Robotech Blooper Reels

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Fri Nov 09, 2007 12:54 am

Get him to appear there in Spiderman as a new villian. Then they could kill him off really close.

glitterboy2098 · Fri Nov 09, 2007 11:03 am

Lt Colonel Fury wrote:
[soapbox]As for the superhero movies killing off villains what is with that trend? It started with the first Michael Keaton Batman movie and just keeps rolling along. Don't these Hollywood types realize if you kill off the main nemesis you kill the whole dang story?[/soapbox]

movies have the benefit of being self contained plots, and not needing a reoccuring villian. this applies even to things like trilogies, which can be considered a movie in 3 parts. (and usually those have a big bad and a little bad. little bads are 1 per movie, and almost always die by the end. big bads only die in the last movie..)

comics, unless a limited run, usually need those reoccuring characters to give options for future plots.

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Fri Nov 09, 2007 2:18 pm

Very good Colonel Fury!

you caught me I wasn't doing G&S. I was thinking of Yellow Beard and Cabin Boy when I wrote that.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Nov 09, 2007 9:07 pm

Macross:

-Roy Fokker has just pulled Vermillion off the flight line while playing parallel chicken in jeeps...Vermillion Squadron has just pulled to a stop while Fokker's jeep disappears up the ramp...

Max: "Whatta guy..."
(Camera focus on Max, Ben, and Rick's faces as they hear a screech of brakes, a slamming of metal from somewhere off-camera...then Ben and Rick duck as a jeep tire comes bounding over the windshield and off into the distance behind them...There is the distinct sound of yelling...Roy's voice is readily recognizable, but it sounds like Lisa's in counterpoint...)

Rick: "Yep...great pilot, lousy driver...Pop was always bailing him out on traffic tickets..."

Comrade Corsarius · Sat Nov 10, 2007 7:14 am

taalismn wrote:Macross:

-Roy Fokker has just pulled Vermillion off the flight line while playing parallel chicken in jeeps...Vermillion Squadron has just pulled to a stop while Fokker's jeep disappears up the ramp...

Roy: Smoke me a kipper, I'll be back for breakfast!

Max: Whatta guy...

Ben: What a guy

Claudia: What a guy

Rick: What a guy

Arnold J Fokker: Smeghead.

Comrade Corsarius · Sat Nov 10, 2007 7:30 am

Breetai: When a human's not engaged in his employment

Exedore & crew: His employment

Breetai: Convoluting his sad human little plans

Crew: Little plans

Breetai: His capacity for battle and enjoyment

Crew: And Enjoyment

Breetai: Is just the same as any other man's.

Crew: Other man's.

Breetai: Our feelings we with difficulty smother

Crew: 'culty smother

Breetai: As we fight our battles to make sure they're won

Crew: Sure they're won

Breetai: Ah! Take one consideration with another!

Crew: With Another.

Breetai: A Zentraedi's lot is not a happy one

All: Ahhh-ahhhh!
When the Masters and our battles do be done, do be done
A Zentraedi's lot is not a happy one.

Breetai: When the enterprising Invid's not a fighting

Crew: Not a-fighting

Breetai: When the ship is not all covered up with grime

Crew: Up with grime

Breetai: He loves to eat that protoculture flower

Crew: Culture flower

Breetai: And see visions and have a real good time.

Crew: Real good time

Breetai: When the Masters' finished cloning one another

Crew: One another

Beetai: They love to fly their ships right near the sun

Crew: Near the sun

Breetai: Ah! Take one consideration with another

Crew: With another

Breetai: A Zentraedi's lot is not a happy one.

All: Ahh-Ahh!
When the masters and the battles do be done, do be done
a Zentraedi's lot is not a happy one.

(harmonise now, barbershop-style)
A Hap-peeeee oneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Nov 10, 2007 10:11 am

Ten Protoculture Cell Opera?

Comrade Corsarius · Sat Nov 10, 2007 9:04 pm

I'm thinking of more, but I'm not quite sure yet.. So far I've gotten up to

Dolza: Then Breetai, let your escort, lion-heated,
be summoned to receive your leader's blessing
Ere they depart upon their dread adventure.

Breetai: Dolza, they come.

Breetai: Ah! When the masters say the word

All Zentraedi: Ta ran ta ra! ta ran ta ra!

