Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Sep 16, 2016 9:54 am

"So, Annie, what is the range on those shock collars?"
"... argghhh! ..."
Annie: "At least five hundred feet, apparently."

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Sat Sep 17, 2016 12:05 am

Annie: "The new MKII models; however, have a THOUSAND foot range, and can be activated remotelly!" :twisted:

Corg: "Mother..."

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Sat Sep 17, 2016 10:53 am

Arnie100 wrote:Annie: "The new MKII models; however, have a THOUSAND foot range, and can be activated remotelly!"
Corg: "Mother..."

Regis: (Telepathically) *Hello, you've reached the collective mind of the Invid. I'm not available take your call. Please leave a message at the sound of the beep.* :mrgreen:

Corg: "Mom has a telepathic answering machine!?!"

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Sep 17, 2016 11:17 am

SRoss wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:Annie: "The new MKII models; however, have a THOUSAND foot range, and can be activated remotelly!"
Corg: "Mother..."

Regis: (Telepathically) *Hello, you've reached the collective mind of the Invid. I'm not available take your call. Please leave a message at the sound of the beep.*

Corg: "Mom has a telepathic answering machine!?!"

Tall and tan and young and lovely
The girl from Ipanema goes walking and
When she passes, each one she passes goes "ah"

When she walks, she's like a samba
That swings so cool and sways so gentle that
When she passes, each one she passes goes

But I watch her so sadly
How can I tell her, "I love you?"
Yes, I would give my heart gladly
But each day, when she walks to the sea
She looks straight ahead, not at me

Tall and tan and young and lovely
The girl from Ipanema goes walking and
When she passes, I smile but she doesn't see, doesn't see

Olha que coisa mais linda mais cheia de graça
ela menina que vem e que passa
Num doce balanço a caminho do mar

Moça do corpo dourado do sol de ipanema
O seu balançado mais que um poema
a coisa…

"How the hell did she get waiting music on a TELEPATHIC NETWORK????!!!!"

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Sat Sep 17, 2016 7:42 pm

Corg: "Let's try this again...Mother, are you there?"

"You can save more when you buy insurance from Geico!"

Corg: "What the -- ?! Hello....please, answer...."

"AFLAC! AFLAC!"

Corg: "Infomercials?!"

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Sep 17, 2016 8:15 pm

"Thank you for holding, a representative will be with you shortly. This call may be monitored for quality purposes-"
Corg: "Thank Regis!"
"Hello, operator Darryl Taylor jere. How can I assist you?"
Corg: "What the (%*^&%%^?! A-HUMAN- on the Invid network?! What the ^$%&^%$*$&&%*-"

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Sat Sep 17, 2016 8:55 pm

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:Annie: "The new MKII models; however, have a THOUSAND foot range, and can be activated remotelly!"
Corg: "Mother..."

Regis: (Telepathically) *Hello, you've reached the collective mind of the Invid. I'm not available take your call. Please leave a message at the sound of the beep.*

Corg: "Mom has a telepathic answering machine!?!"

Tall and tan and young and lovely
The girl from Ipanema goes walking and
When she passes, each one she passes goes "ah"

When she walks, she's like a samba
That swings so cool and sways so gentle that
When she passes, each one she passes goes

But I watch her so sadly
How can I tell her, "I love you?"
Yes, I would give my heart gladly
But each day, when she walks to the sea
She looks straight ahead, not at me

Tall and tan and young and lovely
The girl from Ipanema goes walking and
When she passes, I smile but she doesn't see, doesn't see

Olha que coisa mais linda mais cheia de graça
ela menina que vem e que passa
Num doce balanço a caminho do mar

Moça do corpo dourado do sol de ipanema
O seu balançado mais que um poema
a coisa…

"How the hell did she get waiting music on a TELEPATHIC NETWORK????!!!!"

