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Unread postPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2015 7:49 pm
  

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Hero

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taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
[

Basicly like any modren day navy but with robotechnoligy and a much reduced global population.


"We take what we can get, given that our pool of options is much diminished since the Rain of Death. That means accepting some serious dregs..."



That is true also it keeps navel commanders on their toes to keep the men and women under their command in line unless they are as corrupt as their minons....eeerrr the sailors under their command. :mrgreen: :lol:

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Unread postPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2015 8:27 pm
  

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I figure Captain Morgan started out as simply insane, but he became corrupted by his men, or had his initial bloodthirstiness directed towards more productive alternatives by the more scheme-capable crewmembers.

Compare to Major Jones, who went from being a borderline pedophile/teen-boffer(I still think he was framed) and who had to mature to become the anchor of stability that kept his lot from killing each other.

_________________
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"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
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Unread postPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2015 8:30 pm
  

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taalismn wrote:
I figure Captain Morgan started out as simply insane, but he became corrupted by his men, or had his initial bloodthirstiness directed towards more productive alternatives by the more scheme-capable crewmembers.

Compare to Major Jones, who went from being a borderline pedophile/teen-boffer(I still think he was framed) and who had to mature to become the anchor of stability that kept his lot from killing each other.



That maybe true but I think it's both the branches of the UEG armed force and their envroment that made them into what they are now.

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Unread postPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2015 8:40 pm
  

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Badly dysfunctional, if not openly homicidal?

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2015 8:45 pm
  

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taalismn wrote:
Badly dysfunctional, if not openly homicidal?


With kelptomanic tendacies and buding megalomaina.

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Unread postPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2015 11:21 pm
  

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More Things You Don't Want to Hear With the 37th:

"You DID remove the stinging cells from these sea anemones before you used them as 'deep water cabbage', right?"

"Anybody who wanted to visit the bottom of the sea, well, looks like we're ALL going along for the ride."

"Ah, when enough water comes in, the pressure WILL equalize, right?"

"Okay, have you earned your air today?"

"We fire a full torpedo salvo; that way if even two thirds of them malfunction and turn on us, we've at ;east got a few heading in the right direction at the enemy, right?"

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Fri Jul 03, 2015 6:12 am
  

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taalismn wrote:
More Things You Don't Want to Hear With the 37th:

"You DID remove the stinging cells from these sea anemones before you used them as 'deep water cabbage', right?"

"Anybody who wanted to visit the bottom of the sea, well, looks like we're ALL going along for the ride."

"Ah, when enough water comes in, the pressure WILL equalize, right?"

"Okay, have you earned your air today?"

"We fire a full torpedo salvo; that way if even two thirds of them malfunction and turn on us, we've at ;east got a few heading in the right direction at the enemy, right?"


Basicly a *normal* day in the 37th.

_________________
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Unread postPosted: Fri Jul 03, 2015 12:45 pm
  

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Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
More Things You Don't Want to Hear With the 37th:

"You DID remove the stinging cells from these sea anemones before you used them as 'deep water cabbage', right?"

"Anybody who wanted to visit the bottom of the sea, well, looks like we're ALL going along for the ride."

"Ah, when enough water comes in, the pressure WILL equalize, right?"

"Okay, have you earned your air today?"

"We fire a full torpedo salvo; that way if even two thirds of them malfunction and turn on us, we've at ;east got a few heading in the right direction at the enemy, right?"


Basicly a *normal* day in the 37th.


Lt. Anderson: "Sir! I've come up with a new way to launch the Logans from our subs!" :D


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Unread postPosted: Fri Jul 03, 2015 8:09 pm
  

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SRoss wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
[

Lt. Anderson: "Sir! I've come up with a new way to launch the Logans from our subs!" :D


"You DO realize the Logans are a minimum of nine feet wide wide and the torpedo tubes are only twenty-five inches wide?"
"...ah..." :shock:

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Fri Jul 03, 2015 8:27 pm
  

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a Typhoon's R-39 (SS-N-20) Ballstic missiles are 2.4 meters across, a Logan is 2.74 meters. with a little modification to the Typhoon hull, you could install a dozen vertical launch tubes for Logans. even better, since Logans are a lot shorter than an R-39 missile, you could install an airlock of sorts so you could open up the bottom part of the tube for access and maintenance and still have leak prevention beyond the external door. (a typhoon usually has 20 missile tubes, 12 logan sized ones would still leave a bit of extra space in 'sherwood forest' for extra cargo, or room for a fighter maintenance bay)

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Unread postPosted: Fri Jul 03, 2015 9:16 pm
  

