Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

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Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

Monument City High school #69

Dieter Fredericks the principle of Monument City High school #69 was reading over the list students for the first day of the new school year and saw that there were some new transfer students that would be attending classes at MCH#69.

" Hmm I don't think I will have any trouble with these new students. " he thought to himself since he was a crack veteran of the Monument City's education system as he absent mindly twirled his riding crop in his right hand.

" Yes I think today is going to be a good day indeed. " he thought to himself as he put his righting crop down on his desk as he took up his mug of coffee and took a long drink of of while he waited for the school day to start.

Dana Sterling let out a disgusted sigh as she adjusted her school uniform’s skirt that was riding high.

" Damn it why did I have to end up here in this high school, I asked Dad and Mom if they would enroll me in the Fairlight Academy, I mean it's not like we can't afford it with Dad and Mom being war heroes and what not. " she groused to herself as she took notice of a girl who was about her age with long black hair as she was kissing a boy.

" Damn, when am I going to find a boyfriend? " she asked herself as she started to get slightly *flustered* as the girl and boy continued to swap spit.

After making her way into the school and over to her locker Dana noticed a strangely familiar girl who was playing kissy face with a boy.

" Nah it couldn’t be her...could it? " she asked herself as she looked the raven haired girl over and was not to sure if it have been the raven haired girl she had seen kissing a different boy when she walked onto the school grounds.

" Um excuse me Miss.. " she heard some say from behind her and when she turned around she found herself face to face with a tall, good looking boy with had a slightly troubled look on his youthful and handsome face. "

" SQUEEE! " Dana squealed as she felt very aroused as she saw that the nameless boy who had sooken to her was not only tall but fit looking as she felt her face flush a deep crimson.

" Ummm Miss are you ok? " to breath taking hansom boy as Dana saw a slightly flushed look on his handsome face.

" YES!, I'm fine, really! " Dana stammered as she was giving the nameless boy more then the once over as she was mentally striping him naked in her lust fevered mind.

" Umm my name is Zor and well I'm new here and I'm looking for Classroom 69 and I...... Are you sure your ok? " Zor asked the strange blond haired girl who was giving him a slightly ravenous look that made him very uncomfortable for some strange reason.

" Well it just so happens that is the classroom I'm going to. " Dana said with a clearly aroused tone of voice as she latched onto Zor's right arm.
" I'm Dana by the way, Dana Sterling. " she added as she felt the need to stake her claim on Zor as her mind was flashing her an erotic slide show of her and Zor *studying* together in her bedroom.

" I see. " Zor said as he found himself slightly disturbed but also pleased by this strange turn of events as he and Dana started to make their way to their first class together.

" What the hell? " Dana muttered to herself as she saw the same black haired girl that she had seen twice before *acoustic* a short girl.
" Wow Nova is really playing the field today and it's only the first day of school. " I know, what a slut she is. " Dana and Zor hear two girls say out loud as they passed the raven haired girl who was name Nova as she was trying to scrap the poor girl she was acoustic pancreas clean with her tongue.

When the two of them entered Classroom 69, both Zor and Dana looked around the half full classroom as Nova walked passed them after giving them both more then the once over and when they looked around the classroom Dana and Zor saw tall, muscular boy with long blue hair and blue eyes sitting at his desk with a hateful, almost homicidal sneer on his face.

Next they saw a short, small breasted girl with short wavy, light lime green hair and blood red eyes sitting next to the scowling boy who was looking at a person with long light lavender hair who they could not determine to be a boy or a girl with a dreamy look on her face.

As they looked around the classroom both Zor and Dana saw two open desks side by side at the front of the class with three girls sitting off to the right of the two open desks and could have sworn they were triplets save for the fact that one of the three girls had long light blue hair while the other two girls had long dark green hair.

Once they were seated Dana and Zor saw that the women standing behind the teacher’s desk was a short old women who looked like she had been an old hag well before the First Robotech War.

" Class settle down now! " the old hag said with a dedicated tone of voice that was much like long finger nails on a chalkboard.

" Today's lesson will be on Sex Education. " they heard the practically mummified teacher say with a clearly leering smile on her leathery lips that just about made everyone in the classroom toss their cookies of the extra chunky kind as they were mentally scared for life by the sickeningly erotic mental images of the semi undead teacher in a black, spiked leather S&M costume complete with a long, thick black leather bullwhip.

Ok folks this thread is meant to be an open thread like Robotech Bloopers/Robotech Crossover threads, meaning that anyone can add to this thread using characters from not only the Robotech anime and both the first and second edition Robotech games but you can also add characters of other Palladium games or other animes/SF shows so long as it's in a high school/everyday life type setting.

The *action* need not just be at the high school nor are the characters you would add to this thread need to be just high school students/teacher/maintenance staff.

Note this open thread is just for fun nothing serious.

Here's a few ideas to help get you started.
The Awareness as a machine shop/computer sciences teacher.
The Regess as the school nurse/lunch lady
The Regent/Anatole Leonard as gym/PE teachers.
T.R. Edwards as the school counsellor/political sciences teacher
The school mascot could a Pollinator*rabid or not*

I hope you all got a laugh out of this and will add to it, let your imagination run free and most of all have fun.
Last edited by Kargan3033 on Mon Aug 04, 2014 9:22 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

Need some spellchecking there, old egg, but otherwise it looks like a promising dig at the recently croaked Robotech Academy. :D :bandit: :clown:
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

taalismn wrote:Need some spellchecking there, old egg, but otherwise it looks like a promising dig at the recently croaked Robotech Academy. :D :bandit: :clown:

Strange I am using Open Office and I ran this through it's spell checker and it did not show any spelling errors?

Robotech Academy?, I don't think I have seen that but all in all this humor tread was inspired by the Robotech Bloopers/Robotech Crossover threads in this sub forum, I'm hoping you and everyone else here will have fun with it.
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Need some spellchecking there, old egg, but otherwise it looks like a promising dig at the recently croaked Robotech Academy. :D :bandit: :clown:

Strange I am using Open Office and I ran this through it's spell checker and it did not show any spelling errors?

Robotech Academy?, I don't think I have seen that but all in all this humor tread was inspired by the Robotech Bloopers/Robotech Crossover threads in this sub forum, I'm hoping you and everyone else here will have fun with it.



Reference was to the recently de-Kickstarted Robotech Academy project with much controversy as to intended viewer demographic(http://palladium-megaverse.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=144200), but here we're setting the sights a lot lower. :D :P
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Kargan3033
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Need some spellchecking there, old egg, but otherwise it looks like a promising dig at the recently croaked Robotech Academy. :D :bandit: :clown:

Strange I am using Open Office and I ran this through it's spell checker and it did not show any spelling errors?

Robotech Academy?, I don't think I have seen that but all in all this humor tread was inspired by the Robotech Bloopers/Robotech Crossover threads in this sub forum, I'm hoping you and everyone else here will have fun with it.



Reference was to the recently de-Kickstarted Robotech Academy project with much controversy as to intended viewer demographic(http://palladium-megaverse.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=144200), but here we're setting the sights a lot lower. :D :P


Ahh I see thanks for the info, also I found out what the problem was with Open Office, it won't edit an RTF file that is not created by it, so I opened the old RTF in an updated Open Office, saved it as a txt file, spell checked the txt file then saved the spell checked txt as a new rtf created by the updated Open Office., so it should be easier to understand.
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

(Looking at the sex ed teacher)
"Minmei? Wow, you have NOT aged well..." :shock:
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by SRoss »

taalismn wrote:(Looking at the sex ed teacher)
"Minmei? Wow, you have NOT aged well..." :shock:


Unfortunately, she's also teaching an extra-curricular course in assassination.

Minmei: "Class, I will now demonstrate Pai Mei's Five-Palm Exploding Heart technique." :twisted:
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Arnie100 »

"Oooohh...do that again, Miss Minmei!!"
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

"I'm sorry, Professor Lang, but are you sure that Fold Drive construction is appropriate...and safe...for a high school ciriculum?"
"When I was their age I was building my first working nuclear reactor!"
"I take that as a 'no' then."
"We don't need to coddle these kids! The Rain of Death taught us we have to train them up fast to survive in a hostile universe!"
"But space/time folding drives?! These kids haven't even gotten their drivers' licenses yet!"
"That you know of."
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Arnie100 »

"Today; class, your flight instructor is Chief Toombs from Mauve Squadron!"
They can't see me...Right!?
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by guardiandashi »

Arnie100 wrote:"Today; class, your flight instructor is Chief Toombs from Mauve Squadron!"


and the gun safety class is taught by rocket raccoon (just got back from watching guardians of the galaxy)
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

Nameless Student: " Man these class are bloody murder! " * Thinks back to the sex ed class and shivers violently *

Nameless Student: " At lest it's LUNCHTIME! " :D

* Gets in line behind the other students in the cafeteria *

* Watches as a strange looking female dips her large ladle into what appears to be a huge cauldron of brightly glowing green sludge *

Nameless Student: :eek: *as the strange female slops the glowing green sludge into his bowl that has what appears to be a whole fish skeleton and other disgusting looking chunks of bio matter in it.*

Another Nameless Student: " Hey come on, get a move on it, I'm starving! "

Nameless Student:* Walks to an open table like he is being led off to be executed, " Why me? " * he asks himself as he dips his big shiny spoon into the unknown slop in his bowl and watches as the big shiny spoon starts to smoke and sizzle. *

Nameless Student: :?
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

The cafeteria counts as an extra credit lab for Xenobiology 101. You get a passing grade if you can correctly ID lunch through the semester.
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

taalismn wrote:The cafeteria counts as an extra credit lab for Xenobiology 101. You get a passing grade if you can correctly ID lunch through the semester.


:lol:

Or the UEG/SC is using the high school lunchroom to get rid of their expired protoculture or carry out black op biological experiments.
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Arnie100 »

The janitors are those who failed the BioSanitation Squad's selection course. And; of course, there's the occasional special transfer...

Edwards: "Oh, this just sucks..."
Kyle: "Shut up. You're not cleaning the kitchen."
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

Arnie100 wrote:The janitors are those who failed the BioSanitation Squad's selection course. And; of course, there's the occasional special transfer...

