FUNNIEST IDEAS FOR RIFTS CARACTERS

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Sep 21, 2008 2:03 pm

Balabanto wrote:There's an idea. Characters go to South America and get paid in Cacao beans. Snicker. That's pretty funny.

'Snickers'...and 'M&Ms'...

Nikoli · Unread post by **Nikoli** » Sun Sep 21, 2008 5:35 pm

I have a new player in my rifts game (new to rifts, not rpg's).
She's got a hatchling Royal Frilled Dragon who is about 30 days old. Before attacking she asks the Dragon Cat the Knight of the Rose has for a mount if such-and-such is tasty, if yes, she atacks with the party, if not she licks the nearest inanimate object to test it for tastiness.

Library Ogre · Unread post by **Library Ogre** » Sun Sep 21, 2008 6:44 pm

I had a new-born fire dragon hatchling in a game. They met me when I "pounced on" (read: high-speed tackled) the Tattooed Man while they were on an assault mission. I got stuck in a TK Forcefield (or, as they came to refer to it, my "hamster ball"), decided I didn't like it and filled it with flame until it melted.

Throughout the game, I showed remarkable lack of regard for people's privacy and property. I would telepathically scan people's brains for things to change into (leading to a Japanese schoolgirl pushing a bunch of boxes through a Rift, since they objected to me turning into a huge, naked, ogre, covered in tattoos). I also pioneered the teleportation attack; teleport onto someone's back and start biting.

I played it as a combination of a hyperactive 7 year old genius, and a large cat.

gaaahhhh · Unread post by **gaaahhhh** » Sun Sep 21, 2008 8:05 pm

A Grackle Tooth Vagabond.

Balabanto · Unread post by **Balabanto** » Tue Sep 23, 2008 1:29 pm

Ratling Cyberknight. That one pretty much says it all. What the !@#$%$@! do you DO with him? Assuming you can even generate it. (Nearly impossible)

Balabanto · Unread post by **Balabanto** » Thu Sep 25, 2008 11:43 am

Pixie Titan Juicer

johnkretzer · Unread post by **johnkretzer** » Sun Sep 28, 2008 11:27 pm

I played for one session a Coyle Hyperion Juicer who called himself...well that would give it away, I'll say that one of his goals in life was to find the Acme Factory...

Unfortunbaly the campaign went on hiatus and I lost the character sheet and had to gen another character

Giant2005 · Unread post by **Giant2005** » Mon Sep 29, 2008 11:30 am

A Demi-God Crazy who doesn't realise he isn't a Crazy.
The Crazy augmentation didn't take because of his regeneration but because he has no idea of his divine ancestry, believes his supernatural abilities are due to the augmentation. Acts insane and doesn't realise he is acting.

Balabanto · Unread post by **Balabanto** » Tue Sep 30, 2008 4:01 pm

Same Sex Preferred Simvan Monster Rider.

Now, the thing that gets me about this one isn't the same sex preferred. You can do whatever you want with that.

It's the pink monster.

Library Ogre · Unread post by **Library Ogre** » Tue Sep 30, 2008 8:51 pm

Huggthedwarf wrote:An octoman ley line walker - a pb of 4, and the seduce skill. Used frequently. Oh yeah, he thinks he's all that. And he likes blind warrior women.

Hey, they works pretty well. What's his MA like?

Rathorc Lemenger · Thu Oct 02, 2008 8:53 am

What about a mutant T-rex that (unfortunantly or fortunantly) has naturally occuring purple skin &likes to eat sweets, & who's also kind to kids??

Signed,
Rathorc Lemenger.

Balabanto · Unread post by **Balabanto** » Thu Oct 02, 2008 12:14 pm

Look. If he has one eye and one horn, and wings, and eats people, I'm your guy.

He has to be able to try and get a job in a Rock and Roll band, though.

The Galactus Kid · Thu Oct 02, 2008 12:34 pm

I would totally roll up a new character. hahaha.

Snake Eyes · Unread post by **Snake Eyes** » Thu Oct 02, 2008 12:35 pm

Balabanto wrote:Pixie Titan Juicer

eeesh, now thats freaky......

