


You realize, if they are recruiting from the Ice Guard, Mauve Squadron doesn't have a hope of avoiding assignment here.



I'm thinking Federoff is a one-shot; he's quietly drafted out of Ice Guard to spy on the Monument City/UEG educational system(it's yet another grundge job assigned to keep the old warhorse too busy to embarrass his superiors back in New Moscow, and it keeps the young KGB National Security Intelligence Bureau mooks entertained).
Eventually Federoff does manage to get back to Ice Guard for the Great Ice Guard TimeSkip(though, given the way're mixing and messing both time and space here, it's a toss-up if it ever really happens), incidentally accidentally bringing along a class or two of the kids on what is booked as a 'nature walk', and more elaborately as a 'field trip to see a glacier park', because frankly nobody(publically) knows about Ice Guard or where it is(frankly, though, some opf the parents who drop their kids off at MCHS #69 couldn't care less, and might actually breathe a sigh of relief if their kids disappear...they might even consider it ironically appropriate if their offspring wound up at a gulag meant to disappear undesirables*).

*This might be covered/legitimized in the MCHS #69 spin-off: "Summer Camp Frostbite".


:lol: :roll:
guardiandashi
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by guardiandashi »

After cleaning up after the PE period Sarah looked at her schedule again and noticed that it had "lunch: and an image of forks and other silverware. She checked with someone that seemed helpful, and they confirmed it said lunch. They were heading to lunch as well so Sarah tagged along, when Sarah got to the cafeteria she looked at the options and headed over to the meal line where she asked how many calories are in the standard meal for today? They looked it up and said with milk it comes to 850 cal. Sarah thought for a moment and looked at the options and at each station asked for four servings. when she walked over to a table she had 2 trays loaded up and about 3200 calories worth of food, which she proceeded to devour. Which gathered a few stares. After noting the prices for the prepared lunches she decided she should look into making and bringing a "sack lunch" to see if it might be cheaper. especially after she noticed that the meals were not as protein heavy as what she was used to.
After lunch she headed to the "home economics class" where most of the students were cooking. Sarah asked the instructor if that was all the ingredients available, and with the list of ingredients tossed together a stir fry.

after that class she went to the shop class and demonstrated that she at least understood the basics of wielding and cutting.
when she got to the "military class" they were working with guns where she was able to demonstrate that she knew the basics (snicker) Sarah asked what the range was rated for, and upon hearing she asked if it would be ok if she brought personal weapons to the next class and when that would be.
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Kargan3033
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

taalismn wrote:"So how are you fitting in, Vice Principle Federoff?"
"Never thought self say this; miss frozen gulag. Miss being able to drink openly. Miss friends on eternal ice flow. Even miss loopy girl who run outside after shower and freeze solid."

:lol:
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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Kargan3033
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:
taalismn wrote:"So how are you fitting in, Vice Principle Federoff?"
"Never thought self say this; miss frozen gulag. Miss being able to drink openly. Miss friends on eternal ice flow. Even miss loopy girl who run outside after shower and freeze solid."


You realize, if they are recruiting from the Ice Guard, Mauve Squadron doesn't have a hope of avoiding assignment here.



I'm thinking Federoff is a one-shot; he's quietly drafted out of Ice Guard to spy on the Monument City/UEG educational system(it's yet another grundge job assigned to keep the old warhorse too busy to embarrass his superiors back in New Moscow, and it keeps the young KGB National Security Intelligence Bureau mooks entertained).
Eventually Federoff does manage to get back to Ice Guard for the Great Ice Guard TimeSkip(though, given the way're mixing and messing both time and space here, it's a toss-up if it ever really happens), incidentally accidentally bringing along a class or two of the kids on what is booked as a 'nature walk', and more elaborately as a 'field trip to see a glacier park', because frankly nobody(publically) knows about Ice Guard or where it is(frankly, though, some opf the parents who drop their kids off at MCHS #69 couldn't care less, and might actually breathe a sigh of relief if their kids disappear...they might even consider it ironically appropriate if their offspring wound up at a gulag meant to disappear undesirables*).

*This might be covered/legitimized in the MCHS #69 spin-off: "Summer Camp Frostbite".


Heh!, no wonder why I like you, you have very fine ideas and a wicked sense of humor. :twisted:
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

I fortunately, never had to go to summer camp, and the few outings the Cub Scouts took were hardly 'roughing it', aside from one short brisk 2 mile walk in the middle of the night(which I hardly appreciated...really didn't get to SEE anything).

'Summer Camp Frostbite' could be a twin of 'Camp Permafrost' from the Miles Vokosigan series of books; Camp Permafrost is a Bayaran military training facility on a frozen island in the Bayaran homeworld's arctic. The troops assigned to cold weather combat training arrive in the SUMMER for four months, while the PERMANENT caretaker staff are essentially suck there killing themselves via alcohol or stupidity(one staff member,hiding a care package from home in a drainage pipe outside gets stuck and dies during a flash flood). It gets introduced in the early Miles books, and it becomes a brick joke later when by Emperor's fiat, a particularly obnoxious and meddlesome aristocratic twit gets assigned as laundry officer(the Vor are the Bayarans' military nobility) at CP, to keep him from making any more trouble.
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by guardiandashi »

taalismn wrote:I fortunately, never had to go to summer camp, and the few outings the Cub Scouts took were hardly 'roughing it', aside from one short brisk 2 mile walk in the middle of the night(which I hardly appreciated...really didn't get to SEE anything).