Breetai: Do they struggle to be heard?

Zentraedi: Ta ran ta ra!

........

Just making up Robotech: The Musical as I'm going along and hoping not to be haunted by the ghosts of Gilbert and Sullivan.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Nov 10, 2007 9:21 pm

G&B wanted to write serious stuff....but by all means lampoon 'em...

Flashback....

Young Rick Hunter is running after his 'big brother' flying away in a Fokker biplane...Scarf streaming behind him, Roy looks back over his shoulder with a cocky grin...
Just in time to slam his plane into the sky-motiff billboard looming over the meadows...

AuroraKet · Unread post by **AuroraKet** » Mon Nov 12, 2007 2:44 pm

Lotsa great stuff, as always. Keep it coming

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Nov 12, 2007 3:10 pm

Fight breaks out in the Little White Dragon...Max and Rick are being pressed back, and Kyle has yet to enter the fight...

Suddenly...

FWOOOSSSHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Everybody dives for the floor as a fireball shoots out from the kitchen...

Enter Minmei's Uncle Max wearing his apron and hat, but with goggles and a flamethrower on his back...

UM: "Anybody want to fight anymore in MY place?! Come'n'get some!!!!"

Kyle: (crouching behind a table with Rick and Max)"Now I remember why I left home...."

Aunt Lena: "Never should have let him watch that 'Star Trek' episode....he wanted so badly to call our family restarunat 'Ten-Forward' after that...."

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Mon Nov 12, 2007 5:19 pm

LOL Some more great stuff! I hope we get more of it! sooner rather than later.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Nov 13, 2007 11:25 am

Macross:

-A lone Quadrono approaches the SDF-1 in the darkness over Quebec Sector...
Quadrono Pilot: "Are you sure of this, Miriyia? It is very dangerous..."
Miriya:(Micronized and in a transport pod)"Yes, I must...LOOK OUT!!!"
The Quadrono piles into a hillside in the dark, losing its grip on the transport pod, which goes flipping end over end into the air---
Miriya:"YOWYOWYOWYowyowyow---"
WHUNCH
-pod hits hillside, proceeds to tumble down hill-
"Yah9ouch0aaaaa(oofh)aaaaa(gah)aaaaa(ack)aaa(erk)---"
dingdangdingdingclankpop
-rolls down hill--
"urgaurgaurgaurgaurgaurgashabbaddashabbadashabbada"
-Finally rolls to a stop after bouncing over a retaining fence-
Pop*Hisssss*
"Ack----(crawl)---barf---(stumble)---nerg"
HOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNKKKKKKKKKK
(Headlights. Deer. Oncoming Eighteen Wheeler)
"Oh shi-"
*POW*

Whiteness....Full body traction and mummy wrappings...IV drip....paaaainnnnkilllllerrrrrsssssss.....
Doctor with clipboard making notes: "Patient exhibiting constant delusional state in addition to extensive cranial injuries---claims she is alien warrior seeking to assassinate human champion who bested her."
Writes out: "Forward to Pysch Evaluation"

Nxla666 · Unread post by **Nxla666** » Tue Nov 13, 2007 1:14 pm

Micronised Zentraedi rebel reciting instructions for tossing hand grenades to group of comrades.

"Pull pin and throw."

Zentraedi recruit: "OK........ done, but what do I do with the big part*BOOM*

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Nov 13, 2007 2:38 pm

Khyron's cornered Rick Hunter on the deck of the SDF-1...He shoots his way through a couple of Destroids, and is lining on Rick, when...
A giant rabbit float comes sailing out of an airlock and crashes down on top of Khyron's Glaug, killing him instantly...
Rick quietly blesses the Captain for letting the civilians have an Easter parade...

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Tue Nov 13, 2007 5:30 pm

LOL More great ones! That must be one heavy float. More please!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Nov 13, 2007 8:34 pm

RDF Diplomat: "Lemme get this straight....the Society for the Preservation of Conservative Wholesome Human Family Values is complaining about the 'shamelss alien barbarians ruthlessly and wantonly broadcasting corrupting smut all over the landscape'?"

Lesser Functionary: "That's right, sir."

Diplomat: "Anybody tried telling them that was a sex-ed course, and that the old drive-in movie theater was the only way we could show it to a hundred-plus fifty footers in any comfort, considering that most of them were even more shocked than those prudes could ever be? And half of them required reviving afterwards with cold water hoses and pepper spray?"