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Oct 05, 2008 4:24 pm

Crazy w/ Multiple Personalities(oh yeah, you've all heard this before....) based on...The Muppet Show....

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Oct 06, 2008 2:49 pm

Flakbait wrote:I once played a Crazy with three personalities. The "normal" one, and two others: a British demo expert with a thing for very expensive Scotch, fiendish traps, and working with HE while blitzed out of his mind. The other personality? A pyromaniac Burster who hated the Brit. If it weren't for good money and the body armor it can buy...

-------------
Flakbait
Basher 410 has three in the breeze, over the trees, last hop for a full stop.

Ouch...'accidental' premature fuze-lighting and boobytrapped wallets I take it?

Rathorc Lemenger · Tue Oct 07, 2008 6:53 am

Oh yeah??? I got one better. Imagine a Crazy that had multiple personalities based off of Jeff Dunham's Puppets. If your wondering who I'm talking about, go to Youtube & type in Jeff Dunham.

Signed,
Rathorc Lemenger.

LostOne · Unread post by **LostOne** » Tue Oct 07, 2008 9:02 am

Heh, I can see it now.

CS Soldier: Freeze!
Crazy: Freeze yerself, you moron!
Crazy again, different voice: Am I pissing you off-ff-ff-a?
Fight ensues, during one point the Crazy stabs a soldier with a vibroblade.
Crazy: It's a deadboy...on a steek!
Eventually the crazy is subdued by a squad of soldiers and tossed in prison.
Crazy: We love it here!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Oct 07, 2008 10:02 am

Rathorc Lemenger wrote:Oh yeah??? I got one better. Imagine a Crazy that had multiple personalities based off of Jeff Dunham's Puppets. If your wondering who I'm talking about, go to Youtube & type in Jeff Dunham.

Signed,
Rathorc Lemenger.

The mind boggles...

Balabanto · Unread post by **Balabanto** » Tue Oct 07, 2008 11:15 am

Here's another one that's kind of absurd and ridiculous.

Gromek Dragon Juicer.

Wildfire · Unread post by **Wildfire** » Wed Oct 08, 2008 8:11 pm

My two favorite Crazies were named Hanz and franz and wanted to Pump You Up,
However they kept breaking people and objects

They saw an old tape on VHS of a comedy show and they thought it was them nevermind they have blue and purple skin

Balabanto · Unread post by **Balabanto** » Thu Oct 09, 2008 9:29 am

Hanz and Franz really do exist. Reread your old source material.

Kevin beat you to it. They're kind of old, now though.

Here's one for you if you like that sort of thing:

Elf Nader! He's a powerfully built Elf with a low PB who wears green converted Sunaj assassin armor. He has a green cape, a vibroblade, and sneaks around blowing up Coalition factories that despoil his precious wilderness.

Rathorc Lemenger · Thu Oct 09, 2008 11:42 pm

*tries to picture the scene but couldn't. Then proceeds to shake head.* You know what??? That's probably something that Taalismn would come up with.

Signed,
Rathorc Lemenger.

The Galactus Kid · Fri Oct 10, 2008 11:27 am

I can't tell you the last time I killed a character. The last time a PC died in our game, it was our GM killing his girlfriends PC. We were all like "OOOOOOHHHHH, sleeping on the couch."

Balabanto · Unread post by **Balabanto** » Fri Oct 10, 2008 2:40 pm

In Rifts, I used to kill someone about once every two sessions.

In D+D, I kill 1-2 PC's a week.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Oct 10, 2008 5:59 pm

From the Schizoid Crazy Files...
Crazy with Star Wars Personalities....(Hardened Warrior)Bobba Fett; never takes off his armor...(Gluttonous Pig) Jabba the Hut...wants to eat until he bursts at the seams...

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Oct 10, 2008 6:02 pm

farfairer wrote:To words:

Slurmph Paratrooper

'nuff said.

"Did somebody just throw a garbage bag on the roof?"

Good god...this has 'Schlock: Mercenary" written all over it...