As the mental image of the Reges in a Brazilian thong goes out to the multiverse, the night manager at a certain faculty realized that they'll never be able to produce enough Mind Bleach to meet the demands.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Sep 17, 2016 9:28 pm

SRoss wrote:[

As the mental image of the Reges in a Brazilian thong goes out to the multiverse, the night manager at a certain faculty realized that they'll never be able to produce enough Mind Bleach to meet the demands.

"BUSINESS IS BOOMING, MY BOYS!!!!"

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Sat Sep 17, 2016 11:34 pm

Edwards: "D**n, she's hot!"
Kyle: "You really are disturbed, you know that?"

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Sun Sep 18, 2016 10:19 am

Arnie100 wrote:Edwards: "D**n, she's hot!"
Kyle: "You really are disturbed, you know that?"

Corg:

"MOM! EDWARDS!!!" :shock:

"Human! Pass me that Brain Bleach!" :nh:

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Sun Sep 18, 2016 7:15 pm

"Did you hear! Someone told Yandere-chan that the new transfer student from the Legion Academy was talking to Shinji!!!"

Yandere-chan vs Inertron Lass

Erin: (Sipping pina coladas in the Watchtower with Sarah) "I could watch this all day." :twisted:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Sep 18, 2016 7:59 pm

"Spent my whole summer practicing my Martial Arts Number Two Pencil Fighting for this!"

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Tue Sep 20, 2016 11:56 pm

SRoss wrote:"Did you hear! Someone told Yandere-chan that the new transfer student from the Legion Academy was talking to Shinji!!!"

Yandere-chan vs Inertron Lass

Erin: (Sipping pina coladas in the Watchtower with Sarah) "I could watch this all day."

Ryohko::"She's a lightweight. If she can't even beat her with Kamehameha AND a Death Star, she's doing it wrong."
Ayeka: "Indeed."
Tenchi: :shock:

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Wed Sep 21, 2016 10:25 am

Arnie100 wrote:
SRoss wrote:"Did you hear! Someone told Yandere-chan that the new transfer student from the Legion Academy was talking to Shinji!!!"

Yandere-chan vs Inertron Lass

Erin: (Sipping pina coladas in the Watchtower with Sarah) "I could watch this all day."

Ryohko::"She's a lightweight. If she can't even beat her with Kamehameha AND a Death Star, she's doing it wrong."
Ayeka: "Indeed."
Tenchi:

Teen Annie: "Its worse, she hasn't even woken her from her nap."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Sep 21, 2016 7:12 pm

SRoss wrote:
Teen Annie: "Its worse, she hasn't even woken her from her nap."

"I've beaten up tougher alarm clocks than you!"

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Wed Sep 21, 2016 8:14 pm

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:
Teen Annie: "Its worse, she hasn't even woken her from her nap."

"I've beaten up tougher alarm clocks than you!"

Washu: (Looking down her nose at Ryohko and Ayeka) "No, no, you two morons! The transfer student is like Stone Boy! Only her people turn into Inertron rather then stone when they sleep!"

Yandere-chan: "Wait! You're saying I have to wake her, then I can kill her!?!"

Washu and Annie: "Exactly."

batlchip · Unread post by **batlchip** » Wed Sep 21, 2016 9:39 pm

SRoss wrote:
taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:
Teen Annie: "Its worse, she hasn't even woken her from her nap."

"I've beaten up tougher alarm clocks than you!"

Washu: (Looking down her nose at Ryohko and Ayeka) "No, no, you two morons! The transfer student is like Stone Boy! Only her people turn into Inertron rather then stone when they sleep!"

Yandere-chan: "Wait! You're saying I have to wake her, then I can kill her!?!"

Washu and Annie: "Exactly."