Edwards: "Oh, this just sucks..."
Kyle: "Shut up. You're not cleaning the kitchen."


Karno:Both of you shut the **** up, at lest you two candy a**es don't have to clean out the girl's bathrooms. :eek: :?
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Arnie100 »

Musica: "KARNO!!! What're you doing in there?!" :x
Karno: "Oh; come on!"

(Down below...)

Charon: "<So...what now??>"
Karno: "I was cleaning the girl's bathroom..."
Charon: "<You perv!!>" (And Karno gets booted through the door...again)
Karno: "It's not FAIR!!"
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

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Kargan3033 wrote:Monument City High school #69

Dieter Fredericks the principle of Monument City High school #69 was reading over the list students for the first day of the new school year and saw that there were some new transfer students that would be attending classes at MCH#69.

" Hmm I don't think I will have any trouble with these new students. " he thought to himself since he was a crack veteran of the Monument City's education system as he absent mindly twirled his riding crop in his right hand.

" Yes I think today is going to be a good day indeed. " he thought to himself as he put his righting crop down on his desk as he took up his mug of coffee and took a long drink of of while he waited for the school day to start.

Dana Sterling let out a disgusted sigh as she adjusted her school uniform’s skirt that was riding high.

" Damn it why did I have to end up here in this high school, I asked Dad and Mom if they would enroll me in the Fairlight Academy, I mean it's not like we can't afford it with Dad and Mom being war heroes and what not. " she groused to herself as she took notice of a girl who was about her age with long black hair as she was kissing a boy.

" Damn, when am I going to find a boyfriend? " she asked herself as she started to get slightly *flustered* as the girl and boy continued to swap spit.

After making her way into the school and over to her locker Dana noticed a strangely familiar girl who was playing kissy face with a boy.

" Nah it couldn’t be her...could it? " she asked herself as she looked the raven haired girl over and was not to sure if it have been the raven haired girl she had seen kissing a different boy when she walked onto the school grounds.

" Um excuse me Miss.. " she heard some say from behind her and when she turned around she found herself face to face with a tall, good looking boy with had a slightly troubled look on his youthful and handsome face. "

" SQUEEE! " Dana squealed as she felt very aroused as she saw that the nameless boy who had sooken to her was not only tall but fit looking as she felt her face flush a deep crimson.

" Ummm Miss are you ok? " to breath taking hansom boy as Dana saw a slightly flushed look on his handsome face.

" YES!, I'm fine, really! " Dana stammered as she was giving the nameless boy more then the once over as she was mentally striping him naked in her lust fevered mind.

" Umm my name is Zor and well I'm new here and I'm looking for Classroom 69 and I...... Are you sure your ok? " Zor asked the strange blond haired girl who was giving him a slightly ravenous look that made him very uncomfortable for some strange reason.

" Well it just so happens that is the classroom I'm going to. " Dana said with a clearly aroused tone of voice as she latched onto Zor's right arm.
" I'm Dana by the way, Dana Sterling. " she added as she felt the need to stake her claim on Zor as her mind was flashing her an erotic slide show of her and Zor *studying* together in her bedroom.

" I see. " Zor said as he found himself slightly disturbed but also pleased by this strange turn of events as he and Dana started to make their way to their first class together.

" What the hell? " Dana muttered to herself as she saw the same black haired girl that she had seen twice before *acoustic* a short girl.
" Wow Nova is really playing the field today and it's only the first day of school. " I know, what a slut she is. " Dana and Zor hear two girls say out loud as they passed the raven haired girl who was name Nova as she was trying to scrap the poor girl she was acoustic pancreas clean with her tongue.

When the two of them entered Classroom 69, both Zor and Dana looked around the half full classroom as Nova walked passed them after giving them both more then the once over and when they looked around the classroom Dana and Zor saw tall, muscular boy with long blue hair and blue eyes sitting at his desk with a hateful, almost homicidal sneer on his face.

Next they saw a short, small breasted girl with short wavy, light lime green hair and blood red eyes sitting next to the scowling boy who was looking at a person with long light lavender hair who they could not determine to be a boy or a girl with a dreamy look on her face.

As they looked around the classroom both Zor and Dana saw two open desks side by side at the front of the class with three girls sitting off to the right of the two open desks and could have sworn they were triplets save for the fact that one of the three girls had long light blue hair while the other two girls had long dark green hair.

Once they were seated Dana and Zor saw that the women standing behind the teacher’s desk was a short old women who looked like she had been an old hag well before the First Robotech War.

" Class settle down now! " the old hag said with a dedicated tone of voice that was much like long finger nails on a chalkboard.

" Today's lesson will be on Sex Education. " they heard the practically mummified teacher say with a clearly leering smile on her leathery lips that just about made everyone in the classroom toss their cookies of the extra chunky kind as they were mentally scared for life by the sickeningly erotic mental images of the semi undead teacher in a black, spiked leather S&M costume complete with a long, thick black leather bullwhip.

Ok folks this thread is meant to be an open thread like Robotech Bloopers/Robotech Crossover threads, meaning that anyone can add to this thread using characters from not only the Robotech anime and both the first and second edition Robotech games but you can also add characters of other Palladium games or other animes/SF shows so long as it's in a high school/everyday life type setting.

The *action* need not just be at the high school nor are the characters you would add to this thread need to be just high school students/teacher/maintenance staff.

Note this open thread is just for fun nothing serious.

Here's a few ideas to help get you started.
The Awareness as a machine shop/computer sciences teacher.
The Regess as the school nurse/lunch lady
The Regent/Anatole Leonard as gym/PE teachers.
T.R. Edwards as the school counsellor/political sciences teacher
The school mascot could a Pollinator*rabid or not*

I hope you all got a laugh out of this and will add to it, let your imagination run free and most of all have fun.


:lol: Will be looking forward to more, indeed.

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Need some spellchecking there, old egg, but otherwise it looks like a promising dig at the recently croaked Robotech Academy. :D :bandit: :clown:

Strange I am using Open Office and I ran this through it's spell checker and it did not show any spelling errors?

Robotech Academy?, I don't think I have seen that but all in all this humor tread was inspired by the Robotech Bloopers/Robotech Crossover threads in this sub forum, I'm hoping you and everyone else here will have fun with it.


Sorry, but wow, you must not "get out much"/not come here often enough to not hear about it.

taalismn wrote:(Looking at the sex ed teacher)
"Minmei? Wow, you have NOT aged well..." :shock:


:lol: :eek:

SRoss wrote:
taalismn wrote:(Looking at the sex ed teacher)
"Minmei? Wow, you have NOT aged well..." :shock:


Unfortunately, she's also teaching an extra-curricular course in assassination.

Minmei: "Class, I will now demonstrate Pai Mei's Five-Palm Exploding Heart technique." :twisted:


:lol: :lol:

Arnie100 wrote:"Oooohh...do that again, Miss Minmei!!"


:lol: :lol:

taalismn wrote:"I'm sorry, Professor Lang, but are you sure that Fold Drive construction is appropriate...and safe...for a high school ciriculum?"
"When I was their age I was building my first working nuclear reactor!"
"I take that as a 'no' then."
"We don't need to coddle these kids! The Rain of Death taught us we have to train them up fast to survive in a hostile universe!"
"But space/time folding drives?! These kids haven't even gotten their drivers' licenses yet!"
"That you know of."


:lol: :lol:
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Alpha 11 »

Arnie100 wrote:"Today; class, your flight instructor is Chief Toombs from Mauve Squadron!"


:lol: :lol: :lol: :eek: :shock: Run, now.

guardiandashi wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:"Today; class, your flight instructor is Chief Toombs from Mauve Squadron!"


and the gun safety class is taught by rocket raccoon (just got back from watching guardians of the galaxy)


:lol:

Kargan3033 wrote:Nameless Student: " Man these class are bloody murder! " * Thinks back to the sex ed class and shivers violently *

Nameless Student: " At lest it's LUNCHTIME! " :D

* Gets in line behind the other students in the cafeteria *

* Watches as a strange looking female dips her large ladle into what appears to be a huge cauldron of brightly glowing green sludge *

Nameless Student: :eek: *as the strange female slops the glowing green sludge into his bowl that has what appears to be a whole fish skeleton and other disgusting looking chunks of bio matter in it.*

Another Nameless Student: " Hey come on, get a move on it, I'm starving! "

Nameless Student:* Walks to an open table like he is being led off to be executed, " Why me? " * he asks himself as he dips his big shiny spoon into the unknown slop in his bowl and watches as the big shiny spoon starts to smoke and sizzle. *

Nameless Student: :?


:lol: :lol:

taalismn wrote:The cafeteria counts as an extra credit lab for Xenobiology 101. You get a passing grade if you can correctly ID lunch through the semester.


:lol: :eek: :shock:

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:The cafeteria counts as an extra credit lab for Xenobiology 101. You get a passing grade if you can correctly ID lunch through the semester.


:lol:

Or the UEG/SC is using the high school lunchroom to get rid of their expired protoculture or carry out black op biological experiments.


:lol:
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Alpha 11 »

Arnie100 wrote:The janitors are those who failed the BioSanitation Squad's selection course. And; of course, there's the occasional special transfer...

Edwards: "Oh, this just sucks..."
Kyle: "Shut up. You're not cleaning the kitchen."


:lol:

Kargan3033 wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:The janitors are those who failed the BioSanitation Squad's selection course. And; of course, there's the occasional special transfer...

Edwards: "Oh, this just sucks..."
Kyle: "Shut up. You're not cleaning the kitchen."


Karno:Both of you shut the **** up, at lest you two candy a**es don't have to clean out the girl's bathrooms. :eek: :?


:lol:

Arnie100 wrote:Musica: "KARNO!!! What're you doing in there?!" :x
Karno: "Oh; come on!"

(Down below...)

Charon: "<So...what now??>"
Karno: "I was cleaning the girl's bathroom..."
Charon: "<You perv!!>" (And Karno gets booted through the door...again)
Karno: "It's not FAIR!!"


:lol: :lol:
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

Arnie100 wrote:Musica: "KARNO!!! What're you doing in there?!" :x
Karno: "Oh; come on!"

(Down below...)