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 9:43 am

The 'Bargain Bin at the Biowizards'"?
Oh, that is RIFE with darkly humorous possibilities... :twisted:

Balabanto · Unread post by **Balabanto** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 10:53 am

Yeah. The Bimbo Beauty Parasite +1d8 PB, -2d6 IQ

Now add this to...a Dirari Ecto Man?????

Yeah. All sorts of possibilities.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 12:01 pm

Balabanto wrote:Yeah. The Bimbo Beauty Parasite +1d8 PB, -2d6 IQ

.

Looks like a blonde wig?

I had a Playboy Bunny Cottentail Parasite that looked like a bunny tail at the base of the spine...effectively flooded the person's nervous system with endorphins, and was VERY addictive...Hurt like a bastard if it was torn off, since it was attached to the central nervous system...

Balabanto · Unread post by **Balabanto** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 9:42 am

I put a pair of bouncers at a bar in the new west. A mining borg named "Shag' and a Dogboy named "Scoob."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 6:06 pm

Balabanto wrote:I put a pair of bouncers at a bar in the new west. A mining borg named "Shag' and a Dogboy named "Scoob."

'Shaggy' with a pneumatic piledriver arm? That's SCARY... :eek:

I can see 'em in a 'The Hills Have Eyes' situation...

Balabanto · Unread post by **Balabanto** » Mon Oct 13, 2008 4:13 pm

Well, you figure the Mining Borg has the scanning equipment to pick up any problem cybernetics, and the dogboy has the power to locate magic, psychics, etc. And they can frisk people.

So, here's another doozy.

Larhold Barbarian Rogue Scholar. I don't know what it would do, but clearly, he's an exile from his own race. Played with a snooty british accent, this could be a TON of laughs.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Oct 13, 2008 6:14 pm

Balabanto wrote:Well, you figure the Mining Borg has the scanning equipment to pick up any problem cybernetics, and the dogboy has the power to locate magic, psychics, etc. And they can frisk people.

So, here's another doozy.

Larhold Barbarian Rogue Scholar. I don't know what it would do, but clearly, he's an exile from his own race. Played with a snooty british accent, this could be a TON of laughs.

"Oh dear; another heathen who doesn't appreciate that Shakespeare is best appreciated in the original Larhold tongue...*sigh* I am surrounded by culture-less ignorami...."

johnkretzer · Unread post by **johnkretzer** » Mon Oct 13, 2008 6:54 pm

I think this might be borderline disturbing but here it is anyway....

A Slurmph Saloon Girl

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Oct 13, 2008 7:19 pm

johnkretzer wrote:I think this might be borderline disturbing but here it is anyway....

A Slurmph Saloon Girl

How about a Slurmph Master Chef(from the Rifter)?

Balabanto · Unread post by **Balabanto** » Sun Nov 09, 2008 5:15 am

Although I despise the "A crazy who" thread, this one might deserve special mention. It's VERY Short lived, mind you.

A crazy who wears a trenchcoat, and roams the Vampire Kingdoms. Hanging from the inside of the trenchcoat are about 500 wooden, silver, and gold crosses. As the Vampire sees them, he shouts "Need some spare Jesus?" and runs away.

(SHIFTY) · Unread post by **(SHIFTY)** » Sun Nov 09, 2008 1:46 pm

That weird scarecrow creature from the rifts conversion book with a love for chainsaws! :lol:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Nov 09, 2008 3:12 pm

Vampire swimming pool salesman...

Library Ogre · Unread post by **Library Ogre** » Sun Nov 09, 2008 3:58 pm

Your mom.

Come on. Admit it. That would be a hilarious Rifts character.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Nov 09, 2008 4:38 pm

Mark Hall wrote:Your mom.

Come on. Admit it. That would be a hilarious Rifts character.

Use the Godling RCC from Pantheons of the Megaverse or the Immortals from Powers Unlimited(Divine or Demonic Beings). PLus any advanced defenses your character has are effectively nullified when facing Mom...Horror Factor and M.A. take serious hits when your mother publicly scolds you, lectures you, or...well..mothers you...