'Summer Camp Frostbite' could be a twin of 'Camp Permafrost' from the Miles Vokosigan series of books; Camp Permafrost is a Bayaran military training facility on a frozen island in the Bayaran homeworld's arctic. The troops assigned to cold weather combat training arrive in the SUMMER for four months, while the PERMANENT caretaker staff are essentially suck there killing themselves via alcohol or stupidity(one staff member,hiding a care package from home in a drainage pipe outside gets stuck and dies during a flash flood). It gets introduced in the early Miles books, and it becomes a brick joke later when by Emperor's fiat, a particularly obnoxious and meddlesome aristocratic twit gets assigned as laundry officer(the Vor are the Bayarans' military nobility) at CP, to keep him from making any more trouble.


heh I remember that one ... technically the Vor aren't military nobility but they are the planets nobility, and the planet is so militarized/uniformed that it can be hard to tell the difference.

the banishment happens in "a Civil Campaign" and miles visit to camp pf was in "The Vor Game" I believe along with Miles first court martial for what could be a capital crime.....

of course miles also basically lost a "scatcat" ... and other hijinks ensued.
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by SRoss »

(Reading Cub Scout Manual) "Ok class, today in Outdoor survival, we're going to learn to make plaster casts of animal foot prints. RELEASE THE MUTANT POLAR BEAR!!!"
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

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"And Rand will demonstrate the proper techinques for dealing with mutant polar bear after its been released without the use of stunt clones."
Rand: "Crap..."
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

guardiandashi wrote:[
heh I remember that one ... technically the Vor aren't military nobility but they are the planets nobility, and the planet is so militarized/uniformed that it can be hard to tell the difference.

.



I kinda got the impression that the Vor were like the knights or samurai, but with a Cossack-style element. Hereditary warrior caste who acquired political power by reward and force of arms during Barrayar's post-colonization Dark Ages, but that started eroding badly when the Cetagendans invaded, and the lower classes were fully armed, You could still advance up the ranks on merit, but it became easier if you were Vor, since that was where most of the wealth lay and the connections were.


As fpr Rand being an instructor at the Camp? Why not keep with the timeline and make him one of the inmates students? Hey, he had to learn Foraging SOMEWHERE...
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

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guardiandashi wrote:After cleaning up after the PE period Sarah looked at her schedule again and noticed that it had "lunch: and an image of forks and other silverware. She checked with someone that seemed helpful, and they confirmed it said lunch. They were heading to lunch as well so Sarah tagged along, when Sarah got to the cafeteria she looked at the options and headed over to the meal line where she asked how many calories are in the standard meal for today? They looked it up and said with milk it comes to 850 cal. Sarah thought for a moment and looked at the options and at each station asked for four servings. when she walked over to a table she had 2 trays loaded up and about 3200 calories worth of food, which she proceeded to devour. Which gathered a few stares. After noting the prices for the prepared lunches she decided she should look into making and bringing a "sack lunch" to see if it might be cheaper. especially after she noticed that the meals were not as protein heavy as what she was used to.
After lunch she headed to the "home economics class" where most of the students were cooking. Sarah asked the instructor if that was all the ingredients available, and with the list of ingredients tossed together a stir fry.

after that class she went to the shop class and demonstrated that she at least understood the basics of wielding and cutting.
when she got to the "military class" they were working with guns where she was able to demonstrate that she knew the basics (snicker) Sarah asked what the range was rated for, and upon hearing she asked if it would be ok if she brought personal weapons to the next class and when that would be.


:D This is going to be fun.

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:
taalismn wrote:"So how are you fitting in, Vice Principle Federoff?"
"Never thought self say this; miss frozen gulag. Miss being able to drink openly. Miss friends on eternal ice flow. Even miss loopy girl who run outside after shower and freeze solid."


You realize, if they are recruiting from the Ice Guard, Mauve Squadron doesn't have a hope of avoiding assignment here.



I'm thinking Federoff is a one-shot; he's quietly drafted out of Ice Guard to spy on the Monument City/UEG educational system(it's yet another grundge job assigned to keep the old warhorse too busy to embarrass his superiors back in New Moscow, and it keeps the young KGB National Security Intelligence Bureau mooks entertained).
Eventually Federoff does manage to get back to Ice Guard for the Great Ice Guard TimeSkip(though, given the way're mixing and messing both time and space here, it's a toss-up if it ever really happens), incidentally accidentally bringing along a class or two of the kids on what is booked as a 'nature walk', and more elaborately as a 'field trip to see a glacier park', because frankly nobody(publically) knows about Ice Guard or where it is(frankly, though, some opf the parents who drop their kids off at MCHS #69 couldn't care less, and might actually breathe a sigh of relief if their kids disappear...they might even consider it ironically appropriate if their offspring wound up at a gulag meant to disappear undesirables*).

*This might be covered/legitimized in the MCHS #69 spin-off: "Summer Camp Frostbite".


Heh!, no wonder why I like you, you have very fine ideas and a wicked sense of humor. :twisted:


That he does.

taalismn wrote:I fortunately, never had to go to summer camp, and the few outings the Cub Scouts took were hardly 'roughing it', aside from one short brisk 2 mile walk in the middle of the night(which I hardly appreciated...really didn't get to SEE anything).

'Summer Camp Frostbite' could be a twin of 'Camp Permafrost' from the Miles Vokosigan series of books; Camp Permafrost is a Bayaran military training facility on a frozen island in the Bayaran homeworld's arctic. The troops assigned to cold weather combat training arrive in the SUMMER for four months, while the PERMANENT caretaker staff are essentially suck there killing themselves via alcohol or stupidity(one staff member,hiding a care package from home in a drainage pipe outside gets stuck and dies during a flash flood). It gets introduced in the early Miles books, and it becomes a brick joke later when by Emperor's fiat, a particularly obnoxious and meddlesome aristocratic twit gets assigned as laundry officer(the Vor are the Bayarans' military nobility) at CP, to keep him from making any more trouble.