Charon: "<So...what now??>"
Karno: "I was cleaning the girl's bathroom..."
Charon: "<You perv!!>" (And Karno gets booted through the door...again)
Karno: "It's not FAIR!!"


And winds up landing the pen of the Pollinator mascot triumvirate of Fluffy, Muffy and Buffy who have not been fed their super yummy Triena protoculture kibble in three days awake in a cranky mood from their dreams of male pollinators and their much loved loved protoculture kibble.

Muffy:GRR!

Fluffy:GGGGGRRR!!

Buffy:GGGGRRRR!!!

Karno:OH SHI---AAHHH GET THEM OFF GET THEM OFF IT HURTS IT HURTS!!!

Nameless high school teacher 1:What was that noise?

Nameless high school teacher 2:I don't know, it sounded like it came from the mascot pen.

The two high school staffers walk into the mascot pen area and see Muffy, Buffy and Fluffy covered in blood with full bellies and content smiles as they are cleaning the blood off of themselves

Nameless high school teacher 1:Since when did we switch over to feeding the mascots raw meat?

Nameless high school teacher 2:I don't know for sure I'm pretty sure that Principle Dieter mention in the last staff meeting that he was going to change the Pollinator's food over to a meat base because they were getting constipated on the protoculture kibble.

Nameless high school teacher 1: Oh Damn look at the time, I'm going to be late for my home economics class, and today I have a classroom full of Praxians and Triolian Muses

Nameless high school teacher 2:You think that's bad I have to teach a class in comparative religion to a mixed class of Garudans and Perytonians and you know how touch they are about religion.

The two teachers walk away to their classes as Muffy, Fluffy and Buffy find that humanoid flesh is VERY AGREEABLE to them.
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

"Welcome to your first period of PhysEd. First, let me welcome you to the Monument City High School Sixty-Nine gymnasium and physical education facility.
Second, let me be blunt; some of you will not be making it through physical education in perfect health. In fact some of you may die.
This is because in accordance with government regulations requiring both a physical education curriculum on a par with Marine training, and the need to make maximum use of human resources in the wake of the Rain of Death, we've been obliged to accept as your gym instructors a number of ex-military officers who were drummed from regular service for 'eccentric' conduct-"

Phillips:(aside)"That translates as 'brutality.'

"-including an ex-Spetznaz colonel who feels that body armor is for wimps, a captain from the Indian Army whose idea of a 'quick jog' involves parkour through and over highway traffic, and a North Korean gymnastics instructor, who we suspect trained child assassins."

"Do we get extra credit for going 'Full Metal Jacket'?"

"No! Fragging your gym instructor is NOT allowed! And you all WILL pass the obstacle course!"

"Why?"

"Because school pride depends on it!"

"But-but-but what I heard, the obstacle course involves a minefield, a sheer two hundred foot wall, a threshing machine, and tar pits! How does school pride factor into it?"

"Because Furinkan High School in the Far East sector and Colditz Academy in Europe have both successfully competed against each other in running a similar obstacle course in intermural competition."

"Ah, Furinkan High rates lowest in academic achievement and highest in student brutality, and Colditz Academy is a reform school for borderline sociopaths and psychopaths too young to execute."

"Exactly! Two low-rank messes of educational institutes. Surely the best and brightest of MCHS Sixty-Nine can do better! Provided, of course, you survive. Please make sure your emergency contact and medical information is up to date."
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by SRoss »

"Hello children, I am your Home Ec/Agriculture teacher. You can call me The Regess."
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

SRoss wrote:"Hello children, I am your Home Ec/Agriculture teacher. You can call me The Regess."


"Please check your class equipment. You should each have received a personal mini-Genesis Pit. Do NOT lose it. "
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Kargan3033
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

taalismn wrote:"Welcome to your first period of PhysEd. First, let me welcome you to the Monument City High School Sixty-Nine gymnasium and physical education facility.
Second, let me be blunt; some of you will not be making it through physical education in perfect health. In fact some of you may die.
This is because in accordance with government regulations requiring both a physical education curriculum on a par with Marine training, and the need to make maximum use of human resources in the wake of the Rain of Death, we've been obliged to accept as your gym instructors a number of ex-military officers who were drummed from regular service for 'eccentric' conduct-"

Phillips:(aside)"That translates as 'brutality.'

"-including an ex-Spetznaz colonel who feels that body armor is for wimps, a captain from the Indian Army whose idea of a 'quick jog' involves parkour through and over highway traffic, and a North Korean gymnastics instructor, who we suspect trained child assassins."

"Do we get extra credit for going 'Full Metal Jacket'?"

"No! Fragging your gym instructor is NOT allowed! And you all WILL pass the obstacle course!"

"Why?"

"Because school pride depends on it!"

"But-but-but what I heard, the obstacle course involves a minefield, a sheer two hundred foot wall, a threshing machine, and tar pits! How does school pride factor into it?"

"Because Furinkan High School in the Far East sector and Colditz Academy in Europe have both successfully competed against each other in running a similar obstacle course in intermural competition."

"Ah, Furinkan High rates lowest in academic achievement and highest in student brutality, and Colditz Academy is a reform school for borderline sociopaths and psychopaths too young to execute."

"Exactly! Two low-rank messes of educational institutes. Surely the best and brightest of MCHS Sixty-Nine can do better! Provided, of course, you survive. Please make sure your emergency contact and medical information is up to date."

:eek: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Why do I have a feeling that the UEG has a very low regard for educational excellence. :?
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

SRoss wrote:"Hello children, I am your Home Ec/Agriculture teacher. You can call me The Regess."


Nameless Stoner Student: " Whoa! so you mean we are like going to be growing The Flower of Life?

Regess:" That is correct Human. "

Nameless Stoner Student:" Sweet ass deal!, a my girlfriend and I did some spores and we had a three month long wake and bake, that is when we passed out from trying to brake the Zentraedi rated bed we were making bacon on. "

Regess: :?:, " Does cooking strips of mammal flesh require a life mate and a bed? "

Nameless Stoner Student: :?: :!: " No disrespect Teach but are you like tripp'en out on Rainbow Spiders or something? "

Regess: :| " You will procure a Rainbow Spider and show me how it is used to make bacon after class. "

Nameless Stoner Student: :eek: :? :oops: :eek: :?
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

taalismn wrote:(Looking at the sex ed teacher)
"Minmei? Wow, you have NOT aged well..." :shock:


I meant to reply to this earlier but I got kind of side tracked

I would say that Minmei would be more of the school's drama queen...I mean teacher given she wrote the chart topping best seller " I Was A Teenage Drama Queen. " that is 150,000 pages of nothing more then vapid egotistical ramblings interspersed with the mad ravings of a crack smoking sl*t with raving incest fantasies that retails for 99.99 credits she would be most suited to be the school's drama teacher.

Could you imagine what kind of school play she would come up with?
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

Nameless Male Zentraedi Student:" Man that grammar teacher is bloody murder. "

Nameless Female Human Student:" No s**t, he's so anal I have to wonder if he was toilet trained at gun point when he was a screaming brat. "

Nameless Male Spherian Student:" Man you squishes are so obsessed with your biological functions it's a wonder you can even think stright. "

Nameless Female Human Student: " ^^%$ you to you heartless a&&hole! "

Nameless Male Zentraedi Student:" Oh oh it looks like it's her time of the month. "

Nameless Female Human Student:" GLARE OF DEATH 5000!

Nameless Male Spherian Student:" What is that suppose to mean?, man you squishes are so damn confusing, either want a drink? "

*Points to the Petit Cola machine in the hallway of the school.*

Nameless Male Zentraedi Student:" Sure if you are buying. "

Irate Nameless Female Human Student:*whispers under breath* " Cheap ass bastard! "

Irate Nameless Female Human Student:" Sure I'll have one. "

The Nameless Male Spherian Student feeds the cola machine the credits and gets three cans of cola.*

Nameless Male Zentraedi Student:*cracks open his can of cola and takes a swing from the can* " Hey this isn't cola. " he says as he and his friends look at their cans*

" Petit Cola Fruit Punch. "

Moody Nameless Female Human Student:*crack her can open and takes a drink* " Hey that's not bad, I had heard that the Petit Cola Company was come out with a new flavor that is suppose to be better then the normal Petit Cola, I just didn't expect it be in our school already. " * Muffy, Fluffy and Buffy walked in front of the three friends and begin a three way cleaning session. *

Nameless Male Spherian Student: " Even though we Shperians don't need to eat or drink like you squishes I have to admit that I find the taste of this liquid refreshment to be agreeable. "

Namelesss Male Zentraedi Student: " I hear you on that and after our grammar teacher freaked out on the class I need some thing to relax me. "

Moody Nameless Female Human Student: “ No kidding, it's not like improper grammar is going to kill anyone, hell I bet if these three..whatever the hell that could talk that a$$hole of a grammar teacher would freak out on them of bad grammar. “ *points to Muffy, Buffy and Fluffy. *

Nameless Male Shperian Student: “ Well that was completely pointless, even if whatever these things are could talk, *points to Fluffy, Buffy and Muffy. * “ I bet they are stupider then a bag of broken rocks. “

* The three friends take a drink of their fruit punch cola.*

Nameless Male Zentraedi Student: “ What the f.....?! “

* The three friends watch as Muffy, Buffy and Fluffy sit in front of them. *

Muffy: “ I challenge “

Buffy: “ The assertion “

Fluffy: “ That Pollinators are grammatically challenged . “

Nameless Female Human Student: :shock:

Nameless Male Shperian Student: :shock:

Nameless Male Zentraedi Student: :shock:

* The three friends watch as Fluufy, Muffy and Buffy line up behind each other and arrogantly walk down the hallway. *

* The three friends quickly check their cans of Petit Cola Fruit Punch. *

“ Now made with 90% less cola, 90% less fruit punch and a 180% more irradiated protocultue. “

Nameless Female Human Student: :eek:

Nameless Male Spherian Student: :?

Nameless Male Zentraedi Student: " SWEET! " 8)
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by SRoss »

Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:"Hello children, I am your Home Ec/Agriculture teacher. You can call me The Regess."


Nameless Stoner Student: " Whoa! so you mean we are like going to be growing The Flower of Life?