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glitterboy2098 wrote:
a Typhoon's R-39 (SS-N-20) Ballstic missiles are 2.4 meters across, a Logan is 2.74 meters. with a little modification to the Typhoon hull, you could install a dozen vertical launch tubes for Logans. even better, since Logans are a lot shorter than an R-39 missile, you could install an airlock of sorts so you could open up the bottom part of the tube for access and maintenance and still have leak prevention beyond the external door. (a typhoon usually has 20 missile tubes, 12 logan sized ones would still leave a bit of extra space in 'sherwood forest' for extra cargo, or room for a fighter maintenance bay)


Yes, that would be the way to go...but this is the ASC's loser-sump, the 37th. They will come to this solution only after tearing down and rebuilding the ship five or six times. :-D

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Fri Jul 03, 2015 10:56 pm
  

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taalismn wrote:
glitterboy2098 wrote:
a Typhoon's R-39 (SS-N-20) Ballstic missiles are 2.4 meters across, a Logan is 2.74 meters. with a little modification to the Typhoon hull, you could install a dozen vertical launch tubes for Logans. even better, since Logans are a lot shorter than an R-39 missile, you could install an airlock of sorts so you could open up the bottom part of the tube for access and maintenance and still have leak prevention beyond the external door. (a typhoon usually has 20 missile tubes, 12 logan sized ones would still leave a bit of extra space in 'sherwood forest' for extra cargo, or room for a fighter maintenance bay)


Yes, that would be the way to go...but this is the ASC's loser-sump, the 37th. They will come to this solution only after tearing down and rebuilding the ship five or six times. :-D


Which will keep them out of trouble for the most part, yes, yes, yes I know I'm being delutional but can't a guy dream once in awhile. 8-) :mrgreen: :lol:

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Unread postPosted: Fri Jul 03, 2015 11:12 pm
  

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Knight

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NO...you may not. :P

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Unread postPosted: Fri Jul 03, 2015 11:40 pm
  

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Arnie100 wrote:
NO...you may not. :P


Fine!, No Punny Humor for you! :-P

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Unread postPosted: Fri Jul 03, 2015 11:53 pm
  

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(At local Monument City bar...)

Chief Toombs: "At least we're not as BAD as these guys..."
37th Trooper: "Nope...YOU guys are WORSE!"

(Barfight ensues which results in a call-out for the GMP...)

GMP Officer: "Should we...?"
Nova: "Oh, no...we're actually doing everyone a favor...thinning out the herd, so to speak."
GMP Officer: "Popcorn, Ma'am?"
Nova: "Thank you...you'll go far with that attitude."

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Unread postPosted: Sat Jul 04, 2015 7:55 pm
  

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Ice Guard Trooper: "Why do I get the feeling we're missing out on some glorious barrroom fights defending our reputation?"
IGTrooper2: "Because you're suffering from icebound delusions of grandeur about our reputation being something to be defended."

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Sat Jul 04, 2015 8:13 pm
  

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taalismn wrote:
Ice Guard Trooper: "Why do I get the feeling we're missing out on some glorious barrroom fights defending our reputation?"
IGTrooper2: "Because you're suffering from icebound delusions of grandeur about our reputation being something to be defended."


" It's always the *realists* that bring everyone else down. "

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Unread postPosted: Sat Jul 04, 2015 8:25 pm
  

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"If course we ARE still locked in a frozen hell...."

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Sun Jul 05, 2015 10:58 am
  

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taalismn wrote:
"If course we ARE still locked in a frozen hell...."


Which proves that *chilling* out in hell is not all it's cracked up to be.

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Unread postPosted: Sun Jul 05, 2015 12:36 pm
  

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(At the Monument City bar...)

Chief Toombs: "We showed those squids!"
Bartender: "Yes, you did...here's the bill for the damages."
Chief Toombs: "HOLY -- " :eek: :shock:

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Unread postPosted: Sun Jul 05, 2015 7:38 pm
  

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Arnie100 wrote:
(At the Monument City bar...)

Chief Toombs: "We showed those squids!"
Bartender: "Yes, you did...here's the bill for the damages."
Chief Toombs: "HOLY -- " :eek: :shock:


" We also take gems and precouse metals in addtion to cash. "

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Unread postPosted: Sun Jul 05, 2015 8:18 pm
  

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Kargan3033 wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:
(At the Monument City bar...)

Chief Toombs: "We showed those squids!"
Bartender: "Yes, you did...here's the bill for the damages."
Chief Toombs: "HOLY -- " :eek: :shock:


" We also take gems and precouse metals in addtion to cash. "


"Blood and healthy organs if we have to...."
"..tough bar..." :shock:

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Sun Jul 05, 2015 10:12 pm
  

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Knight

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GMP Officer: "Should we...?"
Nova: "Nah...let's see him worm his way outta this..."