:frazz: Nope. Don't want to go there.

guardiandashi wrote:
taalismn wrote:I fortunately, never had to go to summer camp, and the few outings the Cub Scouts took were hardly 'roughing it', aside from one short brisk 2 mile walk in the middle of the night(which I hardly appreciated...really didn't get to SEE anything).

'Summer Camp Frostbite' could be a twin of 'Camp Permafrost' from the Miles Vokosigan series of books; Camp Permafrost is a Bayaran military training facility on a frozen island in the Bayaran homeworld's arctic. The troops assigned to cold weather combat training arrive in the SUMMER for four months, while the PERMANENT caretaker staff are essentially suck there killing themselves via alcohol or stupidity(one staff member,hiding a care package from home in a drainage pipe outside gets stuck and dies during a flash flood). It gets introduced in the early Miles books, and it becomes a brick joke later when by Emperor's fiat, a particularly obnoxious and meddlesome aristocratic twit gets assigned as laundry officer(the Vor are the Bayarans' military nobility) at CP, to keep him from making any more trouble.


heh I remember that one ... technically the Vor aren't military nobility but they are the planets nobility, and the planet is so militarized/uniformed that it can be hard to tell the difference.

the banishment happens in "a Civil Campaign" and miles visit to camp pf was in "The Vor Game" I believe along with Miles first court martial for what could be a capital crime.....

of course miles also basically lost a "scatcat" ... and other hijinks ensued.


Yep, really crazy.

SRoss wrote:(Reading Cub Scout Manual) "Ok class, today in Outdoor survival, we're going to learn to make plaster casts of animal foot prints. RELEASE THE MUTANT POLAR BEAR!!!"


:lol: :lol:

Arnie100 wrote:"And Rand will demonstrate the proper techinques for dealing with mutant polar bear after its been released without the use of stunt clones."
Rand: "Crap..."


:lol:

taalismn wrote:
guardiandashi wrote:[
heh I remember that one ... technically the Vor aren't military nobility but they are the planets nobility, and the planet is so militarized/uniformed that it can be hard to tell the difference.

.



I kinda got the impression that the Vor were like the knights or samurai, but with a Cossack-style element. Hereditary warrior caste who acquired political power by reward and force of arms during Barrayar's post-colonization Dark Ages, but that started eroding badly when the Cetagendans invaded, and the lower classes were fully armed, You could still advance up the ranks on merit, but it became easier if you were Vor, since that was where most of the wealth lay and the connections were.


As fpr Rand being an instructor at the Camp? Why not keep with the timeline and make him one of the inmates students? Hey, he had to learn Foraging SOMEWHERE...


:lol:
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

"Mister Wolfe, you are NOT allowed to bait your bear trap with your field partner! Release Mister Rand right this instant!"
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

taalismn wrote:I fortunately, never had to go to summer camp, and the few outings the Cub Scouts took were hardly 'roughing it', aside from one short brisk 2 mile walk in the middle of the night(which I hardly appreciated...really didn't get to SEE anything).

'Summer Camp Frostbite' could be a twin of 'Camp Permafrost' from the Miles Vokosigan series of books; Camp Permafrost is a Bayaran military training facility on a frozen island in the Bayaran homeworld's arctic. The troops assigned to cold weather combat training arrive in the SUMMER for four months, while the PERMANENT caretaker staff are essentially suck there killing themselves via alcohol or stupidity(one staff member,hiding a care package from home in a drainage pipe outside gets stuck and dies during a flash flood). It gets introduced in the early Miles books, and it becomes a brick joke later when by Emperor's fiat, a particularly obnoxious and meddlesome aristocratic twit gets assigned as laundry officer(the Vor are the Bayarans' military nobility) at CP, to keep him from making any more trouble.


Nice! I'll have to look up that series one of these days.
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by guardiandashi »

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:I fortunately, never had to go to summer camp, and the few outings the Cub Scouts took were hardly 'roughing it', aside from one short brisk 2 mile walk in the middle of the night(which I hardly appreciated...really didn't get to SEE anything).

'Summer Camp Frostbite' could be a twin of 'Camp Permafrost' from the Miles Vokosigan series of books; Camp Permafrost is a Bayaran military training facility on a frozen island in the Bayaran homeworld's arctic. The troops assigned to cold weather combat training arrive in the SUMMER for four months, while the PERMANENT caretaker staff are essentially suck there killing themselves via alcohol or stupidity(one staff member,hiding a care package from home in a drainage pipe outside gets stuck and dies during a flash flood). It gets introduced in the early Miles books, and it becomes a brick joke later when by Emperor's fiat, a particularly obnoxious and meddlesome aristocratic twit gets assigned as laundry officer(the Vor are the Bayarans' military nobility) at CP, to keep him from making any more trouble.


Nice! I'll have to look up that series one of these days.


this might help
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miles_Vorkosigan
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

guardiandashi wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:I fortunately, never had to go to summer camp, and the few outings the Cub Scouts took were hardly 'roughing it', aside from one short brisk 2 mile walk in the middle of the night(which I hardly appreciated...really didn't get to SEE anything).

'Summer Camp Frostbite' could be a twin of 'Camp Permafrost' from the Miles Vokosigan series of books; Camp Permafrost is a Bayaran military training facility on a frozen island in the Bayaran homeworld's arctic. The troops assigned to cold weather combat training arrive in the SUMMER for four months, while the PERMANENT caretaker staff are essentially suck there killing themselves via alcohol or stupidity(one staff member,hiding a care package from home in a drainage pipe outside gets stuck and dies during a flash flood). It gets introduced in the early Miles books, and it becomes a brick joke later when by Emperor's fiat, a particularly obnoxious and meddlesome aristocratic twit gets assigned as laundry officer(the Vor are the Bayarans' military nobility) at CP, to keep him from making any more trouble.