Regess:" That is correct Human. "

Nameless Stoner Student:" Sweet ass deal!, a my girlfriend and I did some spores and we had a three month long wake and bake, that is when we passed out from trying to brake the Zentraedi rated bed we were making bacon on. "

Regess: :?:, " Does cooking strips of mammal flesh require a life mate and a bed? "

Nameless Stoner Student: :?: :!: " No disrespect Teach but are you like tripp'en out on Rainbow Spiders or something? "

Regess: :| " You will procure a Rainbow Spider and show me how it is used to make bacon after class. "

Nameless Stoner Student: :eek: :? :oops: :eek: :?


"Umm ... Zor, have you been into the mushrooms again?"
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Arnie100 »

"Wait...what do you mean we lost the entire phys ed class?!"
"The new phys ed teacher, dude with purple hair..."
"Yeah, so?"
"They call him 'The Backstabber..."
"SO...so what?!"
"Well, the class failed to do five-mile run in a specified time...and so..."
"Spit out, man what'd he do?"
"He; uhmmm...well..."
:shock: "What's his name?"
"Khyron..."
:eek: :?
They can't see me...Right!?
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

Kargan3033 wrote:
I meant to reply to this earlier but I got kind of side tracked

I would say that Minmei would be more of the school's drama queen...I mean teacher given she wrote the chart topping best seller " I Was A Teenage Drama Queen. " that is 150,000 pages of nothing more then vapid egotistical ramblings interspersed with the mad ravings of a crack smoking sl*t with raving incest fantasies that retails for 99.99 credits she would be most suited to be the school's drama teacher.

Could you imagine what kind of school play she would come up with?


I am more worried that, given the intended demographics of this new series, that somebody clones Minmei and a younger version of her arrives at the school at the same time as older Minmei arrives to instruct the students in performing arts.
This sets the stage for a variety of possible outcomes, from a horrible scenario where Old Minmei tries to shape sycophantic and brainless Mini-Minmei into becoming what OM could not, to a scenario of outright war, where rebellious Mini-Minmei fights tooth and claw against a conservative and cranky Old Minmei.
"I'm going to become a meteorologist!"
"And waste your talent?! Are you mad or just stupid?"

Or....

To have one's cake and eat it too...
The cloners go overboard and clone over a dozen Minmeis(they got the idea from Zor)...They make up a homeroom class all their own, and each clone has its own personality...There's Drama Queen Mini-mei, Fem-Nazi Mini-mei, FemJock Mini-Mei, Emo-Goth Mini-Mei, Campus Lawyer Mini-Mei, Prankster Mini-Mei, Budding Social Activist-Terrorist Mini-Mei, Law-and-Order Mini-Mei, Sleaze Mini-Mei...
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Kargan3033
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
I meant to reply to this earlier but I got kind of side tracked

I would say that Minmei would be more of the school's drama queen...I mean teacher given she wrote the chart topping best seller " I Was A Teenage Drama Queen. " that is 150,000 pages of nothing more then vapid egotistical ramblings interspersed with the mad ravings of a crack smoking sl*t with raving incest fantasies that retails for 99.99 credits she would be most suited to be the school's drama teacher.

Could you imagine what kind of school play she would come up with?


I am more worried that, given the intended demographics of this new series, that somebody clones Minmei and a younger version of her arrives at the school at the same time as older Minmei arrives to instruct the students in performing arts.
This sets the stage for a variety of possible outcomes, from a horrible scenario where Old Minmei tries to shape sycophantic and brainless Mini-Minmei into becoming what OM could not, to a scenario of outright war, where rebellious Mini-Minmei fights tooth and claw against a conservative and cranky Old Minmei.
"I'm going to become a meteorologist!"
"And waste your talent?! Are you mad or just stupid?"

Or....

To have one's cake and eat it too...
The cloners go overboard and clone over a dozen Minmeis(they got the idea from Zor)...They make up a homeroom class all their own, and each clone has its own personality...There's Drama Queen Mini-mei, Fem-Nazi Mini-mei, FemJock Mini-Mei, Emo-Goth Mini-Mei, Campus Lawyer Mini-Mei, Prankster Mini-Mei, Budding Social Activist-Terrorist Mini-Mei, Law-and-Order Mini-Mei, Sleaze Mini-Mei...


" Sir, the CEO of Clones R Us is doing a strange, funky dance. " :D

I like the way you think my friend.
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

So many Minmei clones...
And Colonel Woff's son can't get a date with ANY of them... :twisted:
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Alpha 11 »

Kargan3033 wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:Musica: "KARNO!!! What're you doing in there?!" :x
Karno: "Oh; come on!"

(Down below...)

Charon: "<So...what now??>"
Karno: "I was cleaning the girl's bathroom..."
Charon: "<You perv!!>" (And Karno gets booted through the door...again)
Karno: "It's not FAIR!!"


And winds up landing the pen of the Pollinator mascot triumvirate of Fluffy, Muffy and Buffy who have not been fed their super yummy Triena protoculture kibble in three days awake in a cranky mood from their dreams of male pollinators and their much loved loved protoculture kibble.

Muffy:GRR!

Fluffy:GGGGGRRR!!

Buffy:GGGGRRRR!!!

Karno:OH SHI---AAHHH GET THEM OFF GET THEM OFF IT HURTS IT HURTS!!!

Nameless high school teacher 1:What was that noise?

Nameless high school teacher 2:I don't know, it sounded like it came from the mascot pen.

The two high school staffers walk into the mascot pen area and see Muffy, Buffy and Fluffy covered in blood with full bellies and content smiles as they are cleaning the blood off of themselves

Nameless high school teacher 1:Since when did we switch over to feeding the mascots raw meat?

Nameless high school teacher 2:I don't know for sure I'm pretty sure that Principle Dieter mention in the last staff meeting that he was going to change the Pollinator's food over to a meat base because they were getting constipated on the protoculture kibble.

Nameless high school teacher 1: Oh Damn look at the time, I'm going to be late for my home economics class, and today I have a classroom full of Praxians and Triolian Muses

Nameless high school teacher 2:You think that's bad I have to teach a class in comparative religion to a mixed class of Garudans and Perytonians and you know how touch they are about religion.

The two teachers walk away to their classes as Muffy, Fluffy and Buffy find that humanoid flesh is VERY AGREEABLE to them.


:lol: :lol: :eek: :shock: :?

taalismn wrote:"Welcome to your first period of PhysEd. First, let me welcome you to the Monument City High School Sixty-Nine gymnasium and physical education facility.
Second, let me be blunt; some of you will not be making it through physical education in perfect health. In fact some of you may die.
This is because in accordance with government regulations requiring both a physical education curriculum on a par with Marine training, and the need to make maximum use of human resources in the wake of the Rain of Death, we've been obliged to accept as your gym instructors a number of ex-military officers who were drummed from regular service for 'eccentric' conduct-"

Phillips:(aside)"That translates as 'brutality.'

"-including an ex-Spetznaz colonel who feels that body armor is for wimps, a captain from the Indian Army whose idea of a 'quick jog' involves parkour through and over highway traffic, and a North Korean gymnastics instructor, who we suspect trained child assassins."

"Do we get extra credit for going 'Full Metal Jacket'?"

"No! Fragging your gym instructor is NOT allowed! And you all WILL pass the obstacle course!"

"Why?"

"Because school pride depends on it!"

"But-but-but what I heard, the obstacle course involves a minefield, a sheer two hundred foot wall, a threshing machine, and tar pits! How does school pride factor into it?"

"Because Furinkan High School in the Far East sector and Colditz Academy in Europe have both successfully competed against each other in running a similar obstacle course in intermural competition."

"Ah, Furinkan High rates lowest in academic achievement and highest in student brutality, and Colditz Academy is a reform school for borderline sociopaths and psychopaths too young to execute."

"Exactly! Two low-rank messes of educational institutes. Surely the best and brightest of MCHS Sixty-Nine can do better! Provided, of course, you survive. Please make sure your emergency contact and medical information is up to date."


:lol: :lol:

SRoss wrote:"Hello children, I am your Home Ec/Agriculture teacher. You can call me The Regess."


:lol:

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:"Hello children, I am your Home Ec/Agriculture teacher. You can call me The Regess."


"Please check your class equipment. You should each have received a personal mini-Genesis Pit. Do NOT lose it. "


:lol: :lol: :shock:

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:"Welcome to your first period of PhysEd. First, let me welcome you to the Monument City High School Sixty-Nine gymnasium and physical education facility.
Second, let me be blunt; some of you will not be making it through physical education in perfect health. In fact some of you may die.
This is because in accordance with government regulations requiring both a physical education curriculum on a par with Marine training, and the need to make maximum use of human resources in the wake of the Rain of Death, we've been obliged to accept as your gym instructors a number of ex-military officers who were drummed from regular service for 'eccentric' conduct-"

Phillips:(aside)"That translates as 'brutality.'

"-including an ex-Spetznaz colonel who feels that body armor is for wimps, a captain from the Indian Army whose idea of a 'quick jog' involves parkour through and over highway traffic, and a North Korean gymnastics instructor, who we suspect trained child assassins."

"Do we get extra credit for going 'Full Metal Jacket'?"

"No! Fragging your gym instructor is NOT allowed! And you all WILL pass the obstacle course!"

"Why?"

"Because school pride depends on it!"

"But-but-but what I heard, the obstacle course involves a minefield, a sheer two hundred foot wall, a threshing machine, and tar pits! How does school pride factor into it?"

"Because Furinkan High School in the Far East sector and Colditz Academy in Europe have both successfully competed against each other in running a similar obstacle course in intermural competition."

"Ah, Furinkan High rates lowest in academic achievement and highest in student brutality, and Colditz Academy is a reform school for borderline sociopaths and psychopaths too young to execute."

"Exactly! Two low-rank messes of educational institutes. Surely the best and brightest of MCHS Sixty-Nine can do better! Provided, of course, you survive. Please make sure your emergency contact and medical information is up to date."

:eek: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Why do I have a feeling that the UEG has a very low regard for educational excellence. :?


:lol:
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Arnie100 »

"What do you mean...none of the Minmei's will talk to me?"
"They all know you're married, Col. Wolfe."
They can't see me...Right!?
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Alpha 11 »

Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:"Hello children, I am your Home Ec/Agriculture teacher. You can call me The Regess."