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Wed Nov 14, 2007 12:28 pm

LOL Great one Taalismn! Please keep them coming! :lol:

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Wed Nov 14, 2007 2:14 pm

:::In the distance you see a black and orange painted officers pod with a bill in place of its cannon normally mounted on it's top most surface. It is standing in a small lake. Occasionally it lowers it's bill into the water to seemingly get a drink. It then looks around as if expecting something.:::

:::Over in the distance there is a sign that says "Duck hunting season open".

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Nov 14, 2007 6:30 pm

Bridge Bunny: "Major Yosemite...please refrain from discharging firearms on the bridge?"(from behind chair)

Y.S: "Oops...gosh darn..."

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Thu Nov 15, 2007 1:28 pm

If not B. Bunny, it might be his cousin E. Bunny.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Nov 15, 2007 6:48 pm

"...Knew I shouldn't have made that right turn at Alburque RDF AF..."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Nov 17, 2007 8:40 pm

Scene of a casino in Macross City...camera tracks through high-falutin' big spenders, glamorous ladies, opulent surroundings, fortunes being made and lost, and settles on a tall, broad-shouldered figure in a black tuxedo, who turns around and smoothly declares...

"Dixon...Ben Dixon."

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Mon Nov 19, 2007 3:39 pm

LOL! Pretty good one! I had a friend generate a character in Rifts. We worked it out that he is a son of Ben Dixon from another universe where Ben was transported to Rift's earth instead of dying. There he fathered a child with and unspecified woman.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Nov 19, 2007 8:36 pm

Aramanthus wrote:LOL! Pretty good one! I had a friend generate a character in Rifts. We worked it out that he is a son of Ben Dixon from another universe where Ben was transported to Rift's earth instead of dying. There he fathered a child with and unspecified woman.

We had a scenario where Rick Hunter became a CosmoKnight, Max was bitten by a werewolf, Ben became a Dragonball-like uber-martial artist, and Lisa was saved by a race of intelligent starships and made into one of them...

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Nov 19, 2007 8:40 pm

Scott Bernard lands his Alpha, steps out of it , touches a button on his universal remote thingie...
His Alpha folds up and shrinks down into a portable stereo, which Scott picks up and walks away with...

Rand:(stepping into frame) "And folks were wondering why Soundwave wasn't in Michael Bay's movie...."

AuroraKet · Unread post by **AuroraKet** » Mon Nov 19, 2007 11:46 pm

Good ones, always.

Heehee.

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Tue Nov 20, 2007 3:23 pm

LOL I wondered when someone would use the SciFi commercial. Good use of a SciFi commercial for Robotech.. What awards for these bloopers? What do we call it....... The Reflex?

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Tue Nov 20, 2007 4:23 pm

Yeah that sounds more fun then mine. Maybe my suggestion should be for a more serious stuff such as funny Robotech based comercials.

Scene:::Two men standing side by side in front of a valkyrie. And announer starts off.::: "Today we're going to have this man talk about why he switched his flight insurance to Gecko. In order to do this we have hired a famous person to interpet what this normal mans reason into something you the audience will understand." :::Names flash by each of the men. The name of the one of the two men is Ben Dixon. The star is Leslie Nielson.:::

Ben Dixon::: "I was flying a mission when the zentraedi started attacking us again....." :::He is interupted by Leslie Nielson at this point.:::

Leslie Nielson, very loudly in an especially squeaky voice.::: "I was looking for a place to pick up a hot date. I didn't care what shade of lip stick I was wearing. I made sure to wear the slinkiest shortest skirt I could find at the latex shop..... :::At this point Ben starts getting red faced. Meanwhile Leslie keep prattling on and on.:::

Ben Dixon blanches at on point and coughs out.::: "That was nothing but a lie. It was a bet. I had lost a bet."

Leslie Nielson::: "Sure I lost the bet with that zentraedi about how much alcohol it took me to get drunk. So I bet him that I could steal Khyron's underwear while he was wearing it." :::Ben blushes heavily at this point.:::

Ben starts making up excuses continuously at this point, then the announcer returns.:::

Announcer::: "When you need cheap flight insurance, call on Gecko Insurance. We like flyers!" Some of something snapping loudly." :::The camera pans over to a giant gecko which is happily devouring something vaguely plane shaped. A wing protrudes from it's mouth for a second before it swallows it's prey.:::

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Nov 20, 2007 6:38 pm

After that last piece, we have to ask:
Was Ben Dixon's death REALLY an accident?
Or did he WANT to die?