Batlchip :" OMG your bringing people from the Tenchi university in are ya insane ? Do you really want the universe's natural disaster here?."
Mioshi :"Who's that?
Batlchip :"Eeeep! *faints*

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Sep 21, 2016 10:49 pm

batlchip wrote:[

Batlchip :" OMG your bringing people from the Tenchi university in are ya insane ? Do you really want the universe's natural disaster here?."
Mioshi :"Who's that?
Batlchip :"Eeeep! *faints*

Waashu-Chan: :shock:

"NO! DON'T PUSH THAT BU-"

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Sep 22, 2016 3:13 pm

taalismn wrote:
batlchip wrote:[

Batlchip :" OMG your bringing people from the Tenchi university in are ya insane ? Do you really want the universe's natural disaster here?."
Mioshi :"Who's that?
Batlchip :"Eeeep! *faints*

Waashu-Chan: "NO! DON'T PUSH THAT BU-"

Lang: "And you all laughed when I had the contractor install buttons that aren't connected to anything..." :lol:

Meanwhile in another corridor...

Edwards: (Surrounded by Roombas, desperately slapping the big red emergency button on the wall) "Oh God! Why isn't anything happening!?!" :eek:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Sep 22, 2016 6:28 pm

SRoss wrote:[Edwards: (Surrounded by Roombas, desperately slapping the big red emergency button on the wall) "Oh God! Why isn't anything happening!?!"

This, after he tried breaking the glass in the 'In Case of Emergency.." cabinet...only to discover they'd upgraded all the lockers with blast-proof armored glazing...

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Sep 22, 2016 7:00 pm

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:[Edwards: (Surrounded by Roombas, desperately slapping the big red emergency button on the wall) "Oh God! Why isn't anything happening!?!"

This, after he tried breaking the glass in the 'In Case of Emergency.." cabinet...only to discover they'd upgraded all the lockers with blast-proof armored glazing...

Don't forget the time Kyle tried to stage a western bar brawl in drama class only to find we'd replaced all the break-away glass bottles and windows with MDC Armoured glass.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Sep 22, 2016 8:14 pm

SRoss wrote:[

Don't forget the time Kyle tried to stage a western bar brawl in drama class only to find we'd replaced all the break-away glass bottles and windows with MDC Armoured glass.

And the chairs weren't from Ikea.

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Fri Sep 23, 2016 10:56 am

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:[

Don't forget the time Kyle tried to stage a western bar brawl in drama class only to find we'd replaced all the break-away glass bottles and windows with MDC Armoured glass.

And the chairs weren't from Ikea.

Praxian Student: (Looking down at Kyle, twitching under the table she threw at him) "Wimp..." :roll:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Sep 23, 2016 7:07 pm

Karbarrean Shop Teacher:(looking at Edwards' boots sticking out from under the caved-on steel door)"Doors are kinda flimsy too."

batlchip · Unread post by **batlchip** » Sat Sep 24, 2016 3:43 am

Minmai ( looking at corg with a microp gone stand sticking through him.) "Guess the catwalk wasn't very sturdy after all."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Sep 24, 2016 7:51 pm

batlchip wrote:Minmai ( looking at corg with a microp gone stand sticking through him.) "Guess the catwalk wasn't very sturdy after all."

Lisa: "Damn...she tested it with an animal first...."

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Sat Sep 24, 2016 9:29 pm

Arnie100: "I have some concerns about the new SexEd teacher you hired."

Urd: "Alright class! I'm here to help you pathetic losers get some!"

Taalismn: "US! I thought you hired her!?!"

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Sep 24, 2016 11:03 pm

"Deny her access to the school Chemistry Lab, and we might survive the semester..."

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Sun Sep 25, 2016 2:42 pm

taalismn wrote:"Deny her access to the school Chemistry Lab, and we might survive the semester..."

"What about the new shop teacher?"

Sculd: "I don't care who you are! MY BUG CHOMPER DOESN'T NEED MORE POWER!!!" :badbad:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Sep 25, 2016 3:48 pm

Skuld: "Wanna see what this thing does on reaching hands?"
Tim: "...nope...."

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Sun Sep 25, 2016 5:13 pm

Meanwhile... Alone in a dark corner of the Defence Against Dark Arts classroom...

Corg: "At last, I'm safe... I wonder what there is for entertainment."

(Looks around)

Corg: "Nothing but this CD... No CD player though... I know! I'll just use this record player! It's about the size of a 45!"