Nameless Stoner Student: " Whoa! so you mean we are like going to be growing The Flower of Life?

Regess:" That is correct Human. "

Nameless Stoner Student:" Sweet ass deal!, a my girlfriend and I did some spores and we had a three month long wake and bake, that is when we passed out from trying to brake the Zentraedi rated bed we were making bacon on. "

Regess: :?:, " Does cooking strips of mammal flesh require a life mate and a bed? "

Nameless Stoner Student: :?: :!: " No disrespect Teach but are you like tripp'en out on Rainbow Spiders or something? "

Regess: :| " You will procure a Rainbow Spider and show me how it is used to make bacon after class. "

Nameless Stoner Student: :eek: :? :oops: :eek: :?


:lol: :lol: :lol:

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:(Looking at the sex ed teacher)
"Minmei? Wow, you have NOT aged well..." :shock:


I meant to reply to this earlier but I got kind of side tracked

I would say that Minmei would be more of the school's drama queen...I mean teacher given she wrote the chart topping best seller " I Was A Teenage Drama Queen. " that is 150,000 pages of nothing more then vapid egotistical ramblings interspersed with the mad ravings of a crack smoking sl*t with raving incest fantasies that retails for 99.99 credits she would be most suited to be the school's drama teacher.

Could you imagine what kind of school play she would come up with?


:lol:
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Alpha 11 »

Kargan3033 wrote:Nameless Male Zentraedi Student:" Man that grammar teacher is bloody murder. "

Nameless Female Human Student:" No s**t, he's so anal I have to wonder if he was toilet trained at gun point when he was a screaming brat. "

Nameless Male Spherian Student:" Man you squishes are so obsessed with your biological functions it's a wonder you can even think stright. "

Nameless Female Human Student: " ^^%$ you to you heartless a&&hole! "

Nameless Male Zentraedi Student:" Oh oh it looks like it's her time of the month. "

Nameless Female Human Student:" GLARE OF DEATH 5000!

Nameless Male Spherian Student:" What is that suppose to mean?, man you squishes are so damn confusing, either want a drink? "

*Points to the Petit Cola machine in the hallway of the school.*

Nameless Male Zentraedi Student:" Sure if you are buying. "

Irate Nameless Female Human Student:*whispers under breath* " Cheap ass bastard! "

Irate Nameless Female Human Student:" Sure I'll have one. "

The Nameless Male Spherian Student feeds the cola machine the credits and gets three cans of cola.*

Nameless Male Zentraedi Student:*cracks open his can of cola and takes a swing from the can* " Hey this isn't cola. " he says as he and his friends look at their cans*

" Petit Cola Fruit Punch. "

Moody Nameless Female Human Student:*crack her can open and takes a drink* " Hey that's not bad, I had heard that the Petit Cola Company was come out with a new flavor that is suppose to be better then the normal Petit Cola, I just didn't expect it be in our school already. " * Muffy, Fluffy and Buffy walked in front of the three friends and begin a three way cleaning session. *

Nameless Male Spherian Student: " Even though we Shperians don't need to eat or drink like you squishes I have to admit that I find the taste of this liquid refreshment to be agreeable. "

Namelesss Male Zentraedi Student: " I hear you on that and after our grammar teacher freaked out on the class I need some thing to relax me. "

Moody Nameless Female Human Student: “ No kidding, it's not like improper grammar is going to kill anyone, hell I bet if these three..whatever the hell that could talk that a$$hole of a grammar teacher would freak out on them of bad grammar. “ *points to Muffy, Buffy and Fluffy. *

Nameless Male Shperian Student: “ Well that was completely pointless, even if whatever these things are could talk, *points to Fluffy, Buffy and Muffy. * “ I bet they are stupider then a bag of broken rocks. “

* The three friends take a drink of their fruit punch cola.*

Nameless Male Zentraedi Student: “ What the f.....?! “

* The three friends watch as Muffy, Buffy and Fluffy sit in front of them. *

Muffy: “ I challenge “

Buffy: “ The assertion “

Fluffy: “ That Pollinators are grammatically challenged . “

Nameless Female Human Student: :shock:

Nameless Male Shperian Student: :shock:

Nameless Male Zentraedi Student: :shock:

* The three friends watch as Fluufy, Muffy and Buffy line up behind each other and arrogantly walk down the hallway. *

* The three friends quickly check their cans of Petit Cola Fruit Punch. *

“ Now made with 90% less cola, 90% less fruit punch and a 180% more irradiated protocultue. “

Nameless Female Human Student: :eek:

Nameless Male Spherian Student: :?

Nameless Male Zentraedi Student: " SWEET! " 8)


:lol: :lol:
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Kargan3033
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

SRoss wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:"Hello children, I am your Home Ec/Agriculture teacher. You can call me The Regess."


Nameless Stoner Student: " Whoa! so you mean we are like going to be growing The Flower of Life?

Regess:" That is correct Human. "

Nameless Stoner Student:" Sweet ass deal!, a my girlfriend and I did some spores and we had a three month long wake and bake, that is when we passed out from trying to brake the Zentraedi rated bed we were making bacon on. "

Regess: :?:, " Does cooking strips of mammal flesh require a life mate and a bed? "

Nameless Stoner Student: :?: :!: " No disrespect Teach but are you like tripp'en out on Rainbow Spiders or something? "

Regess: :| " You will procure a Rainbow Spider and show me how it is used to make bacon after class. "

Nameless Stoner Student: :eek: :? :oops: :eek: :?


"Umm ... Zor, have you been into the mushrooms again?"


Zor:" Damn that Alvarez, he didn't tell me that this would happen! " *Freaked out screams of pain from the boy's bathroom followed by a sound and stench so monumentally foul that it is best left undiscribed for the sake of the reader's stomach contents. * :twisted:
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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Alpha 11
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Alpha 11 »

SRoss wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:"Hello children, I am your Home Ec/Agriculture teacher. You can call me The Regess."


Nameless Stoner Student: " Whoa! so you mean we are like going to be growing The Flower of Life?

Regess:" That is correct Human. "

Nameless Stoner Student:" Sweet ass deal!, a my girlfriend and I did some spores and we had a three month long wake and bake, that is when we passed out from trying to brake the Zentraedi rated bed we were making bacon on. "

Regess: :?:, " Does cooking strips of mammal flesh require a life mate and a bed? "

Nameless Stoner Student: :?: :!: " No disrespect Teach but are you like tripp'en out on Rainbow Spiders or something? "

Regess: :| " You will procure a Rainbow Spider and show me how it is used to make bacon after class. "

Nameless Stoner Student: :eek: :? :oops: :eek: :?


"Umm ... Zor, have you been into the mushrooms again?"


:lol:

Arnie100 wrote:"Wait...what do you mean we lost the entire phys ed class?!"
"The new phys ed teacher, dude with purple hair..."
"Yeah, so?"
"They call him 'The Backstabber..."
"SO...so what?!"
"Well, the class failed to do five-mile run in a specified time...and so..."
"Spit out, man what'd he do?"
"He; uhmmm...well..."
:shock: "What's his name?"
"Khyron..."
:eek: :?


:lol: :lol:

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
I meant to reply to this earlier but I got kind of side tracked

I would say that Minmei would be more of the school's drama queen...I mean teacher given she wrote the chart topping best seller " I Was A Teenage Drama Queen. " that is 150,000 pages of nothing more then vapid egotistical ramblings interspersed with the mad ravings of a crack smoking sl*t with raving incest fantasies that retails for 99.99 credits she would be most suited to be the school's drama teacher.

Could you imagine what kind of school play she would come up with?


I am more worried that, given the intended demographics of this new series, that somebody clones Minmei and a younger version of her arrives at the school at the same time as older Minmei arrives to instruct the students in performing arts.
This sets the stage for a variety of possible outcomes, from a horrible scenario where Old Minmei tries to shape sycophantic and brainless Mini-Minmei into becoming what OM could not, to a scenario of outright war, where rebellious Mini-Minmei fights tooth and claw against a conservative and cranky Old Minmei.
"I'm going to become a meteorologist!"
"And waste your talent?! Are you mad or just stupid?"

Or....

To have one's cake and eat it too...
The cloners go overboard and clone over a dozen Minmeis(they got the idea from Zor)...They make up a homeroom class all their own, and each clone has its own personality...There's Drama Queen Mini-mei, Fem-Nazi Mini-mei, FemJock Mini-Mei, Emo-Goth Mini-Mei, Campus Lawyer Mini-Mei, Prankster Mini-Mei, Budding Social Activist-Terrorist Mini-Mei, Law-and-Order Mini-Mei, Sleaze Mini-Mei...


:lol: :?

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
I meant to reply to this earlier but I got kind of side tracked

I would say that Minmei would be more of the school's drama queen...I mean teacher given she wrote the chart topping best seller " I Was A Teenage Drama Queen. " that is 150,000 pages of nothing more then vapid egotistical ramblings interspersed with the mad ravings of a crack smoking sl*t with raving incest fantasies that retails for 99.99 credits she would be most suited to be the school's drama teacher.

Could you imagine what kind of school play she would come up with?


I am more worried that, given the intended demographics of this new series, that somebody clones Minmei and a younger version of her arrives at the school at the same time as older Minmei arrives to instruct the students in performing arts.
This sets the stage for a variety of possible outcomes, from a horrible scenario where Old Minmei tries to shape sycophantic and brainless Mini-Minmei into becoming what OM could not, to a scenario of outright war, where rebellious Mini-Minmei fights tooth and claw against a conservative and cranky Old Minmei.
"I'm going to become a meteorologist!"
"And waste your talent?! Are you mad or just stupid?"

Or....

To have one's cake and eat it too...
The cloners go overboard and clone over a dozen Minmeis(they got the idea from Zor)...They make up a homeroom class all their own, and each clone has its own personality...There's Drama Queen Mini-mei, Fem-Nazi Mini-mei, FemJock Mini-Mei, Emo-Goth Mini-Mei, Campus Lawyer Mini-Mei, Prankster Mini-Mei, Budding Social Activist-Terrorist Mini-Mei, Law-and-Order Mini-Mei, Sleaze Mini-Mei...