Nice! I'll have to look up that series one of these days.


this might help
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miles_Vorkosigan


Thank you for the info, this series sounds like it is worth reading.
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

As the rest of the students of MCH #69 were going from one class to the next with a certain amount of trepidation and a fair amount of loathing one student was enjoying is time as a student of MCH #69.

Steve Jackson: " Alright!, now this is what I'm talking about! " he thinks to himself as he walks into the automotives classroom and sees that there are a few students and one elderly looking teacher.

Mr.Ted Hall(automotives teacher): " Ok class today we'll be doing something different from last year's classes, you will brake into teams of three and you will take one of spare M499 GPVs that have been *donated* to our school and improve them, you will have three weeks to make the improvements. " he says to the students as he points to the *Donated* M499 GPVs that look like they had been cobbled together from parts found in a junkyard.

Steve Jackson: " Excuse me Teacher but I don't need anyone else, they'll just get my way. " he says to Mr.Hall who gives him the a question and slight annoyed look at the young man's arrogant attitude and disrespect for the structuring of the lesson.

Mr.Hall: " Young Man, you will do the lesson the way it is meant to be done, I doubt a snot nosed brat like you could do the lesson in the time allotted on your own without cheating. " he says to Steve who is giving him a cocky look as the rest of the students are watching the verbal sparing between Steve and the teacher with a great deal of interest.

Steve Jackson: " Bulls**t!, you pencil pushing desk jockeys think you know what's best for us students but you don't! " he says to Mr.Hall with an annoyed tone of voice and a slightly manic gleam in his eyes that catches Mr.Hall's interest.

Mr.Hall: " Oh really now, would you care to make a bet? " he asks Steve who is smiling from ear to ear.

Steve Jackson: " Oh really?, what did you have in mind? " he says to Mr.Hall with a flippant attitude

Mr.Hall: " Not only will I bet you 250 credits but if you fail to make any significant improvements to the vehicle I'll assign you, you automatically fail the class, if you can improve the vehicle I'll assign you, you not only 250 credits from me but you automatically pass the class. " he says to Steve with a snide tone of voice as he figures that the 250 credits are as good as his.

Steve Jackson: " CHALLENGE ACCEPTED! " :D

Mr.Hall: " Very well Young Man this will be your vehicle. " he says to Steve as he points to a rusted out, broken down M499 GPV that looks like it should have been melted down many years ago.

* Three weeks later *

Mr.Hall: " Well class it looks like Mr.Jackson was all talk and no action. " he says to the rest of the students as he is inspecting the M499 GPVs that had been asigned to them when they hear what sounds like thunder in the distance despite it been a cloudless day.

* ROAR, SCREECH! *

Mr.Hall :eek: , the rest of the class :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: as they see a nightmarish mass of metal, rubber, armor plating and enough weapons to have taken on the entire Zentraedi fleet juring the last battle of the First Robotech War and win that is painted black with red flames.

Steve Jackson: " Am I late? " he asks as he climbs out of the monster of metal, rubber and guns of his own making

Mr.Hall: " That...that is..."

Steve Jackson: " You're right it needs more guns, after all the right of way goes to the biggest guns on the road! " :twisted: 8)

* A bag of assorted internet cookies to anyone who gets the joke. *
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by SRoss »

Car Wars?
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Arnie100 »

Mad Max: "This sounds like it could be fun..."
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:I fortunately, never had to go to summer camp, and the few outings the Cub Scouts took were hardly 'roughing it', aside from one short brisk 2 mile walk in the middle of the night(which I hardly appreciated...really didn't get to SEE anything).

'Summer Camp Frostbite' could be a twin of 'Camp Permafrost' from the Miles Vokosigan series of books; Camp Permafrost is a Bayaran military training facility on a frozen island in the Bayaran homeworld's arctic. The troops assigned to cold weather combat training arrive in the SUMMER for four months, while the PERMANENT caretaker staff are essentially suck there killing themselves via alcohol or stupidity(one staff member,hiding a care package from home in a drainage pipe outside gets stuck and dies during a flash flood). It gets introduced in the early Miles books, and it becomes a brick joke later when by Emperor's fiat, a particularly obnoxious and meddlesome aristocratic twit gets assigned as laundry officer(the Vor are the Bayarans' military nobility) at CP, to keep him from making any more trouble.


Nice! I'll have to look up that series one of these days.


Lois McMaster Bujold writes amazingly good sci-fi space opera-lite, and her characterizations come off very fine as well. Though some parts of her stories read like period romances, they're actually quite believable, and while the nominal prequel to the series where Miles' parents meet is formulaic Starcrossed Lovers in Space, it does turn dark when the Barrayaran Civil War breaks out.
Plus as romantic leading men go, Miles himself is anything but typical; he's Prince Charming, but he's a dwarf with fragile bones(in a xenophobic neofuedal society that is decidedly unforgiving of mutations) and a manic-depressive urge to prove himself. His cousin perhaps fits the Prince Charming mold better, but has to contend wit his mother constantly poking her nose into his personal affairs.
Other stories in Lois McMaster Bujold's also play with the period romance schtick, including love with genetically engineered space workers, and a quest involving one of Miles' flames and a man from an all-male society seeking the genetic material needed to keep his society going.
And it gets quite funny too.
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

Arnie100 wrote:Mad Max: "This sounds like it could be fun..."


"You have a Herkimer battle-jitney?! Why didn't you tell me you had a Herkimer battle-jitney?!"
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Alpha 11 »

taalismn wrote:"Mister Wolfe, you are NOT allowed to bait your bear trap with your field partner! Release Mister Rand right this instant!"


:lol: :lol:

Kargan3033 wrote:As the rest of the students of MCH #69 were going from one class to the next with a certain amount of trepidation and a fair amount of loathing one student was enjoying is time as a student of MCH #69.