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Tue Nov 20, 2007 6:40 pm

ROFLMAO!! I'm sorry I had to write it like a twisted commercial!! :lol:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Nov 20, 2007 6:40 pm

MInmei's agent: "No, no, NO! We're trying for Fresh and Innocent for your first concert!!"
Minmei: (clad in leather bodysuit, chains, and a spiked out fright hairstyle) "Hey, it worked for Joan Jett! What difference does it really make?!"

...and thus Minmei lost 90% of her potential American fanbase...

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Tue Nov 20, 2007 6:52 pm

LOL Very good Taalismn!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Nov 20, 2007 7:44 pm

Breetai's ship powers up its main cannon for action. The hull splits open...then..
*KRAK*

....The whole lower hull goes drifting free into space.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Nov 20, 2007 8:01 pm

Breetai:"Somebody get out there with some polystyrene cement...not that cheap rubber adhesive....quick! Chop-chop!"

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Wed Nov 21, 2007 12:09 pm

If only Breetai had gone with Gecko Insurance this would have ended up better for him and Exedore!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Nov 21, 2007 9:59 pm

Post-Shadow Chronicles 1:

General Reinhardt: "So, Captain Grant, how is your new crew working out? I know they've been thrown together on an unfamiliar ship with little formal training aside from their previous units, but..."

(suddenly there's a flash of light and a nude Scott Bernard and Ariel appear on top of the table between the two men...obviously engaged in extracurricular activity and oblivious to what else is going on...another flash and they're gone...there's another flash from the hall outside, only this time there's Jean Grant's 'YIPE!' and another flash..)

Captain Grant:(deadpan and looking at Reinhardt's flummoxed expression) "Getting to know each other but still needing practice with their capabilities, I'd say."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Nov 21, 2007 10:58 pm

Vince Grant: "So how's Louie?"
Jean Grant: "Responding to treatment and expected to make a full recovery in time."
Vince: "Did he say how the heck he managed to get nearly electrocuted?"
Jean: "That's a matter of doctor-patient confidentiality, I'm afraid."

Nxla666 · Unread post by **Nxla666** » Thu Nov 22, 2007 11:49 am

taalismn wrote:Vince Grant: "So how's Louie?"
Jean Grant: "Responding to treatment and expected to make a full recovery in time."
Vince: "Did he say how the heck he managed to get nearly electrocuted?"
Jean: "That's a matter of doctor-patient confidentiality, I'm afraid."

"My girl robot, hehehehe." 8-)

AuroraKet · Unread post by **AuroraKet** » Thu Nov 22, 2007 11:51 am

taalismn wrote:Post-Shadow Chronicles 1:

General Reinhardt: "So, Captain Grant, how is your new crew working out? I know they've been thrown together on an unfamiliar ship with little formal training aside from their previous units, but..."

(suddenly there's a flash of light and a nude Scott Bernard and Ariel appear on top of the table between the two men...obviously engaged in extracurricular activity and oblivious to what else is going on...another flash and they're gone...there's another flash from the hall outside, only this time there's Jean Grant's 'YIPE!' and another flash..)

Captain Grant:(deadpan and looking at Reinhardt's flummoxed expression) "Getting to know each other but still needing practice with their capabilities, I'd say."

That could get... interesting.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Nov 22, 2007 3:18 pm

-Maia Sterling's walking by one of the electronics labs and hears from within...
whoopwhoopwhoopwhoopwhoopwhoopwhoopwhoopwhoop

...She looks in to see Janice sitting in a lotus position on the floor, eyes closed in meditation, while Louie is sitting in a swivel-chair, spinning around at high speed...Both are fully clothed...

whoopwhoopwhoopwhoopwhoopwhoopwhoopwhoopwhoop

Maia shakes her head and continues walking on by...Some things she DOESN'T want to know...

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Nov 22, 2007 3:22 pm

Nxla666 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Vince Grant: "So how's Louie?"
Jean Grant: "Responding to treatment and expected to make a full recovery in time."
Vince: "Did he say how the heck he managed to get nearly electrocuted?"
Jean: "That's a matter of doctor-patient confidentiality, I'm afraid."