" Sir, the CEO of Clones R Us is doing a strange, funky dance. " :D

I like the way you think my friend.


:lol: :lol:
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Alpha 11
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Alpha 11 »

taalismn wrote:So many Minmei clones...
And Colonel Woff's son can't get a date with ANY of them... :twisted:


:lol: :lol:

Arnie100 wrote:"What do you mean...none of the Minmei's will talk to me?"
"They all know you're married, Col. Wolfe."


:lol:

Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:"Hello children, I am your Home Ec/Agriculture teacher. You can call me The Regess."


Nameless Stoner Student: " Whoa! so you mean we are like going to be growing The Flower of Life?

Regess:" That is correct Human. "

Nameless Stoner Student:" Sweet ass deal!, a my girlfriend and I did some spores and we had a three month long wake and bake, that is when we passed out from trying to brake the Zentraedi rated bed we were making bacon on. "

Regess: :?:, " Does cooking strips of mammal flesh require a life mate and a bed? "

Nameless Stoner Student: :?: :!: " No disrespect Teach but are you like tripp'en out on Rainbow Spiders or something? "

Regess: :| " You will procure a Rainbow Spider and show me how it is used to make bacon after class. "

Nameless Stoner Student: :eek: :? :oops: :eek: :?


"Umm ... Zor, have you been into the mushrooms again?"


Zor:" Damn that Alvarez, he didn't tell me that this would happen! " *Freaked out screams of pain from the boy's bathroom followed by a sound and stench so monumentally foul that it is best left undiscribed for the sake of the reader's stomach contents. * :twisted:


:lol: :lol:
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Kargan3033
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

taalismn wrote:So many Minmei clones...
And Colonel Woff's son can't get a date with ANY of them... :twisted:


Wasn't Woff's son named Johny? :twisted:
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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taalismn
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Location: Somewhere between Heaven, Hell, and New England

Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:So many Minmei clones...
And Colonel Woff's son can't get a date with ANY of them... :twisted:


Wasn't Woff's son named Johny? :twisted:


Indeed.
"Face it, Johnny, seduction skills just aren't genetic in your family."
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
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Arnie100
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Arnie100 »

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:So many Minmei clones...
And Colonel Woff's son can't get a date with ANY of them... :twisted:


Wasn't Woff's son named Johny? :twisted:


Indeed.
"Face it, Johnny, seduction skills just aren't genetic in your family."


Johnny: "Dad, I can't get a date for the prom."
Col. Wolfe: "Neither can I, son..."
Johnny: "Uhhhmmmm...but, Mom..."
Col. Wolfe: "That IS a bit of problem..."
They can't see me...Right!?
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Kargan3033
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:So many Minmei clones...
And Colonel Woff's son can't get a date with ANY of them... :twisted:


Wasn't Woff's son named Johnny? :twisted:


Indeed.
"Face it, Johnny, seduction skills just aren't genetic in your family."


Nameless School staffer:" Excuse me Sir but I wanted to tell you that Johnny Woff will be arriving for his session in a few minutes. '

School Consuler T.R.Edwards:" Very good. "

*Nameless School Staffer leaves T.R.Edward's office*

* T.R.Edwards starts reading over Johnny Woff's school record *

* Crack! *

T.R.Edwards: " Come in the door's open. "

* CRASH!, SMASH!, CRACK! *

* T.R.Edwards sees the bloody blade of an axe being pulled out of what is left of the door to his consuling office to be replaced with a deranged and blood splattered face of a young boy. *

Johnny Woff: " Here's JOHNNY! "
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
guardiandashi
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by guardiandashi »

A new student with a "slight hair disorder" walks through the doors out of the office/registration area grumbling..
Sarah stupid people all I did was answer my age and occupation, and they make comments about child soldiers and send me to school... only good thing is they at least acknowledged that I had some language skills, and some "military skills" sigh, lets see what classes I got:
first period remedial English
second period tutoring session, 1st grade English?
3rd period tutoring session Remedial Reading English?
4th Period Physical Education
Lunch
5th Period Home Economics
6th Period Shop (wielding)
7th period Varies Military/survival prep
after school ....

Spoiler:
Player: __________________________________
Name: _____Sarah________________________
Alignment: ___Scrupulous__________________
Hit Point: _50___Current HP: _______
_SDC:___172 Current: __SDC:_______
MDC 222 Current MDC __________
Level: _1___ EXP:______________
O.C.C.: _____Dogboy/PSI-hound Wolf____
Breed: __WOLF______Horror Factor: _____
IQ: __28 Skill bonus:________14__%
ME: __20 Save vs. psi/ins.:_____3___
MA: __15 Trust/intimidate:________%
SN PS: __46 Damage bonus +__+31 *___
PP: __29 Strike/parry/dodge +___7__
SN PE: __44 Coma/death/poison: 44%_/_+8
PB: __26 Charm/impress: ______80_%
Spd: 74/5 feet/minute: _____4440/300____
P.P.E.:___15_/______I.S.P.:__70___/______

Age: __5__Sex: ___Female
Height:7ft 7in_2.3368m Weight: _407lb 184.61kg__
Lift: ____________ Carry: ___________
Throw (max): _________ lbs ________ ft
Run: __47.72_mph ___4440__ft/min
______ft/melee _______ ft/attack
Hand-to-Hand: __Martial Arts____________
# of attacks: ____5___ Initiative: + _4_______
Strike: + ___8____ Parry: + __11____
Dodge: + 11______ Auto-dodge: + ______
Damage: + __31sdc__ Roll: + _6____
Disarm: + ______ Pull Punch: + ____
Punch: _6D6MDC_ Restrained punch: _1D6X10 SDC
Power Punch _2D6X10 MDC_____ 2D6 nip 5D6 Bite
Kick: _2D4____ Jump Kick: ___________
Flip: ______1D6___________________
Knock out: __nat 20_______ Critical __________-20
Death Blow: ______________________

Armor 1: Armor 2:
__DC AR: __ Env: ____ __DC AR: __ Env: ____
Penalties: Penalties:
Notes: Notes:

Area T C Area T C
Body Body
Head Head
Arms Arms
Legs Legs




Saving Throws:
Spell (12) + Possession +
Ritual (16) + Horror +
Psionics (____) + Death + 44 %
Toxin (16) + Pain (14) +
Poison (14) + Perception +
Drugs (15) +
Insanity (12) +
Skills +lv % Skills +lv %
Language: American 1% _98_% Basic Electronics 5% 44_%
Language: Spanish 3% _69_% Boxing
Climbing 5% _69_% Gymnastics
Intelligence______ 4% _52_% Cooking 5% 49_%
Land Navigation 4% _ 60_% Swimming 5% 64_%
Pilot: Hovercraft 5% _ 74_% Sniper
Read Sensory Equip 5% _54_% Wrestling
Running Forced March
Wilderness Survival 5% _54_% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% ________________ ____ ____%
OCC Related ________________ ____ ____%
Armorer 3% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
Basic Mechanics(**) 5% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
First Aid 5% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
Parachuting 5% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
Interrogation Tech. 5% 39_% ________________ ____ ____%
Recognize Weapon 5% 49_% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% Climb Rope /Rappel 2% 74_%
________________ ___ ____% Basic Prowl 44_%
________________ ___ ____% Back Flip 2% 84_%
________________ ___ ____% work Parallel bars/rings 3% 74_%
________________ ___ ____% Sense of Balance 2% 64_%

Weapon Damage St/Par
Aim/Bst Ammo Range ROF
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/

Weapon Proficiencies Str/Aim Thr/Bst Par/Rng Dam/Rate
Energy Pistol
Energy Rifle
Sword
Heavy MD Weapons














Cybernetics/Bionics/Biowizardry:________________
______________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________

Vehicle log
Type: ______________________________________
Crew: ______________________________________
Max speed: _________ Terrain: _________________
Max range: _______ Engine Type: _______________
Length: ________ Weight: __________
Area T C Area T C
Main Body
Pilot Comp.
Tires
Weapon Dam St/Br RoF Range Ammo
/

/

/


Vehicle Notes:_______________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________
___________________________________________

Psionics Range Duration save I.S.P.
Sense Evil ____ _______ ___ ____
Sense Magic ______ ____ _______ ___ ____
Sixth Sense ______ ____ _______ ___ ____
Empathy (rec. only) ____ _______ ___ ____
Total Recall ____ _______ ___ 2
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____

Equipment: A suit of heavy: (50 MDC. standard) Dog Pack DPM Riot armor (Note:Full environmental armor IS generally reserved for officers, Dog
Boy Special Forces and special assignments.). uniform, dress uniform.
tinted goggles or non-environmental helmet with or without visor. PDD pocket audio recorder, pocket laser distancer. flashlight,
pocket mirror. cigarette lighter. 100 feet (30.5 m) of lightweight
rope. small hammer. four spikes. 1D6 animal snares, infrared distancing
binoculars. portable language translator, survival knife, a
pair of Vibro-Knives or Vibro-Claws a Vibro-Saber, C-18 laser pistol. a C-12 laser assault rifle. both with telescopic sight and nightvision scope, four additional E-Clips for the weapon, plus knapsack, backpack, utility belt. air tilter. gas mask, and canteen.
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
Credits: CS: _____________ BM: _____________ Other:___________
Metals & Gems: _____________________________________________
Tradable goods: _____________________________________________
Other: _____________________________________________________

Notes:__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Dog Boy Abilities:
Sense Psychic & Magic:
Track Specific Psychic Scent: _____/_____% Range ______/______ft
+20% with blood, hair, or clothing, -10% near strong PPE source,
-1/2 near Ley Line
Recognize Psychic Scent: __4%__/__24__%
Sense Supernatural Being, ID Creature + 2% 76_%
Superior Sense of Smell ½ penalties while blind (-5 S/P/D):
ID Common & Strong Scent: ______ ft _84__%
Recognize & ID Specific Scent ______ ft _68___%
Track by Specific Scent Alone: Range ______/______ ft Roll every
1000 ft a failed roll loses trail 2 out of 3 rolls to relocate the trail.
Keen Sense of Hearing: 75% better than humans
Good Sight: 200-270 degree field of vision. Can see in color.