Steve Jackson: " Alright!, now this is what I'm talking about! " he thinks to himself as he walks into the automotives classroom and sees that there are a few students and one elderly looking teacher.

Mr.Ted Hall(automotives teacher): " Ok class today we'll be doing something different from last year's classes, you will brake into teams of three and you will take one of spare M499 GPVs that have been *donated* to our school and improve them, you will have three weeks to make the improvements. " he says to the students as he points to the *Donated* M499 GPVs that look like they had been cobbled together from parts found in a junkyard.

Steve Jackson: " Excuse me Teacher but I don't need anyone else, they'll just get my way. " he says to Mr.Hall who gives him the a question and slight annoyed look at the young man's arrogant attitude and disrespect for the structuring of the lesson.

Mr.Hall: " Young Man, you will do the lesson the way it is meant to be done, I doubt a snot nosed brat like you could do the lesson in the time allotted on your own without cheating. " he says to Steve who is giving him a cocky look as the rest of the students are watching the verbal sparing between Steve and the teacher with a great deal of interest.

Steve Jackson: " Bulls**t!, you pencil pushing desk jockeys think you know what's best for us students but you don't! " he says to Mr.Hall with an annoyed tone of voice and a slightly manic gleam in his eyes that catches Mr.Hall's interest.

Mr.Hall: " Oh really now, would you care to make a bet? " he asks Steve who is smiling from ear to ear.

Steve Jackson: " Oh really?, what did you have in mind? " he says to Mr.Hall with a flippant attitude

Mr.Hall: " Not only will I bet you 250 credits but if you fail to make any significant improvements to the vehicle I'll assign you, you automatically fail the class, if you can improve the vehicle I'll assign you, you not only 250 credits from me but you automatically pass the class. " he says to Steve with a snide tone of voice as he figures that the 250 credits are as good as his.

Steve Jackson: " CHALLENGE ACCEPTED! " :D

Mr.Hall: " Very well Young Man this will be your vehicle. " he says to Steve as he points to a rusted out, broken down M499 GPV that looks like it should have been melted down many years ago.

* Three weeks later *

Mr.Hall: " Well class it looks like Mr.Jackson was all talk and no action. " he says to the rest of the students as he is inspecting the M499 GPVs that had been asigned to them when they hear what sounds like thunder in the distance despite it been a cloudless day.

* ROAR, SCREECH! *

Mr.Hall :eek: , the rest of the class :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: as they see a nightmarish mass of metal, rubber, armor plating and enough weapons to have taken on the entire Zentraedi fleet juring the last battle of the First Robotech War and win that is painted black with red flames.

Steve Jackson: " Am I late? " he asks as he climbs out of the monster of metal, rubber and guns of his own making

Mr.Hall: " That...that is..."

Steve Jackson: " You're right it needs more guns, after all the right of way goes to the biggest guns on the road! " :twisted: 8)

* A bag of assorted internet cookies to anyone who gets the joke. *


:lol: I think I might know what it is, but can't remember the name.

Arnie100 wrote:Mad Max: "This sounds like it could be fun..."


:lol:

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:I fortunately, never had to go to summer camp, and the few outings the Cub Scouts took were hardly 'roughing it', aside from one short brisk 2 mile walk in the middle of the night(which I hardly appreciated...really didn't get to SEE anything).

'Summer Camp Frostbite' could be a twin of 'Camp Permafrost' from the Miles Vokosigan series of books; Camp Permafrost is a Bayaran military training facility on a frozen island in the Bayaran homeworld's arctic. The troops assigned to cold weather combat training arrive in the SUMMER for four months, while the PERMANENT caretaker staff are essentially suck there killing themselves via alcohol or stupidity(one staff member,hiding a care package from home in a drainage pipe outside gets stuck and dies during a flash flood). It gets introduced in the early Miles books, and it becomes a brick joke later when by Emperor's fiat, a particularly obnoxious and meddlesome aristocratic twit gets assigned as laundry officer(the Vor are the Bayarans' military nobility) at CP, to keep him from making any more trouble.


Nice! I'll have to look up that series one of these days.


Lois McMaster Bujold writes amazingly good sci-fi space opera-lite, and her characterizations come off very fine as well. Though some parts of her stories read like period romances, they're actually quite believable, and while the nominal prequel to the series where Miles' parents meet is formulaic Starcrossed Lovers in Space, it does turn dark when the Barrayaran Civil War breaks out.
Plus as romantic leading men go, Miles himself is anything but typical; he's Prince Charming, but he's a dwarf with fragile bones(in a xenophobic neofuedal society that is decidedly unforgiving of mutations) and a manic-depressive urge to prove himself. His cousin perhaps fits the Prince Charming mold better, but has to contend wit his mother constantly poking her nose into his personal affairs.
Other stories in Lois McMaster Bujold's also play with the period romance schtick, including love with genetically engineered space workers, and a quest involving one of Miles' flames and a man from an all-male society seeking the genetic material needed to keep his society going.
And it gets quite funny too.


Might have to look into it myself.

taalismn wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:Mad Max: "This sounds like it could be fun..."


"You have a Herkimer battle-jitney?! Why didn't you tell me you had a Herkimer battle-jitney?!"


:lol:
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

SRoss wrote:Car Wars?


Bingo!

Here's your bag of assorted internet cookies.
*Hands SRoss a ten ton bag of assorted internet cookies* :D
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:I fortunately, never had to go to summer camp, and the few outings the Cub Scouts took were hardly 'roughing it', aside from one short brisk 2 mile walk in the middle of the night(which I hardly appreciated...really didn't get to SEE anything).