Thor: "But...Mooommmm!!!! The giants STARTED it!"

Library Ogre · Mon Nov 10, 2008 12:30 am

taalismn wrote:
Mark Hall wrote:Your mom.

Come on. Admit it. That would be a hilarious Rifts character.

Use the Godling RCC from Pantheons of the Megaverse or the Immortals from Powers Unlimited(Divine or Demonic Beings). PLus any advanced defenses your character has are effectively nullified when facing Mom...Horror Factor and M.A. take serious hits when your mother publicly scolds you, lectures you, or...well..mothers you...

Thor: "But...Mooommmm!!!! The giants STARTED it!"

Especially funny since Thor's mom was a giant. (Odin got around)

Balabanto · Unread post by **Balabanto** » Mon Nov 10, 2008 2:50 pm

Ganka Rogue Botanist.

It doesn't seem that wrong on the surface, but a plant that roams around collecting other plants and putting them under glass is actually kind of cannibalistic and amusing.

Library Ogre · Unread post by **Library Ogre** » Mon Nov 10, 2008 4:15 pm

Balabanto wrote:Ganka Rogue Botanist.

It doesn't seem that wrong on the surface, but a plant that roams around collecting other plants and putting them under glass is actually kind of cannibalistic and amusing.

No less than a human who wanders around an puts other mammals under glass.

Balabanto · Unread post by **Balabanto** » Mon Nov 10, 2008 4:23 pm

That is true, but it could produce some interesting RP.

Balabanto · Unread post by **Balabanto** » Tue Nov 11, 2008 1:10 am

Uhh...wow. That is...the most crazy thing I've ever heard. It's not funny...just...sad.

Tonight, for instance, I ran a Rifts adventure for my players.

The PC's were hired by a Leprechaun to retrieve his pot of gold!

Unfortunately...

It was a golden toilet. A 500 pound golden toilet.

Library Ogre · Unread post by **Library Ogre** » Tue Nov 11, 2008 1:28 am

Balabanto wrote:Uhh...wow. That is...the most crazy thing I've ever heard. It's not funny...just...sad.

Tonight, for instance, I ran a Rifts adventure for my players.

The PC's were hired by a Leprechaun to retrieve his pot of gold!

Unfortunately...

It was a golden toilet. A 500 pound golden toilet.

That's beautiful.

Rathorc Lemenger · Wed Nov 12, 2008 7:41 am

[quote="Mark Hall"][quote="Balabanto"]Uhh...wow. That is...the most crazy thing I've ever heard. It's not funny...just...sad.

Tonight, for instance, I ran a Rifts adventure for my players.

The PC's were hired by a Leprechaun to retrieve his pot of gold!

Unfortunately...

It was a golden toilet. A 500 pound golden toilet.[/quote]

That's beautiful.[/quote]

Funny, I actually got a chuckle from that one.

Signed,
Rathorc Lemenger.

shiiv-a · Unread post by **shiiv-a** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 10:03 pm

well .. first off ..

Have an old growth forest ..
Add in hidden speakers that are wireless and echo 'whispers' for the creepy feeling
Add in various 'old tech' traps for the higher tech hideout ..
*leg rope traps .. dead falls .. pit traps with 14 inches of muddy sludge

. . .
Now add in a MOD .. and then falling into the pit ..
Now add in the character's one by one .. who follow the MOD anywhere they go .. and have them land ON said character [after all EVERYONE wants to be where the Moderator of the site is .. better treasure . more exciting things happen that way]
End result .. a wonderful thing/game called sardines .. and since the walls are slick gooey mud .. climbing out wont really help .. unless you're clever and can think your way out

I did it in a game and had the most wonderful time watching people rushing to 'save *names* char' that they would jump the bush and fall .. landing and mooshing the others before them down again

well .. maybe the others didn't find it as funny .. but it was worth a good giggle

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Nov 13, 2008 8:32 pm

U.S.Advanced Recon wrote:A changling with the Crazy O.C.C. afflicted with mulitple personality.

Ouch....and EVERY one of them has to have face-time...