Special Abilities and Information:_PE as applies to weight/load and exertion 2x human 1/2 fatigue dogboy, 1/2 fatigue extreme PE, can be active for 6+hrs due to supernatural PE________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________

Cries and all because I was honest when I told that person I was 5 years old, and I didn't know where I was after I stumbled through a RIFT.
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Arnie100
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Arnie100 »

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:So many Minmei clones...
And Colonel Woff's son can't get a date with ANY of them... :twisted:


Wasn't Woff's son named Johnny? :twisted:


Indeed.
"Face it, Johnny, seduction skills just aren't genetic in your family."


Nameless School staffer:" Excuse me Sir but I wanted to tell you that Johnny Woff will be arriving for his session in a few minutes. '

School Consuler T.R.Edwards:" Very good. "

*Nameless School Staffer leaves T.R.Edward's office*

* T.R.Edwards starts reading over Johnny Woff's school record *

* Crack! *

T.R.Edwards: " Come in the door's open. "

* CRASH!, SMASH!, CRACK! *

* T.R.Edwards sees the bloody blade of an axe being pulled out of what is left of the door to his consuling office to be replaced with a deranged and blood splattered face of a young boy. *

Johnny Woff: " Here's JOHNNY! "


Col. Wolfe: "I have had about enough of young man! Good grief! Breaking through Edwardd' door like that!"
Johnny: "But...Dad...!"
Col. Wolfe: "And you didn't use the axe on him?!"
Johnny: "I forgot!"
Col. Wolfe: "You're GROUNDED!!"
They can't see me...Right!?
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Kargan3033
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

Arnie100 wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:So many Minmei clones...
And Colonel Woff's son can't get a date with ANY of them... :twisted:


Wasn't Woff's son named Johnny? :twisted:


Indeed.
"Face it, Johnny, seduction skills just aren't genetic in your family."


Nameless School staffer:" Excuse me Sir but I wanted to tell you that Johnny Woff will be arriving for his session in a few minutes. '

School Consuler T.R.Edwards:" Very good. "

*Nameless School Staffer leaves T.R.Edward's office*

* T.R.Edwards starts reading over Johnny Woff's school record *

* Crack! *

T.R.Edwards: " Come in the door's open. "

* CRASH!, SMASH!, CRACK! *

* T.R.Edwards sees the bloody blade of an axe being pulled out of what is left of the door to his consuling office to be replaced with a deranged and blood splattered face of a young boy. *

Johnny Woff: " Here's JOHNNY! "


Col. Wolfe: "I have had about enough of young man! Good grief! Breaking through Edwardd' door like that!"
Johnny: "But...Dad...!"
Col. Wolfe: "And you didn't use the axe on him?!"
Johnny: "I forgot!"
Col. Wolfe: "You're GROUNDED!!"


:lol:
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
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Kargan3033
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Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Kargan3033 »

guardiandashi wrote:A new student with a "slight hair disorder" walks through the doors out of the office/registration area grumbling..
Sarah stupid people all I did was answer my age and occupation, and they make comments about child soldiers and send me to school... only good thing is they at least acknowledged that I had some language skills, and some "military skills" sigh, lets see what classes I got:
first period remedial English
second period tutoring session, 1st grade English?
3rd period tutoring session Remedial Reading English?
4th Period Physical Education
Lunch
5th Period Home Economics
6th Period Shop (wielding)
7th period Varies Military/survival prep
after school ....

Spoiler:
Player: __________________________________
Name: _____Sarah________________________
Alignment: ___Scrupulous__________________
Hit Point: _50___Current HP: _______
_SDC:___172 Current: __SDC:_______
MDC 222 Current MDC __________
Level: _1___ EXP:______________
O.C.C.: _____Dogboy/PSI-hound Wolf____
Breed: __WOLF______Horror Factor: _____
IQ: __28 Skill bonus:________14__%
ME: __20 Save vs. psi/ins.:_____3___
MA: __15 Trust/intimidate:________%
SN PS: __46 Damage bonus +__+31 *___
PP: __29 Strike/parry/dodge +___7__
SN PE: __44 Coma/death/poison: 44%_/_+8
PB: __26 Charm/impress: ______80_%
Spd: 74/5 feet/minute: _____4440/300____
P.P.E.:___15_/______I.S.P.:__70___/______

Age: __5__Sex: ___Female
Height:7ft 7in_2.3368m Weight: _407lb 184.61kg__
Lift: ____________ Carry: ___________
Throw (max): _________ lbs ________ ft
Run: __47.72_mph ___4440__ft/min
______ft/melee _______ ft/attack
Hand-to-Hand: __Martial Arts____________
# of attacks: ____5___ Initiative: + _4_______
Strike: + ___8____ Parry: + __11____
Dodge: + 11______ Auto-dodge: + ______
Damage: + __31sdc__ Roll: + _6____
Disarm: + ______ Pull Punch: + ____
Punch: _6D6MDC_ Restrained punch: _1D6X10 SDC
Power Punch _2D6X10 MDC_____ 2D6 nip 5D6 Bite
Kick: _2D4____ Jump Kick: ___________
Flip: ______1D6___________________
Knock out: __nat 20_______ Critical __________-20
Death Blow: ______________________

Armor 1: Armor 2:
__DC AR: __ Env: ____ __DC AR: __ Env: ____
Penalties: Penalties:
Notes: Notes:

Area T C Area T C
Body Body
Head Head
Arms Arms
Legs Legs




Saving Throws:
Spell (12) + Possession +
Ritual (16) + Horror +
Psionics (____) + Death + 44 %
Toxin (16) + Pain (14) +
Poison (14) + Perception +
Drugs (15) +
Insanity (12) +
Skills +lv % Skills +lv %
Language: American 1% _98_% Basic Electronics 5% 44_%
Language: Spanish 3% _69_% Boxing
Climbing 5% _69_% Gymnastics
Intelligence______ 4% _52_% Cooking 5% 49_%
Land Navigation 4% _ 60_% Swimming 5% 64_%
Pilot: Hovercraft 5% _ 74_% Sniper
Read Sensory Equip 5% _54_% Wrestling
Running Forced March
Wilderness Survival 5% _54_% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% ________________ ____ ____%
OCC Related ________________ ____ ____%
Armorer 3% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
Basic Mechanics(**) 5% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
First Aid 5% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
Parachuting 5% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
Interrogation Tech. 5% 39_% ________________ ____ ____%
Recognize Weapon 5% 49_% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% Climb Rope /Rappel 2% 74_%
________________ ___ ____% Basic Prowl 44_%
________________ ___ ____% Back Flip 2% 84_%
________________ ___ ____% work Parallel bars/rings 3% 74_%
________________ ___ ____% Sense of Balance 2% 64_%

Weapon Damage St/Par
Aim/Bst Ammo Range ROF
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/

Weapon Proficiencies Str/Aim Thr/Bst Par/Rng Dam/Rate
Energy Pistol
Energy Rifle
Sword
Heavy MD Weapons














Cybernetics/Bionics/Biowizardry:________________
______________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________

Vehicle log
Type: ______________________________________
Crew: ______________________________________
Max speed: _________ Terrain: _________________
Max range: _______ Engine Type: _______________
Length: ________ Weight: __________
Area T C Area T C
Main Body
Pilot Comp.
Tires
Weapon Dam St/Br RoF Range Ammo
/

/

/


Vehicle Notes:_______________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________
___________________________________________

Psionics Range Duration save I.S.P.
Sense Evil ____ _______ ___ ____
Sense Magic ______ ____ _______ ___ ____
Sixth Sense ______ ____ _______ ___ ____
Empathy (rec. only) ____ _______ ___ ____
Total Recall ____ _______ ___ 2
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____

Equipment: A suit of heavy: (50 MDC. standard) Dog Pack DPM Riot armor (Note:Full environmental armor IS generally reserved for officers, Dog
Boy Special Forces and special assignments.). uniform, dress uniform.
tinted goggles or non-environmental helmet with or without visor. PDD pocket audio recorder, pocket laser distancer. flashlight,
pocket mirror. cigarette lighter. 100 feet (30.5 m) of lightweight
rope. small hammer. four spikes. 1D6 animal snares, infrared distancing
binoculars. portable language translator, survival knife, a
pair of Vibro-Knives or Vibro-Claws a Vibro-Saber, C-18 laser pistol. a C-12 laser assault rifle. both with telescopic sight and nightvision scope, four additional E-Clips for the weapon, plus knapsack, backpack, utility belt. air tilter. gas mask, and canteen.
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
Credits: CS: _____________ BM: _____________ Other:___________
Metals & Gems: _____________________________________________
Tradable goods: _____________________________________________
Other: _____________________________________________________

Notes:__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Dog Boy Abilities:
Sense Psychic & Magic:
Track Specific Psychic Scent: _____/_____% Range ______/______ft
+20% with blood, hair, or clothing, -10% near strong PPE source,
-1/2 near Ley Line
Recognize Psychic Scent: __4%__/__24__%
Sense Supernatural Being, ID Creature + 2% 76_%
Superior Sense of Smell ½ penalties while blind (-5 S/P/D):
ID Common & Strong Scent: ______ ft _84__%
Recognize & ID Specific Scent ______ ft _68___%
Track by Specific Scent Alone: Range ______/______ ft Roll every
1000 ft a failed roll loses trail 2 out of 3 rolls to relocate the trail.
Keen Sense of Hearing: 75% better than humans
Good Sight: 200-270 degree field of vision. Can see in color.

Special Abilities and Information:_PE as applies to weight/load and exertion 2x human 1/2 fatigue dogboy, 1/2 fatigue extreme PE, can be active for 6+hrs due to supernatural PE________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________

Cries and all because I was honest when I told that person I was 5 years old, and I didn't know where I was after I stumbled through a RIFT.