'Summer Camp Frostbite' could be a twin of 'Camp Permafrost' from the Miles Vokosigan series of books; Camp Permafrost is a Bayaran military training facility on a frozen island in the Bayaran homeworld's arctic. The troops assigned to cold weather combat training arrive in the SUMMER for four months, while the PERMANENT caretaker staff are essentially suck there killing themselves via alcohol or stupidity(one staff member,hiding a care package from home in a drainage pipe outside gets stuck and dies during a flash flood). It gets introduced in the early Miles books, and it becomes a brick joke later when by Emperor's fiat, a particularly obnoxious and meddlesome aristocratic twit gets assigned as laundry officer(the Vor are the Bayarans' military nobility) at CP, to keep him from making any more trouble.


Nice! I'll have to look up that series one of these days.


Lois McMaster Bujold writes amazingly good sci-fi space opera-lite, and her characterizations come off very fine as well. Though some parts of her stories read like period romances, they're actually quite believable, and while the nominal prequel to the series where Miles' parents meet is formulaic Starcrossed Lovers in Space, it does turn dark when the Barrayaran Civil War breaks out.
Plus as romantic leading men go, Miles himself is anything but typical; he's Prince Charming, but he's a dwarf with fragile bones(in a xenophobic neofuedal society that is decidedly unforgiving of mutations) and a manic-depressive urge to prove himself. His cousin perhaps fits the Prince Charming mold better, but has to contend wit his mother constantly poking her nose into his personal affairs.
Other stories in Lois McMaster Bujold's also play with the period romance schtick, including love with genetically engineered space workers, and a quest involving one of Miles' flames and a man from an all-male society seeking the genetic material needed to keep his society going.
And it gets quite funny too.


Thanks for the info, sounds like Lois is one of the better women writers out there, is Summer Camp Frostbite still in print?
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

Kargan3033 wrote:[

Thanks for the info, sounds like Lois is one of the better women writers out there, is Summer Camp Frostbite still in print?


'Summer Camp Frostbite' was my name for MCHS # 69's summer camp. It's marginally preferable to "Camp Lu-lah-Duga", which translates from an dead Central American tribal language(taught only by certain long-lived parrots) into "Malarial Swamp'.
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by SRoss »

Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:Car Wars?


Bingo!

Here's your bag of assorted internet cookies.
*Hands SRoss a ten ton bag of assorted internet cookies* :D


"Mmmm ... Minty." :fl:
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:[

Thanks for the info, sounds like Lois is one of the better women writers out there, is Summer Camp Frostbite still in print?


'Summer Camp Frostbite' was my name for MCHS # 69's summer camp. It's marginally preferable to "Camp Lu-lah-Duga", which translates from an dead Central American tribal language(taught only by certain long-lived parrots) into "Malarial Swamp'.


LOL sorry about that I was half asleep when I made that post, I had gotten up about fifteen minutes before I mad that post after a long sleepless night.
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

SRoss wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:Car Wars?


Bingo!

Here's your bag of assorted internet cookies.
*Hands SRoss a ten ton bag of assorted internet cookies* :D


"Mmmm ... Minty." :fl:


Umm you know the Regess baked them from her own recipe right? :shock:
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by SRoss »

Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:Car Wars?


Bingo!

Here's your bag of assorted internet cookies.
*Hands SRoss a ten ton bag of assorted internet cookies* :D


"Mmmm ... Minty." :fl:


Umm you know the Regess baked them from her own recipe right? :shock:


SRoss: :shock: "Excuse me a moment." (Goes to School Custodian's room.)
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

SRoss wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:Car Wars?


Bingo!

Here's your bag of assorted internet cookies.
*Hands SRoss a ten ton bag of assorted internet cookies* :D


"Mmmm ... Minty." :fl:


Umm you know the Regess baked them from her own recipe right? :shock:


SRoss: :shock: "Excuse me a moment." (Goes to School Custodian's room.)


:lol:

At lest the Regess is not baking cookies for the GMP scout girls :eek:
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

Kargan3033 wrote:[At lest the Regess is not baking cookies for the GMP scout girls :eek:



#WHAMF!#
The next thing you know after your front door explodes is the sensation of your back hurting, a burnt smell in your nostrils, a weight on your chest and something cold and hard pressed into the side of your head.

From above you comes the singsong voice of an adolescent female, sugar sweetness laid over cold steel.


"Hi! GMP Girl Scouts! We're having a cookie and confession sweep in your neighborhood! Would you either care to 'fess up to anything you did illegal and get a reduced sentence, or would you like to buy some cookies?"
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:[At lest the Regess is not baking cookies for the GMP scout girls :eek:



#WHAMF!#
The next thing you know after your front door explodes is the sensation of your back hurting, a burnt smell in your nostrils, a weight on your chest and something cold and hard pressed into the side of your head.

From above you comes the singsong voice of an adolescent female, sugar sweetness laid over cold steel.


"Hi! GMP Girl Scouts! We're having a cookie and confession sweep in your neighborhood! Would you either care to 'fess up to anything you did illegal and get a reduced sentence, or would you like to buy some cookies?"

:eek: :? :lol:

That's as funny as Zentraedi marriage counselors. :mrgreen:
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Arnie100 »

Arnie100: :shock: "I'll take a dozen bags of cookies!"
GMP Girl Scouts: "Such a nice man!" :love: :ok:
They can't see me...Right!?
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

And if you buy the cookies, it actually can be more expensive than posting bail....But ordering a hundred boxes of Undercover Chocolate Wafers doesn't have the possibility of 7-12 years* in prison at the end of trial. Nor does paying for fifty boxes of Nuclear Wintermints carry the chance of being shipped off to Ice Guard**.

(*Capital crimes just get you shot)

(** If you're military. Civilians get sent to nice tundra workcamps further south)
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Alpha 11 »

Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:Car Wars?


Bingo!

Here's your bag of assorted internet cookies.
*Hands SRoss a ten ton bag of assorted internet cookies* :D


:lol: :lol:

SRoss wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:Car Wars?