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Unread postPosted: Sun Jul 05, 2015 10:44 pm
  

Knight

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Bartender: "Or you could take part in a simple competition." :twisted:

Later ... In a dingy back room ... sitting across from a micronized Maitai, Toombs is holding a a revolver to his own head.

Bartender: "DEDE MIO! DEDE MIO!!!"


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Unread postPosted: Sun Jul 05, 2015 10:56 pm
  

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Captain Morgan doesn't play Russian Roulllete, which is smart, considering his sidearm is a single shot flintlock pistol.
They play "Which Button Opens the Airlock?" in the Pathfinders.
They don't play Russian Roulette in Ice Guard because they replaced all the revolvers with heavy automatic weapons(six shots wasn't enough to stop a charging mutant polar bear).

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Sun Jul 05, 2015 11:01 pm
  

Knight

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taalismn wrote:
Captain Morgan doesn't play Russian Roulllete, which is smart, considering his sidearm is a single shot flintlock pistol.
They play "Which Button Opens the Airlock?" in the Pathfinders.
They don't play Russian Roulette in Ice Guard because they replaced all the revolvers with heavy automatic weapons(six shots wasn't enough to stop a charging mutant polar bear).


I believe their version was "How many laps can you do around the base covered in Steak Sauce".


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Unread postPosted: Sun Jul 05, 2015 11:05 pm
  

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Ah yes, streaking at Ice Guard, Au Natural Ala Mode.

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Mon Jul 06, 2015 9:13 am
  

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Hero

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taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:
(At the Monument City bar...)

Chief Toombs: "We showed those squids!"
Bartender: "Yes, you did...here's the bill for the damages."
Chief Toombs: "HOLY -- " :eek: :shock:


" We also take gems and precouse metals in addtion to cash. "


"Blood and healthy organs if we have to...."
"..tough bar..." :shock:


Yes a nice place to take the family for a weekend getaway. :twisted:

Chong Foy head of the 37th securty:" If you think this panty waste bar is tough you should have seen the places my father use to take me to when I was a kid. "

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Unread postPosted: Mon Jul 06, 2015 7:43 pm
  

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"The place I grew up, you weren't even safe on the barroom FLOOR!"

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Mon Jul 06, 2015 7:58 pm
  

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Knight

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"The barroom floor just made it easier for the beat-downs..."

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Unread postPosted: Mon Jul 06, 2015 9:14 pm
  

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Arnie100 wrote:
"The barroom floor just made it easier for the beat-downs..."


"They kept the snakes on the floor..."

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Tue Jul 07, 2015 4:17 pm
  

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taalismn wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:
"The barroom floor just made it easier for the beat-downs..."


"They kept the snakes on the floor..."


Chong Foy:" SNAKES!, MOTHER F***ING SNAKES!, oh please the bars my dad use to drag me to when I was a kid had rusty bear traps covered in s**** on the floors, damn lightweights. " :x :x :x :twisted: :mrgreen: :lol:

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Unread postPosted: Tue Jul 07, 2015 5:49 pm
  

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"You had beartraps? You spoiled rotten bastard! We had punji sticks! And they made us provide our own $#!+!!!"

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Tue Jul 07, 2015 9:06 pm
  

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taalismn wrote:
"You had beartraps? You spoiled rotten bastard! We had punji sticks! And they made us provide our own $#!+!!!"


Oh really now, you got it easy the beartraps were the toilets.

_________________
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "


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Unread postPosted: Tue Jul 07, 2015 10:04 pm
  

Knight

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Location: Vernon, ON. Canada
taalismn wrote:
Ah yes, streaking at Ice Guard, Au Natural Ala Mode.


Of course the resident Gurka starts naked covered in steak sauce, but always finishes with a new fur coat, cloak, rug, etc.


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Unread postPosted: Tue Jul 07, 2015 10:08 pm
  

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SRoss wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Ah yes, streaking at Ice Guard, Au Natural Ala Mode.


Of course the resident Gurka starts naked covered in steak sauce, but always finishes with a new fur coat, cloak, rug, etc.


And makes quite a bit of money sell off the furs to the fashion indestrey.

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Unread postPosted: Tue Jul 07, 2015 11:24 pm
  

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SRoss wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Ah yes, streaking at Ice Guard, Au Natural Ala Mode.


Of course the resident Gurka starts naked covered in steak sauce, but always finishes with a new fur coat, cloak, rug, etc.



Where he got the giant honking chainsaw so big he uses kukri knives as individual blade TEETH is anybody's guess, let alone where he HIDES the damn thing.

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Wed Jul 08, 2015 9:21 am
  

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Hero

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taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Ah yes, streaking at Ice Guard, Au Natural Ala Mode.


Of course the resident Gurka starts naked covered in steak sauce, but always finishes with a new fur coat, cloak, rug, etc.