Nice!, thanks for joining, I look forward to seeing what you will do with this character. 8)
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "
User avatar
taalismn
Priest
Posts: 47908
Joined: Tue Sep 02, 2003 8:19 pm
Location: Somewhere between Heaven, Hell, and New England

Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by taalismn »

Kargan3033 wrote:[


Nameless School staffer:" Excuse me Sir but I wanted to tell you that Johnny Woff will be arriving for his session in a few minutes. '

School Consuler T.R.Edwards:" Very good. "

*Nameless School Staffer leaves T.R.Edward's office*

* T.R.Edwards starts reading over Johnny Woff's school record *

* Crack! *

T.R.Edwards: " Come in the door's open. "

* CRASH!, SMASH!, CRACK! *

* T.R.Edwards sees the bloody blade of an axe being pulled out of what is left of the door to his consuling office to be replaced with a deranged and blood splattered face of a young boy. *

Johnny Woff: " Here's JOHNNY! "



Yep, and the other school counselor's the Palladium Forum's resident Macrossist/anti-Robotech. :P
"Look, quit any idea of being a robotechnician, a robotech pilot, a robotech ANYTHING. There's no future in it, and good riddance to it. Nobody will love you. Heck, damn few people love you now aside from a few old-time geeks. Your parents mismanaged you, you don't even have an original personality; it's all cribbed from other sources and other people. Learn Japanese and get a REAL life, why don't you?!"

Keeps the school psychologist busy with emergency calls and writing anti-depressant prescriptions.

He only took the job because he can use his office as a storage cubicle for his stuff(it's cheaper than renting a self-storage bunker). :P :P
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------
User avatar
Alpha 11
Palladin
Posts: 8227
Joined: Wed Apr 20, 2005 4:14 pm
Location: Northwood, ND

Re: Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Unread post by Alpha 11 »

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:So many Minmei clones...
And Colonel Woff's son can't get a date with ANY of them... :twisted:


Wasn't Woff's son named Johny? :twisted:


:lol:

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:So many Minmei clones...
And Colonel Woff's son can't get a date with ANY of them... :twisted:


Wasn't Woff's son named Johny? :twisted:


Indeed.
"Face it, Johnny, seduction skills just aren't genetic in your family."


:lol:

Arnie100 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:So many Minmei clones...
And Colonel Woff's son can't get a date with ANY of them... :twisted:


Wasn't Woff's son named Johny? :twisted:


Indeed.
"Face it, Johnny, seduction skills just aren't genetic in your family."


Johnny: "Dad, I can't get a date for the prom."
Col. Wolfe: "Neither can I, son..."
Johnny: "Uhhhmmmm...but, Mom..."
Col. Wolfe: "That IS a bit of problem..."


:lol: :lol:

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:So many Minmei clones...
And Colonel Woff's son can't get a date with ANY of them... :twisted:


Wasn't Woff's son named Johnny? :twisted:


Indeed.
"Face it, Johnny, seduction skills just aren't genetic in your family."


Nameless School staffer:" Excuse me Sir but I wanted to tell you that Johnny Woff will be arriving for his session in a few minutes. '

School Consuler T.R.Edwards:" Very good. "

*Nameless School Staffer leaves T.R.Edward's office*

* T.R.Edwards starts reading over Johnny Woff's school record *

* Crack! *

T.R.Edwards: " Come in the door's open. "

* CRASH!, SMASH!, CRACK! *

* T.R.Edwards sees the bloody blade of an axe being pulled out of what is left of the door to his consuling office to be replaced with a deranged and blood splattered face of a young boy. *

Johnny Woff: " Here's JOHNNY! "


:lol: :lol: :lol:

guardiandashi wrote:A new student with a "slight hair disorder" walks through the doors out of the office/registration area grumbling..
Sarah stupid people all I did was answer my age and occupation, and they make comments about child soldiers and send me to school... only good thing is they at least acknowledged that I had some language skills, and some "military skills" sigh, lets see what classes I got:
first period remedial English
second period tutoring session, 1st grade English?
3rd period tutoring session Remedial Reading English?
4th Period Physical Education
Lunch
5th Period Home Economics
6th Period Shop (wielding)
7th period Varies Military/survival prep
after school ....

Spoiler:
Player: __________________________________
Name: _____Sarah________________________
Alignment: ___Scrupulous__________________
Hit Point: _50___Current HP: _______
_SDC:___172 Current: __SDC:_______
MDC 222 Current MDC __________
Level: _1___ EXP:______________
O.C.C.: _____Dogboy/PSI-hound Wolf____
Breed: __WOLF______Horror Factor: _____
IQ: __28 Skill bonus:________14__%
ME: __20 Save vs. psi/ins.:_____3___
MA: __15 Trust/intimidate:________%
SN PS: __46 Damage bonus +__+31 *___
PP: __29 Strike/parry/dodge +___7__
SN PE: __44 Coma/death/poison: 44%_/_+8
PB: __26 Charm/impress: ______80_%
Spd: 74/5 feet/minute: _____4440/300____
P.P.E.:___15_/______I.S.P.:__70___/______

Age: __5__Sex: ___Female
Height:7ft 7in_2.3368m Weight: _407lb 184.61kg__
Lift: ____________ Carry: ___________
Throw (max): _________ lbs ________ ft
Run: __47.72_mph ___4440__ft/min
______ft/melee _______ ft/attack
Hand-to-Hand: __Martial Arts____________
# of attacks: ____5___ Initiative: + _4_______
Strike: + ___8____ Parry: + __11____
Dodge: + 11______ Auto-dodge: + ______
Damage: + __31sdc__ Roll: + _6____
Disarm: + ______ Pull Punch: + ____
Punch: _6D6MDC_ Restrained punch: _1D6X10 SDC
Power Punch _2D6X10 MDC_____ 2D6 nip 5D6 Bite
Kick: _2D4____ Jump Kick: ___________
Flip: ______1D6___________________
Knock out: __nat 20_______ Critical __________-20
Death Blow: ______________________

Armor 1: Armor 2:
__DC AR: __ Env: ____ __DC AR: __ Env: ____
Penalties: Penalties:
Notes: Notes:

Area T C Area T C
Body Body
Head Head
Arms Arms
Legs Legs




Saving Throws:
Spell (12) + Possession +
Ritual (16) + Horror +
Psionics (____) + Death + 44 %
Toxin (16) + Pain (14) +
Poison (14) + Perception +
Drugs (15) +
Insanity (12) +
Skills +lv % Skills +lv %
Language: American 1% _98_% Basic Electronics 5% 44_%
Language: Spanish 3% _69_% Boxing
Climbing 5% _69_% Gymnastics
Intelligence______ 4% _52_% Cooking 5% 49_%
Land Navigation 4% _ 60_% Swimming 5% 64_%
Pilot: Hovercraft 5% _ 74_% Sniper
Read Sensory Equip 5% _54_% Wrestling
Running Forced March
Wilderness Survival 5% _54_% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% ________________ ____ ____%
OCC Related ________________ ____ ____%
Armorer 3% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
Basic Mechanics(**) 5% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
First Aid 5% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
Parachuting 5% 64_% ________________ ____ ____%
Interrogation Tech. 5% 39_% ________________ ____ ____%
Recognize Weapon 5% 49_% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% ________________ ____ ____%
________________ ___ ____% Climb Rope /Rappel 2% 74_%
________________ ___ ____% Basic Prowl 44_%
________________ ___ ____% Back Flip 2% 84_%
________________ ___ ____% work Parallel bars/rings 3% 74_%
________________ ___ ____% Sense of Balance 2% 64_%

Weapon Damage St/Par
Aim/Bst Ammo Range ROF
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/
Notes:
/

Weapon Proficiencies Str/Aim Thr/Bst Par/Rng Dam/Rate
Energy Pistol
Energy Rifle
Sword
Heavy MD Weapons














Cybernetics/Bionics/Biowizardry:________________
______________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________

Vehicle log
Type: ______________________________________
Crew: ______________________________________
Max speed: _________ Terrain: _________________
Max range: _______ Engine Type: _______________
Length: ________ Weight: __________
Area T C Area T C
Main Body
Pilot Comp.
Tires
Weapon Dam St/Br RoF Range Ammo
/

/

/


Vehicle Notes:_______________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________
___________________________________________

Psionics Range Duration save I.S.P.
Sense Evil ____ _______ ___ ____
Sense Magic ______ ____ _______ ___ ____
Sixth Sense ______ ____ _______ ___ ____
Empathy (rec. only) ____ _______ ___ ____
Total Recall ____ _______ ___ 2
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____
_________________ ____ _______ ___ ____

Equipment: A suit of heavy: (50 MDC. standard) Dog Pack DPM Riot armor (Note:Full environmental armor IS generally reserved for officers, Dog
Boy Special Forces and special assignments.). uniform, dress uniform.
tinted goggles or non-environmental helmet with or without visor. PDD pocket audio recorder, pocket laser distancer. flashlight,
pocket mirror. cigarette lighter. 100 feet (30.5 m) of lightweight
rope. small hammer. four spikes. 1D6 animal snares, infrared distancing
binoculars. portable language translator, survival knife, a
pair of Vibro-Knives or Vibro-Claws a Vibro-Saber, C-18 laser pistol. a C-12 laser assault rifle. both with telescopic sight and nightvision scope, four additional E-Clips for the weapon, plus knapsack, backpack, utility belt. air tilter. gas mask, and canteen.
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
Credits: CS: _____________ BM: _____________ Other:___________
Metals & Gems: _____________________________________________
Tradable goods: _____________________________________________
Other: _____________________________________________________

Notes:__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Dog Boy Abilities:
Sense Psychic & Magic:
Track Specific Psychic Scent: _____/_____% Range ______/______ft
+20% with blood, hair, or clothing, -10% near strong PPE source,
-1/2 near Ley Line
Recognize Psychic Scent: __4%__/__24__%
Sense Supernatural Being, ID Creature + 2% 76_%
Superior Sense of Smell ½ penalties while blind (-5 S/P/D):
ID Common & Strong Scent: ______ ft _84__%
Recognize & ID Specific Scent ______ ft _68___%
Track by Specific Scent Alone: Range ______/______ ft Roll every
1000 ft a failed roll loses trail 2 out of 3 rolls to relocate the trail.
Keen Sense of Hearing: 75% better than humans
Good Sight: 200-270 degree field of vision. Can see in color.

Special Abilities and Information:_PE as applies to weight/load and exertion 2x human 1/2 fatigue dogboy, 1/2 fatigue extreme PE, can be active for 6+hrs due to supernatural PE________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________

Cries and all because I was honest when I told that person I was 5 years old, and I didn't know where I was after I stumbled through a RIFT.


:lol:
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