Bingo!

Here's your bag of assorted internet cookies.
*Hands SRoss a ten ton bag of assorted internet cookies* :D


"Mmmm ... Minty." :fl:


:lol:

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:[

Thanks for the info, sounds like Lois is one of the better women writers out there, is Summer Camp Frostbite still in print?


'Summer Camp Frostbite' was my name for MCHS # 69's summer camp. It's marginally preferable to "Camp Lu-lah-Duga", which translates from an dead Central American tribal language(taught only by certain long-lived parrots) into "Malarial Swamp'.


LOL sorry about that I was half asleep when I made that post, I had gotten up about fifteen minutes before I mad that post after a long sleepless night.


Sorry to hear that, try to get to bed earlier the next night if at all possible.

Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:Car Wars?


Bingo!

Here's your bag of assorted internet cookies.
*Hands SRoss a ten ton bag of assorted internet cookies* :D


"Mmmm ... Minty." :fl:


Umm you know the Regess baked them from her own recipe right? :shock:


:lol: :lol: :eek: :shock:

SRoss wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:Car Wars?


Bingo!

Here's your bag of assorted internet cookies.
*Hands SRoss a ten ton bag of assorted internet cookies* :D


"Mmmm ... Minty." :fl:


Umm you know the Regess baked them from her own recipe right? :shock:


SRoss: :shock: "Excuse me a moment." (Goes to School Custodian's room.)


:lol: :lol:
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Alpha 11 »

Kargan3033 wrote:

At lest the Regess is not baking cookies for the GMP scout girls :eek:


:lol:

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:[At lest the Regess is not baking cookies for the GMP scout girls :eek:



#WHAMF!#
The next thing you know after your front door explodes is the sensation of your back hurting, a burnt smell in your nostrils, a weight on your chest and something cold and hard pressed into the side of your head.

From above you comes the singsong voice of an adolescent female, sugar sweetness laid over cold steel.


"Hi! GMP Girl Scouts! We're having a cookie and confession sweep in your neighborhood! Would you either care to 'fess up to anything you did illegal and get a reduced sentence, or would you like to buy some cookies?"


:lol: :lol: :lol:

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:[At lest the Regess is not baking cookies for the GMP scout girls :eek:



#WHAMF!#
The next thing you know after your front door explodes is the sensation of your back hurting, a burnt smell in your nostrils, a weight on your chest and something cold and hard pressed into the side of your head.

From above you comes the singsong voice of an adolescent female, sugar sweetness laid over cold steel.


"Hi! GMP Girl Scouts! We're having a cookie and confession sweep in your neighborhood! Would you either care to 'fess up to anything you did illegal and get a reduced sentence, or would you like to buy some cookies?"

:eek: :? :lol:

That's as funny as Zentraedi marriage counselors. :mrgreen:


:lol:

Arnie100 wrote:Arnie100: :shock: "I'll take a dozen bags of cookies!"
GMP Girl Scouts: "Such a nice man!" :love: :ok:


:lol: :lol:

taalismn wrote:And if you buy the cookies, it actually can be more expensive than posting bail....But ordering a hundred boxes of Undercover Chocolate Wafers doesn't have the possibility of 7-12 years* in prison at the end of trial. Nor does paying for fifty boxes of Nuclear Wintermints carry the chance of being shipped off to Ice Guard**.

(*Capital crimes just get you shot)

(** If you're military. Civilians get sent to nice tundra workcamps further south)


:lol:
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:[At lest the Regess is not baking cookies for the GMP scout girls :eek:



#WHAMF!#
The next thing you know after your front door explodes is the sensation of your back hurting, a burnt smell in your nostrils, a weight on your chest and something cold and hard pressed into the side of your head.

From above you comes the singsong voice of an adolescent female, sugar sweetness laid over cold steel.


"Hi! GMP Girl Scouts! We're having a cookie and confession sweep in your neighborhood! Would you either care to 'fess up to anything you did illegal and get a reduced sentence, or would you like to buy some cookies?"


Also another popular snack item in Monument City is the Desert Division scout boys's camel jerky(mutant or otherwise). :D

It would seem to me that the DD Scout Boys and GMP Scout Girls learned the fine art of salesmanship from from Honest Ed the zentraedi used cars/mecha salesman.
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

In a meeting of the heads of the UEG it was decided that in order to up the population of Monument City that each secondary school would institute the Pre-Rain tradition of students giving out Valentine's day cards.

*Khyron who had been stalking...er *observing* the object of his *affections* walks up to Minimei and hands her a simple piece of folded thin white cardboard*

Minmei:" Why thank you! " she gushes with girlish glee and unfolds the card given to her.

" Your meaty skull is lovely to me, BE MY valentines "

Minmei: :shock: :oops:
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by SRoss »

Happy with himself, Kyron failed to notice the snare in front of his locker.

#SNAP!#


Hanging by his ankle, Kyron watched Sammie approach and hand him a card.
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by SRoss »

Corg walked the halls confused about why the Humans placed suck importance in the giving of cheep paper cards and candy. Annie, who'd been stalk ... er, following him, came up and placed a card in his hands.

Corg: (Unfolding the card to read it) "Um ... Thanks?"

"Hi Loverboy! Just a heads up. I laced this card with a fast-acting paralytic..."


Corg: :eek: :?
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

Edwards: "Ewwww...parcel post on Valentine's Day! A heart-shaped box of chocolates...of course it's attached to the front of a claymore mi- :shock:
#BOOM#

Lisa: "7279..."
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Alpha 11 »

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:[At lest the Regess is not baking cookies for the GMP scout girls :eek:



#WHAMF!#
The next thing you know after your front door explodes is the sensation of your back hurting, a burnt smell in your nostrils, a weight on your chest and something cold and hard pressed into the side of your head.