Where he got the giant honking chainsaw so big he uses kukri knives as individual blade TEETH is anybody's guess, let alone where he HIDES the damn thing.


Well if anything it goes to show that he is a *cut* above the rest.

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Unread postPosted: Wed Jul 08, 2015 7:23 pm
  

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Most militaries worry about athlete's foot and trenchfoot.

In the 37th, it's GILLROT.

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Thu Jul 09, 2015 6:29 pm
  

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Hero

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taalismn wrote:
Most militaries worry about athlete's foot and trenchfoot.

In the 37th, it's GILLROT.


Which is why the 37th has such *Rotten* luck when it comes to deep sea salvage.

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Unread postPosted: Thu Jul 09, 2015 7:44 pm
  

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At least until a Chinese crewmember with fishfarming experience comes up with using mercurochrome...now they just have heavy metal poisoning to worry about...

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Thu Jul 09, 2015 9:47 pm
  

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Hero

Joined: Tue Jul 19, 2011 8:20 pm
Posts: 1367
taalismn wrote:
At least until a Chinese crewmember with fishfarming experience comes up with using mercurochrome...now they just have heavy metal poisoning to worry about...


I guess his *taste* in music tends to be *heavy metal*

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" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "


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Unread postPosted: Thu Jul 09, 2015 10:14 pm
  

Knight

Joined: Mon Dec 26, 2011 6:13 pm
Posts: 4808
Location: Vernon, ON. Canada
Capt. Morgan: "Umm, can anyone tell me why there's a Logan attached to the bow of my sub? I'm looking at you Lt. Anderson..."


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Unread postPosted: Fri Jul 10, 2015 2:46 pm
  

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Knight

Joined: Tue Jun 12, 2007 4:09 am
Posts: 4591
"I was distracted, Sir...I thought I saw a mermaid..."

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They can't see me...Right!?


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Unread postPosted: Fri Jul 10, 2015 3:26 pm
  

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Hero

Joined: Tue Jul 19, 2011 8:20 pm
Posts: 1367
Arnie100 wrote:
"I was distracted, Sir...I thought I saw a mermaid..."


Given the number of crashed Zent ships with malfuctioning fold drives it could be possable that an underwaer rift opened to a world with mermaids and who knows what else.

_________________
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "


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Unread postPosted: Fri Jul 10, 2015 4:43 pm
  

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Knight

Joined: Tue Jun 12, 2007 4:09 am
Posts: 4591
"But, Sir...!"
"Mermaids....are you looking for a Section 8?"

_________________
They can't see me...Right!?


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Unread postPosted: Fri Jul 10, 2015 6:44 pm
  

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Hero

Joined: Tue Jul 19, 2011 8:20 pm
Posts: 1367
Arnie100 wrote:
"But, Sir...!"
"Mermaids....are you looking for a Section 8?"


" Son the whole world is a Section 8 so this is nothing, now does one use *fly* fishing to catch mermaids or not? "

_________________
" Ale and Whores, it's not just your reward, it's your Motivation. "


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Unread postPosted: Fri Jul 10, 2015 8:23 pm
  

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Knight

Joined: Tue Jun 12, 2007 4:09 am
Posts: 4591
"Stun grenades...we want 'em LIVE, Sir!"
"Very GOOD! There's hope for you yet!"

_________________
They can't see me...Right!?


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Unread postPosted: Fri Jul 10, 2015 8:30 pm
  

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Priest

Joined: Tue Sep 02, 2003 8:19 pm
Posts: 43113
Location: Somewhere between Heaven, Hell, and New England
SRoss wrote:
Capt. Morgan: "Umm, can anyone tell me why there's a Logan attached to the bow of my sub? I'm looking at you Lt. Anderson..."



37th doing quick-surface exercises + TASC doing low-altitude flying = not always happy meetings.

"How was I supposed to know they could get the whole damn sub out of the water that high?!"
"I guess our camouflage kept you flyboys from, I dunno, SEEING THE BIG HONKING SUB SURFACING??!!"

_________________
-------------
"Trouble rather the Tiger in his Lair,
Than the Sage among his Books,
For all the Empires and Kingdoms,
The Armies and Works that you hold Dear,
Are to him but the Playthings of the Moment,
To be turned over with the Flick of a Finger,
And the Turning of a Page"

--------Rudyard Kipling
------------


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Unread postPosted: Wed Jul 15, 2015 1:25 pm
  

Knight

Joined: Mon Dec 26, 2011 6:13 pm
Posts: 4808
Location: Vernon, ON. Canada
"Ah we've finally got our new fresh water condenser."

Cut to, a tiny label on the bottom of the tank.

Property of Fukushima Daiichi Genshiryoku Hatsudensho.


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