"My girl robot, hehehehe."

God help the 15th if Louie ever went into ID theft!

Grant: "What's the situation, gentlemen?"
Nichols: "Well, we're badly hurt, but if we can get past the last two gumpas, and grab that strawberry, we'll be back up to full strength."
Grant: "*...*....Nichols, don't use the tactical boards for your video game marathons anymore>"

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Nov 22, 2007 3:23 pm

Dairugger XV wrote:Remind me to never drink anything while reading posts on this thread. I have to clean my monitor now.

I tend to have that effect on people when I come out into a good light...

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Nov 23, 2007 6:16 pm

-Micronian Cultural Contamination Spreads Through the Zentraedi Fleet:

Zentraedi Trooper: "What s this micronian...card game?...called again?"
Rico: "I just realized something...'strip poker' is mor fun with females present."
Bron: "Agreed."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Nov 24, 2007 4:29 pm

Rook: "So what was this message you got?"
Rand: "Dunno...Scott just asked us to meet him here...Wonder where he is?"
(Pull back to see them right in the landing footprint of the descending Ark Angel...)

-Macross
(The 3 spies get cornered by the Bridge Bunnies)
Sammie: "So where you from?"
Rico: "Ah, we're from...WE work...we work over there! That's right!"(points blindly)
(The Bridge Bunnies follow the indicated direction, to see....Madame Macross's Marital and Oh-So-Consensual Activities Equipment Shoppe..)
Sammie: "Oh, so THAT'S where that place is!"
Vanessa: "Mind showing us where you...work?"
Kim: "Great! I really need to rebuild my...collection..."
(Meanwhile, Bron and Konda have got a good look at the display windows and have gone pale...)

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Nov 26, 2007 12:46 pm

whipped4073 wrote:ROTFLMAO!!!

Dear God...

the Bridge Bunnies in a toy shop...

Oh, my spleen is ready to burst now..

Worse...the Three Brave Zentraedi Spies in one...

Konda: (stuttering)"What...are...those..?!"
SNAP*CLICK
Vanessa: "Handcuffs..what else?"

Rico: "We've been MADE!!!!"
Bron: "WE'll tell you NOTHING!!!"
Store Proprietor: "Need help there?"
Sammie: "Nah, we're good..."

Kim: "Lock the door."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Nov 26, 2007 8:18 pm

...It's always the quiet ones...

(Shot of Konda, Bron, and Rico's faces in frozen rictuses of terror)

But let's face it...after over-shifts of imminent death and senseless violence in the deep dark void, RDF personnel have to vent some nervous energy...some more than ever..

(camera tracking through Officers' Quarters, up to a door marked 'Hayes, Lisa'...into the quarters, past a desk, into the bedroom, up to a closet...into the closet...
There, paralyzed between the hung uniforms and clothing is Rick Hunter...)

Rick Hunter: "...help me...."

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Tue Nov 27, 2007 6:42 pm

ROFLMAO!!! :lol:

Those were very funny!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Nov 27, 2007 6:59 pm

whipped4073 wrote:You mean the "repressed librarian" stereotype applies to older female commanding officers as well?

Hey, do we EVER see the female officers of the RDF carry firearms?
They're military, they gotta work off that pent-up aggression somehow...

(Kim playing 'Jedi Knight' with an electric cattleprod while everybody else sweatdrops)

Which leads to...
The now infamous White DRagon Fight...with extra players...

Civilian toughs are surrounding Max and Rick when...

"YARRRGGGHHHH!!!"
WHIP*CRACK
ZZZINNNTTTZZZZZZ
WHAPWHAPWHAP
FWHISSSHHHH
"ARGK! GAH!""MY KNEECAPS!" "MY EYES!!! I'M BLIND!!!"
"AAAIEEEE!!!!!!!MY SPLEEN!!!"
Pull back to reveal the Three Bridge Bunnies and Lisa on top of a pile of bodies, hefting their weapons of choice....riding crop, cattleprod, whip, twin cans of mace.
Max: "We ain't NEVER going to live this down.."

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Wed Nov 28, 2007 8:28 pm

LOL!! Very funny Padawan! Someday you too will be a jedimaster!