From above you comes the singsong voice of an adolescent female, sugar sweetness laid over cold steel.


"Hi! GMP Girl Scouts! We're having a cookie and confession sweep in your neighborhood! Would you either care to 'fess up to anything you did illegal and get a reduced sentence, or would you like to buy some cookies?"


Also another popular snack item in Monument City is the Desert Division scout boys's camel jerky(mutant or otherwise). :D

It would seem to me that the DD Scout Boys and GMP Scout Girls learned the fine art of salesmanship from from Honest Ed the zentraedi used cars/mecha salesman.


:lol: :lol:

Kargan3033 wrote:In a meeting of the heads of the UEG it was decided that in order to up the population of Monument City that each secondary school would institute the Pre-Rain tradition of students giving out Valentine's day cards.

*Khyron who had been stalking...er *observing* the object of his *affections* walks up to Minimei and hands her a simple piece of folded thin white cardboard*

Minmei:" Why thank you! " she gushes with girlish glee and unfolds the card given to her.

" Your meaty skull is lovely to me, BE MY valentines "

Minmei: :shock: :oops:


:lol: :lol:

SRoss wrote:Happy with himself, Kyron failed to notice the snare in front of his locker.

#SNAP!#


Hanging by his ankle, Kyron watched Sammie approach and hand him a card.


:lol:

SRoss wrote:Corg walked the halls confused about why the Humans placed suck importance in the giving of cheep paper cards and candy. Annie, who'd been stalk ... er, following him, came up and placed a card in his hands.

Corg: (Unfolding the card to read it) "Um ... Thanks?"

"Hi Loverboy! Just a heads up. I laced this card with a fast-acting paralytic..."


Corg: :eek: :?


:lol: :lol: :lol:

taalismn wrote:Edwards: "Ewwww...parcel post on Valentine's Day! A heart-shaped box of chocolates...of course it's attached to the front of a claymore mi- :shock:
#BOOM#

Lisa: "7279..."


:lol:
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by guardiandashi »

Sarah went and got a couple MDC cases and stuck her C-18 pistol in one and her CP-40 pulse laser rifle in the other, and encoded the locks to her retinal prints. she put the eclips in the bottom of her backpack.

In order to keep her sanity during the first three classes of the day, and keep her energy levels sort of under control she always walked (run) to school, usually including a 25-50 mile daily run on her "own time" to stay in shape.

Upon arriving she took the locked cases and took them to the ROTC center and checked them in and secured the cases choosing to not give actual descriptions of what was in the cases other than. Rifle, energy serial number CA1475384655cp40 and pistol energy serial number CA54566737544c18 or whatever the numbers actually were. she made sure they were secured before heading to class.

Sarah was actually advancing really quickly in her reading (IQ of 28 helps a lot) and total recall psionic power.

Sarah has deliberately avoided getting in any physical confrontations although She will not respond well to anyone trying to assert dominance over her, she usually keeps it to staring contests and the like. of course some of her issues that way would likely abruptly disappear the first time she actually starts lifting weights at her actual level.
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by keir451 »

guardiandashi wrote:Sarah went and got a couple MDC cases and stuck her C-18 pistol in one and her CP-40 pulse laser rifle in the other, and encoded the locks to her retinal prints. she put the eclips in the bottom of her backpack.

In order to keep her sanity during the first three classes of the day, and keep her energy levels sort of under control she always walked (run) to school, usually including a 25-50 mile daily run on her "own time" to stay in shape.

Upon arriving she took the locked cases and took them to the ROTC center and checked them in and secured the cases choosing to not give actual descriptions of what was in the cases other than. Rifle, energy serial number CA1475384655cp40 and pistol energy serial number CA54566737544c18 or whatever the numbers actually were. she made sure they were secured before heading to class.

Sarah was actually advancing really quickly in her reading (IQ of 28 helps a lot) and total recall psionic power.

Sarah has deliberately avoided getting in any physical confrontations although She will not respond well to anyone trying to assert dominance over her, she usually keeps it to staring contests and the like. of course some of her issues that way would likely abruptly disappear the first time she actually starts lifting weights at her actual level.

:twisted: :lol: Too bad she doesn't have a CS plasma rifle, too.
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by guardiandashi »

keir451 wrote:
guardiandashi wrote:Sarah went and got a couple MDC cases and stuck her C-18 pistol in one and her CP-40 pulse laser rifle in the other, and encoded the locks to her retinal prints. she put the eclips in the bottom of her backpack.

In order to keep her sanity during the first three classes of the day, and keep her energy levels sort of under control she always walked (run) to school, usually including a 25-50 mile daily run on her "own time" to stay in shape.

Upon arriving she took the locked cases and took them to the ROTC center and checked them in and secured the cases choosing to not give actual descriptions of what was in the cases other than. Rifle, energy serial number CA1475384655cp40 and pistol energy serial number CA54566737544c18 or whatever the numbers actually were. she made sure they were secured before heading to class.

Sarah was actually advancing really quickly in her reading (IQ of 28 helps a lot) and total recall psionic power.

Sarah has deliberately avoided getting in any physical confrontations although She will not respond well to anyone trying to assert dominance over her, she usually keeps it to staring contests and the like. of course some of her issues that way would likely abruptly disappear the first time she actually starts lifting weights at her actual level.

:twisted: :lol: Too bad she doesn't have a CS plasma rifle, too.


well actually I was talking to my friend last night (usually was the GM) and he mentioned some guns that are pretty good.
the 2 that I thought would be good for a 7ft character dogboy would be either a CTT-P40, or CTT-M20 IF they were able to get their hands on them. for this char a C-29 would be a Light weapon by weight and or encumbrance, the Other gun that I didn't remember ever seeing is a NG-P7 Northern gun Particle Beam Rifle, which is actually pretty good if relatively short range.
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