Mara: (Appearing in the room) "Wow! Who'd have thought there would be another person on Earth dumb enough to play CD on a record player."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Sep 25, 2016 7:36 pm

SRoss wrote:Meanwhile... Alone in a dark corner of the Defence Against Dark Arts classroom...

Corg: "At last, I'm safe... I wonder what there is for entertainment."

(Looks around)

Corg: "Nothing but this CD... No CD player though... I know! I'll just use this record player! It's about the size of a 45!"

Mara: (Appearing in the room) "Wow! Who'd have thought there would be another person on Earth dumb enough to play CD on a record player."

Coulda turned on the TV monitor and gotten 'The Ring'..... :twisted:

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Mon Sep 26, 2016 2:51 am

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:Meanwhile... Alone in a dark corner of the Defence Against Dark Arts classroom...

Corg: "At last, I'm safe... I wonder what there is for entertainment."

(Looks around)

Corg: "Nothing but this CD... No CD player though... I know! I'll just use this record player! It's about the size of a 45!"

Mara: (Appearing in the room) "Wow! Who'd have thought there would be another person on Earth dumb enough to play CD on a record player."

Coulda turned on the TV monitor and gotten 'The Ring'.....

"Check out this vhs I found!"

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Mon Sep 26, 2016 10:42 am

Arnie100 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:Meanwhile... Alone in a dark corner of the Defence Against Dark Arts classroom...

Corg: "At last, I'm safe... I wonder what there is for entertainment."

(Looks around)

Corg: "Nothing but this CD... No CD player though... I know! I'll just use this record player! It's about the size of a 45!"

Mara: (Appearing in the room) "Wow! Who'd have thought there would be another person on Earth dumb enough to play CD on a record player."

Coulda turned on the TV monitor and gotten 'The Ring'.....

"Check out this vhs I found!"

"That's just the tape from my Video Dating Service." :erm:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Sep 26, 2016 7:09 pm

"Actually...she's pretty hot...Oh come on, we're young and hormonal and supposed to be stupid!"

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Mon Sep 26, 2016 8:09 pm

Urd: "Bacchus god of Wine, bring forth some social lubricant!" :twisted:

Arnie100: "MY LIQUOR CABINET! BEGONE FROM THERE DEVIL WOMAN!!!"

Urd: "Don't worry, I'm just going to have this, and a little bit of that, Oooohhh, and some of this as well."

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Mon Sep 26, 2016 9:31 pm

SRoss wrote:Urd: "Bacchus god of Wine, bring forth some social lubricant!"

Arnie100: "MY LIQUOR CABINET! BEGONE FROM THERE DEVIL WOMAN!!!"

Urd: "Don't worry, I'm just going to have this, and a little bit of that, Oooohhh, and some of this as well."

Urd: "Join me!" (Waving a bottle...)
Arnie100: "Oh; what the hell..."

(4 hours later...)

Arnie100 and Urd:
"Show me the way to go home
I'm tired and I want to go to bed
I had a little drink about an hour ago
And it’s gone right to my head
Everywhere I roam
Over land or sea or foam
You can always hear me singing this song
Said show me the way to go home.

Show me the way to go home
I'm tired and I want to go to bed
I had a little drink about an hour ago
And it’s gone right to my head
Everywhere that I roam
Over land or sea or foam
You can always hear me singing this song
Show me the way to go home.

Show me, show me
Show me the road I leach home
Show me, show me
Show me the way to go home.
Everywhere that I roam
Over land or sea or foam
You can always hear me singing this song
Said show me, show me the way, to go home"

taalismn: :shock:

SRoss: "They're not bad...Urd's definitely better then Minmei."

batlchip · Unread post by **batlchip** » Tue Sep 27, 2016 2:27 am

Arnie100 wrote:
SRoss wrote:Urd: "Bacchus god of Wine, bring forth some social lubricant!"

Arnie100: "MY LIQUOR CABINET! BEGONE FROM THERE DEVIL WOMAN!!!"

Urd: "Don't worry, I'm just going to have this, and a little bit of that, Oooohhh, and some of this as well."

Urd: "Join me!" (Waving a bottle...)
Arnie100: "Oh; what the hell..."

(4 hours later...)

Arnie100 and Urd:
"Show me the way to go home
I'm tired and I want to go to bed
I had a little drink about an hour ago
And it’s gone right to my head
Everywhere I roam
Over land or sea or foam
You can always hear me singing this song
Said show me the way to go home.

Show me the way to go home
I'm tired and I want to go to bed
I had a little drink about an hour ago
And it’s gone right to my head
Everywhere that I roam
Over land or sea or foam
You can always hear me singing this song
Show me the way to go home.

Show me, show me
Show me the road I leach home
Show me, show me
Show me the way to go home.
Everywhere that I roam
Over land or sea or foam
You can always hear me singing this song
Said show me, show me the way, to go home"

taalismn:
SRoss: "They're not bad...Urd's definitely better then Minmei."

Batlchip :"shhh before the idol masters show up and sign her to a record deal."

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Tue Sep 27, 2016 1:41 pm

SRoss: "Oh, those guys don't come around here... Minmei leaves too many booby traps."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Sep 27, 2016 5:12 pm

Arnie100 wrote:[
(4 hours later...)

Arnie100 and Urd:
"Show me the way to go home
I'm tired and I want to go to bed
I had a little drink about an hour ago
And it’s gone right to my head
Everywhere I roam
Over land or sea or foam
You can always hear me singing this song
Said show me the way to go home.."

Bravo(claps hands)...

Proper accreditation to "Irving King" for that one.

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Wed Sep 28, 2016 7:25 pm

Skuld: "At last! My Banpei RX Hall Monitor is complete!" :twisted:

Taalismn: "Oh well, can't be worse than the ED-209."

SRoss: "Should we have really let her use parts from Bun Bun to build that?" :shock:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Sep 28, 2016 9:02 pm

SRoss wrote:Skuld: "At last! My Banpei RX Hall Monitor is complete!"

Taalismn: "Oh well, can't be worse than the ED-209."

SRoss: "Should we have really let her use parts from Bun Bun to build that?"

"Com'on, it's not as if the students actually use the halls; they've learned to break through the walls..."

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Wed Sep 28, 2016 11:00 pm

SRoss wrote:Skuld: "At last! My Banpei RX Hall Monitor is complete!"

Taalismn: "Oh well, can't be worse than the ED-209."

SRoss: "Should we have really let her use parts from Bun Bun to build that?"

"Wait...who's Bun Bun?

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Sep 29, 2016 10:55 am

Arnie100 wrote:
SRoss wrote:Skuld: "At last! My Banpei RX Hall Monitor is complete!"

Taalismn: "Oh well, can't be worse than the ED-209."

SRoss: "Should we have really let her use parts from Bun Bun to build that?"

"Wait...who's Bun Bun?

Depending on who you ask, either an enormous alien killing armoured vehicle, or a small bunny.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Sep 29, 2016 4:02 pm

I'm going with the rabbit. I believe he's been cyborged(at least once).

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Thu Sep 29, 2016 4:38 pm

taalismn wrote:I'm going with the rabbit. I believe he's been cyborged(at least once).

Ditto. No one expects a cute bunny.

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Sep 29, 2016 5:26 pm

Arnie100 wrote:
taalismn wrote:I'm going with the rabbit. I believe he's been cyborged(at least once).

Ditto. No one expects a cute bunny.

That rabbit is a killer I tell you.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Sep 29, 2016 5:28 pm

"Too bad hand grenades, holy or otherwise, are NOT in short supply in this school."
"Though counting ability is suspect..."

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Sep 29, 2016 11:45 pm

Roombas: <<WE ARE NOT CLEANING UP AFTER THAT, THAT RODENT!!!>>

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Sep 30, 2016 12:11 am

SRoss wrote:Roombas: <<WE ARE NOT CLEANING UP AFTER THAT, THAT RODENT!!!>>

"It's found the blind spot on top of them."